Mario and Bowser: Frenemies Forever 2
Property of Bowser (Chapter 11)
Disclaimer: Mario and co belong to Nintendo.
"Let's GO! Get out there! DO SOMETHING!" Bowser commanded.
Scampering around the green hills koopa troopas frightened all toads taking residence out, allowing the Troop to secure an entire region of Sky Land to plunder. Many resources would be needed starting from scratch to they worked quickly. Aerially the winged baddies soared in clusters to reconnoiter the land. Satisfied with the group (and it truly was more than he expected) of soldiers smart enough to read the sign posted on his castle's crumbling front doors, Bowser returned to the spiraling landmark tower. It rose into another portion of the kingdom he was yet grace with his presence. Bowser climbed inside a puny airship that could fit a half dozen, the mantra of 'row row row' from before sickening so he made a solo trip with only himself and this thoughts of how all his troubles were Mario's fault. Somehow it always came back to that plumber, like a part of Mario was always with him. -A part Bowser would like to rip out and obliterate with fire..
Still shuddering, Tanner lowered the basket of ice flowers and speed flowers, now scorched flowers. He guessed it was his fault for talking to Bowser while he was clearly in a reverie. "If you don't like these, sorry sir!"
"Forget the stupid decorations. Since you're here, all status?" Bowser growled. Sulking on his throne salvaged from his old castle and in one of the most isolated parts of the tower he could find, he was sure his minions would get the picture. Apparently not.
"Most never showed up because they 'went south' boss," reported Sentry 11, significantly less menacing in broad daylight. "But this is a big kingdom and you got a thousand tallied."
Bowser stomped his foot repeatedly and the brick began to crumble. "Go back to where you need to be. NOW!" And they left.
On the tower's roof top that stopped just short of the puffy white clouds it was like family night in a twisted way, complete with inappropriate tales being told even if unintentionally. The royal honorary Koopa Troop all hung out for fresh air and it was almost relaxing before Morton got a little too curious about how last night went.
"So our janitor Zoo is dead? Perished? Deceased?" In that moment Morton ran out of fingernails to bite.
"Yeah and angry mobs came around by morning blaming us," Lemmy explained. All he needed was a flashlight to shine under his face and a thunder effect to add the cherry on top of that haunting tale. "Aaaand we had to hide and didn't see the rest." The rainbow haired koopaling paused sort of awkwardly, a hint of guilt underneath. Without a formal meeting, he Ludwig and Iggy silently agreed to not speak about anything. The reasons were plenty aside from not wanting to look bad. They all had holes in their own story. Ludwig for instance insisted something bizarre was going on with the laptop while viewing video capture from Iggy who had no recollection of what he'd recorded from Peach's floating castle and Lemmy had nothing to do with anything, too occupied all of yesterday making sure their other siblings cooperated with Ludwig's scheme. It was a mess. All they knew was that Zoo had some sort of item none of them understood and used it causing the disaster. "We don't really know, uh, how it all went crazy as a cracker," Lemmy concluded.
Roy pretended to not listen. He kept waving formations for the paratroopas above to perform advance maneuvers since he'd be invading the castle with a squad Bowser selected for him because he begged so much to do it. It took five minutes for him to realize they were spelling out the name of his last ex girlfriend to mock him and so he yelled at them the rest of the time. Junior was leaning on his elbows looking down from the tower and watching little people below move around like insects. It had not settled with the six year old yet that he really wasn't returning home. To him this was like an extension of Koopa Scouts with all of the similarities, constant moving around, sleeping outside, people screaming, and mismanagement. He wondered how his scouting skills could help so he wandered off secretly.
Wendy, who was rolled on her stomach jumped up and joined the brothers. Feeling she was still in the hot bench over alluding to be associated with the group that kicked her family out of their own kingdom, she been searching for something to restore some favor. After scrolling around on her phone she'd found it. "Now it's all over Facebook now that we left Dark Land due to a Bowser Bomb gone wrong! Well we all know that's FAKE NEWS so I'm going to report all of their accounts and I need you all to help me!"
Ludwig, trying to be invisible before that point, felt the pit in his stomach threaten to become a black hole. Caught between blaming himself for everything and for nothing at all- after all he was 'possessed' by something as his brothers told him, he'd been more silent than ever. He needed a reality check and reluctant to admit it there was someone he could always count on for clarity, even if a few coarse words would often get thrown into the mix.
"Larry, could you assist me?" Ludwig approached Larry while he was listening to music habitually and directed him to a moisture faded page of his 'Ex spatio obiecti specialem Lexicon'.
Larry slung the headphones off with a flash of fear then gave him a vexed look. "What did I do?"
"Nothing. Just notice this quickly please."
He sighed. "Stars: Stars are celestial beings, a 'higher authority' to aid the Mushroom Kingdom-" Larry shoved the book back into Ludwig's chest. "I know this junk already. Why a theology project now? You sneak out last night and now you want to pick on me?"
"Excuse me?"
"We all know you know more than you're saying but-" He sighed again and stared away at nothing. "Whatever it was it don't matter. Nothing matters anymore 'cause we're homeless.."
"Do not say that! This is our home now, General Larry."
"Don't call me that," he snapped. "Why did you shove your nerd book in my face?"
"I was just curious of your thoughts. Are you secretly studious regarding stars? Most koopas would not be," Ludwig ventured neutrally, though Roy and Wendy picked up the conversation then and shunned Larry with a snort of disapproval.
Larry's gaze whipped from them to his eldest brother again. "Me?! No way! -Say that again and I'll slap ya! ...I just heard about that star stuff through the grape vine. I ain't...one of them hippy toad appeasin' lame koopas. Alright?"
"Fair enough!" Ludwig wisely left alone. He then knew what he was going to do. He would go out and get his badge. All of this, whatever this situation was unfolding to be, would be for naught if he did not. After all, Peach was still in their possession so he was a success technically and he should feel proud of it. Yet he didn't.
He strolled past Iggy isolated from the others with that watch salvaged from Zoo's home disassembled on the ground, multicolored wires outstretched and resembling a sort of monster on the stone floor. Ludwig watched him for a moment. His brother insisted they take that from the wreckage for reasons he would not elaborate on. He suspected it was vintage or something, but Ludwig never knew Iggy to be the horologist suddenly.
"-Luddy, you know what happened back home was pretty messed up," Iggy told him in a less squeaky and more naturalistic tone of voice. "But I agree we shouldn't talk about it too much right now."
Ludwig frowned inwardly. "There is a time and place for everything."
"Yeah, like me working on this watch project. I can't get Lemmy's wrist watch out of my head."
Ludwig took the time to crouch down with him. After a second remembered that very small thing he was referring to. "The 'time stopping' one that was drawn on his wrist?"
"Yeah. I like that idea. It might be important. But instead of stopping time due to the hands never moving what if- oh you know how quantum physics is..."
Ludwig listen, unsure of what to make from that especially since it was a fifty-fifty chance there was a decent idea in there somewhere or just Iggy being Iggy. "Well I've decided to leave and register for my badge out of town. I'm about to tell Vater now."
"Oh, cool. Go ahead to Poshley Heights to claim it or whatever! It'll be alright in the end."
Ludwig pat him on the shoulder. "I want to believe you." He stood up with renewed zeal for his trip even if for the least logical reason ever, that being that Iggy's approval. He would take a quick train and return just in time for his father's wedding, hopefully with new valor.
...
A toad with a scarlet scarf wrapped around them tightly inched their way over a hill. The koopatrol stationed at the north boarder felt on edge meeting them adjacent to the newly erected gate. He was the first line of defense for the new 'Dark' Land, Sky Land. Tanner volunteered the perilous duty because he needed space and a distraction from his aching heart. Everything that had happened, the displacement, lack of supplies, and losing his friend Zoo- that loss not being officially announced, would have made him a useless soldier otherwise. He only knew Zoo didn't make it in the storm because his house was reported flattened and his friend never missed a day of work. Plus Tanner was 'on campus' at the castle so he'd also lost his home. Heck, he even wondered about that new new toad girl minion. They occasionally had a Mushroom Kingdomite cross over to the Dark Land side, but they were usually enemy species feeling neglected in that toad world.
"-What's up?" the woman greeted with an air of familiarity towards him.
He stared and then it clicked. He dropped his spear ecstatically. "Emery! You're okay!"
Bowser's one-thousand and first soldier ran up, winded as she clung to him. "I know about the castle and all that. Neo Bowser City is a mess with these weird dorks taking over so I got here however I could. I borrowed this car."
"Oh my God. I'm so happy you- Okay gotta focus. Uh.. where the car?" Tanner scanned around.
A wide bodied black colored limousine was stuck in a low hanging cloud down the hill. His herculean strength plus her lesser but earnest effort eventually pushed it up and over the other side for it to roll freely and crash into the gate and then keep on going, making others wonder where the in the world it came from. Tanner held his breath until Emery burst into laughter. Soon he joined her, fears draining. Some of them at least.
...
Yoshi was outside in the high grass playing with Poochy and occasionally waving to neighboring yoshis going about business. He tossed back and forth the stick to buy time until he thought Birdo would be less angry. She could be overbearing but her motivations ran true. He should just stop to enjoy life sometimes. He wasn't getting any younger.
"Isn't that right, boy?" Yoshi's friend licked his face and barked happily. "Poochy! Stop! Ha!"
When Yoshi returned 'the misses' was out and that was odd because he didn't see her leave. A bit deviously he let the dog in since typically his fiancée hated that. They were going to have to reach a consensus on that issue if they were really going to tie the knot as Dinosaur Land winters could be rough. There were actually a couple of things they need to speak about, petty ways they'd get on each other's nerves. It could only be because they didn't spend enough time together to be a couple and that made him feel guilty. He'd need to fix that maybe with another expensive gift even better than his last one to her, her iPhone. Speaking of which he noticed she'd left her device on the counter and its screen was on from a missed notification. Picking it up he caught some of the national news on the lock screen.
"Bowser taking over Sky Land and abandoning ruined Dark Land? Isle Delfino hit by typhoon? Mario still missing in action?" The phone slipped from his hand while he scampered around looking for his things to leave with, a hat, passes, snacks.. Poochy barked and snarled at the door before circling around. The front door was kicked opened and Birdo stepped in, her attention darting to her phone on the floor unlocked.
"Yoshi!" She scooped it up as something began to brew within her. Her fiancée's prints were all over it she noticed.
Yoshi's head popped up from the drawer. "I didn't mean to eavesdrop honey, but that's besides the point now. I HAVE to go." He weaved around her before she had a chance to put up an excuse. He grabbed his hat from the rack and his bag, but it was too light. Yoshi froze with a foot out the door.
"Can't leave Yoshi's Island without a passport, T. Yoshisaur."
Wisely facing out the door while doing this, he rolled his eyes. "...I'm coming back, okay? This isn't the hurt you I promise. Sometimes I-"
"Just have things that are more important that me come up, correct? Dear? But you can't leave without that passport," she repeated, foot tapping the floor.
Yoshi kept his head sunk low, carefully finding his words. "I'm sorry."
"Not enough! You're going nowhere!"
Yoshi faced her again, catching himself in her glare. Now something else brewed in him, so unexpected he didn't notice his volume creep up. "You can't say that! I've left the island without it plenty of times without it. I'm not a slave to anyone's rules!"
Birdo stepped up, poking him. "Of course not when you list your residence as the Mushroom Kingdom to evade taxes, bring your dog inside, and tick off your girlfriend! You think no one is the boss of you? I'm telling the village leader about everything you do and then we'll see if you care about rules!"
"Baby! I didn't mean to yell!" Yoshi sputter and as their pet yapped in between them.
"Stay away! Just stay away!" Birdo screamed, pushing him back and jumping straight on her phone. Yoshi regretted setting up that speed dial for her because she was using it and calling the resident village leader. How grim he thought among another billion things in that second. He would have been the leader of the land if his frequent trips away and working with Mario didn't disqualify him. He could have been the rule setter. But he wasn't. And he was helpless.
Yoshi darted through the jungle paths as quick as he could. If Birdo riled up the leader there could soon be a herd of fifty or more fellow dinos after him. He found a train passing through at a crossing and flutter jumped into a car, landing in a pile of hay. He spat out the twigs and examined his surroundings, old props and banners saying 'Emerald Circus'. It smelt like it too. Then he peeked into the next cart and there were a few tramps seated. He went into what he thought was the most vacant car until an old koopa troopa who he hadn't noticed seated locked eyes with him.
"I guess Mario sent you to hunt me down and stomp my face, Yoshi?"
Yoshi plopped down next to the plain clothed koopa. "No I'm.. running from my own bride," he replied emptily.
"I know that feeling. I'm practically married to trouble." Doctor Professor Koopa smiled. He held his shoulder and had stubble spotting the corners of his face, but was otherwise just as yesterday.
Bluntly impacted by the surrealness Yoshi was mute.
"What am I doing in here you meant? Fleeing to Sarasaland one way or the other, even if this method's bad for my back, heh."
"Weren't there more of you? That mean nurse. That.. whomp. Uh.. some others?"
"The rest of the crew got caught I heard. They'll find a way. I mean, we found a way from the pits we came from into the most prestigious sparkly clean health facility of those bigot toads and even ran the princess out. We can do anything."
Yoshi breathed in and then out heavily, frazzled, feeling like an actor without their cue cards. "All I know right now is...I really shouldn't let you get a clean getaway."
Dr. Prof. Koopa clicked his tongue. "Funny there's a line to cross to become the dreaded 'bad guy' and now all you can think of is what they program you 'heroes' to. I know I may have inconvenienced a few Mushroom Flu patients yesterday but if I told you that I was a 'good guy' saving the lives of five times that many once? Yes, decades ago partnering with Dr. Mario we wiped it out of Dark Land. Wanna know how it got there in the first place?"
"I- I really- Does it matter?"
"I'm not getting to you, boy. Which registers more on the scale of good and evil? I know something most don't and never will learn..."
Yoshi didn't know himself lately and this was another one of those times. He couldn't stop crawling further like a Tap-Tap heading for a cliff. He wanted to know more both of the Mushroom Flu story and of that philosophical treasure being dangled before him. "Okay then talk. We have the time."
The doctor smiled again with a twinkle in his eye. "You won't find 'Dr. Prof. Koopa' in any case reports because I'm actually Theodore V. Koopa. See, I was a Dr. Koopa to Peach as a little girl working in her castle then got shafted by her father. Kicked to the curb. Over paranoia. I quickly became Prof. Koopa to a young adult Bowser, obtaining all sorts of free reign to press science further right when the Mushroom Flu broke out. Ah. See something odd about this? There is a rumor to this day that they tried to kill Dark Land's budding kingdom off back then. Who would be so heartless to attack a koopa king with one son and a pregnant wife with their second. The new one's name was gonna be Lemmy-"
Yoshi felt a jolt, it couldn't be true. "So that's where your pseudonym comes from. You are a doctor and professor."
"I hope you didn't have to sleep on that one. Don't you feel smart?"
"What else?"
"Well you know the rest, or do you? Perhaps you don't really know your Mushroom Kingdom friends well."
Yoshi stood up, repulsed from head to toe at that accusation. "They wouldn't try to brutally kill off the koopas if that's where you're going! Like I'm taking your word as a slimy crook over theirs."
Doctor Professor leisurely directed his attention out the window while high brown grass scrolled by. With a bump, the train began to cross a bridge over water. "I thought you were daft but I get it now. You know what's up but don't want to challenge the good and evil binary. Heh. Let me tell you I've worked on both sides. I'm cultured, as they'd put it. One person's good is another's evil and who sets what's what? Who's really the judge of the world? Please don't tell me the Stars, or I take back my first statement!" he laughed.
Yoshi flushed. It was a feeling in the heart. But how do you explain such to someone without one, like the doctor at his feet. "It is set because.. Good is is.. good. You just know it."
The koopa did a creepy little laugh. "Yep, that's the response I expected. So predictable. I've also studied psychology so I won't add to your mid life crisis. Maybe once you ditch the girlfriend you're struggling to keep up for appearances sake you'll graduate from daft to plain ol' dummy!"
Yoshi grabbed the koopa doctor and dragged him up to his level. "You should not have went there! No studies of yours or mind games mean you understand ANYTHING about me. Life has went to crap lately. Crap! I won't get starting on what going on at home. My friends may die because of Bowser- and you! You still abated us yesterday so if they don't make it-"
"And what will you do. Kill me? Like you would!" the doctor struggled to answer with Yoshi squeezing so hard in rage. He put on a smirk. "In the universe good things and bad things happen without favoritism, it was never personal. But ..I will admit, that's what all of you mushroom bastards deserve and I wouldn't take it back!"
Yoshi gawked for a second and then it went red for him. He tossed the doctor halfway across the cabin. Hay and dust flew up. It cleared and his vision went black as someone clung to his face and they struggled about on the floor. Their fight went back against the window. Yoshi grappled with the frailer older koopa and managed to raise him up again. Outside the open window were deep gravel filled pits. Yoshi dangled him out the window, threating to drop him. "Here's a game for you! Is this a 'good' act or a 'bad' one? Hmm. You get a point for being a psycho. Another for libel against my friends. Another for- what is so funny right now?"
"Not all of your friends. Heh. Just Peach," he replied almost frivolously which infuriated Yoshi more. "She's the one I'd could care less about. The rest are just collateral and you will be too Yoshi once you're too old to be of any help. Make a career change. Time is running out for your move so MAKE IT!"
Yoshi made his move, and before he knew it his hands were empty and wind blew in his face. As the world came to in fast motion, Yoshi poked his head out of the window in time to see a faded green shell spinning as it rolled down the gravel pits. Then time slowed as he saw the doctor accidentally dislodge his shell enough to suffer a direct head smack against the rock. He saw the limp body continue to slide down and pebbles from above follow it. Speedily as the train traveled, the shelled corpse was of view in seconds though it took minutes for Yoshi to slide away from the window. He lost his sense of time again. Next all he knew he was sick and kneeled down to lose his lunch from that morning.
...
A bowl little edible land snails was dropped on the table before the noki seated himself alone, thinking about whatever to keep his mind busy, nursery rhymes like 'Une Souris Verte' to that dog he and Agent N were going to adopt back home. High barbed iron fences caged him in with the others, hooligans and gangs, during lunch break outside with the sounds of plastic utensils scraping against like trays frequent. There was a single south and north guard stationed and three barriers separating him from a Poshley Heights shopping center with a food cart and all. That must have been entertaining for tourists in town.
"To think, something worse than hospital food.." Jelectro picked up from the next table over. Nass, a shy guy, another toad, and a whomp from Mushroom Kingdom Hospital huddled together at one table. He stood to join them as friendly as he could, watching them stare strangly.
"Madam, thank you for those directions to the information station," he said to the elder toad, '(Mariam?)' as he'd just bothered to learn.
Her face sparkled in recognition. "Dearie! How-?!"
"Tourist, remember? I kid. Still planning that getaway to Sarasaland?"
The whomp, Dr. Terrace, sized him up and down. "You're the extra that was dragged here. He ain't one of us."
"One of you? You are all from Dark Land," Jelectro declared.
Nass continued leaning on her elbow miserably. Her black hair was messy and she would be unrecognizable if not for her designer prescription glasses. "Theodore told you, right? Why would he? He doesn't even tell me things sometimes."
"Rough for someone always doing those 'personal' favors for him," teased Azul, the blue shy guy. Mariam protectively punched the young man much bigger than her rather unfitting for an eighty year old.
"I can get us all out of here if you listen," Jelectro explained down low. "Escort me out while disguised as a guard Miss Mariam. The rest will fall into place. I know you can, because you are not a toad at all!"
With a poof so quick only those at the table could perceive it, the toad became a being covered with white bed sheet like clothe. Yellow frightened eyes and a tuft of red hair were the only distinguishing features. "H-how did you? I just wanted better job opportunities twenty five years ago and being a toad old lady gave me that!"
Nass, Azul, and Dr. Terrace were astonished for only a moment, then it was back to moping. Nothing excited them, they really were from Dark Land.
"Are we all in agreement?" Jelectro received only grunts. He guessed they would just have to see it to believe it. Mariam became a toad guard at the detective's lead, quickly enough to avoid suspicion and walked together to the gate early.
"What's wrong with the runt?" The guard barked, his hand already on a radio for backup.
"I'm sick," Jelectro answered weakly. The noki drooped over and puked right on the concrete and inches away from the guards shiny black boots. The guard reeled back along with the other two closest guards.
"Get him out of here!" they screamed at once, dry heaving.
Jelectro and Miriam ran through the first gate and in the little clearance. Ahead next gate was even taller than the rest with more guards. "I didn't know you were sick," the dooplighost whispered with some concern.
"I wasn't at first. It's just a bio-manipulation, gross but it works," Jelectro explained, already putting the next phase into action and directing his attention to the guards manning the office next to the doors out. It had been a while since he'd done the next trick he was about to do.
"-It's Zip Toad!" a guard on lookout squealed. Guards rushed out the office and unchained the second lock to line up against the most outer fence as the celebrity strolled by. They did this so hurriedly they left the doors to the office wide open, allowing Jelectro to slip in and see the rows of steel lockers with confiscated items. He told Mariam to stay with the other guards and pretend to care so they did so.
"Autograph? Please?" the warden, huddled with many others, asked Zip T.
The blond toad celebrity lingering around the food cart stopped and pointed to his self in bewilderment. "Me? Lost my pen when I outran all five of 'em MKABC or whatever health inspectors last week," he explained in a unusual raspy tone. "Especially the big ol' goomba called Richard. He was crazy. Have sometin' else for ya! Grilled straight from my trailer home!" He grabbed a 'Boggles Dogs' from the cart, extra stuffed with cheese and offered it to no takers. Shrugging he helped himself only to make many of the guards watch him fall over and choke due to eating too quickly.
"Whoa! Somebody do something! Even if I wouldn't eat his disgusting food he's my idol!" one said.
"I don't know CPR. Any doctors in the house?"
"Over there!" Mariam spoke up, pointing to the MK East doctors back in the eating court.
"We can't let inmates.. oh whatever! Open the gates and let them!" the senior warden ordered.
The staff got shoved away from their tables out the gates to aid the blonde super star sprawled out on the sidewalk turning blue all the while. Disorientated but aware of civic duty they surrounded him just as a flash went off. 'Zip T.' coughed and miraculously a grubby clubba in a rain beater appeared in his place.
"Oh!" Nass exclaimed, piecing it all with her clever mind. "Someone created a sort of illusion or ruse on this young man. Go!"
"Thanks but sorry!" Apologetically Mariam ran ahead with the doctors onto the clubba's food truck. The guards realized the break and spilled out of the jail building in vain as the truck sped down the finely cut brick road. Jelectro was brushed aside and ignored in the drama, all according plan. Wow, he thought. Mitch was right. When he used the gifts Eldstar gave him sometimes it could work out. Sometimes.
...
Mere minutes after Roy's army of one-hundred stormed the clouds above, his soldiers were kicking out remaining mushroom retainers and last the king, an old frail man still in slippers if it wasn't more obvious the kingdom was blindsided by the invasion. Two hammer bros escorted the King to Roy.
"Remember when I promised to return years back? I was telling da truth! Now I run dis joint!" the koopaling laughed. Roy got to enjoy the plush red seat and the exquisite gold and checkerboard halls in peace for all of five minutes before someone barged in.
"Great job, Roy. Everyone GO GO GO!" Bowser ushered in as many minions as could be packed inside, busily stepping all over Roy's feet with supplies in hand and banners. Shortly they forced him off and on to the floor.
Bowser kept barking orders. "This castle gonna be the wedding hall. Hey, no I want fruit punch there! You! Drop the ice sculpture here! Kamek, you're holding the ruler upside down.."
Disgruntled but expecting as much, Roy stomped out into the clouds and down to the tower to go back to DMing girls he guessed or he could sneak peeks at Peach who was getting fitted for her dress in a locked room of the tower. Decisions decisions!
...
"You like to swim right?" Wendy showed off a sleeveless flowing dress that was also flowing with water from the hose attachment. It was a beach inspired, blue as the ocean with real starfish attached and squirming.
"You don't like it? Our dear Clawdia wore this one anniversary, you know!" Kammy lectured nostalgically.
Peach politely declined, a captive in a stranger way than usual, seated down uncomfortably on a stool. At least she had lots of time to mull over it all. She missed her hero Mario. If she (and him to be honest) acted a little more like adults yesterday she might not be in this predicament. Kammy next presented something very vintage and regal and white with a crinoline many times her width. Peach estimated it might be her style in oh, about fifty more years when she was also a granny.
"...I'm telling!" Bowser Junior snickered right outside the door they were in.
Larry, crouched down at the keyhole nearly wet himself. He made sure they were alone. "Shhh! It ain't what you think! We can't let this happen!"
"Daddy's wedding?"
Larry poked Junior's chest right between his badges. "That's right! If dad marries it's gonna suck for all of us. Us runts gotta, you know, cooperate."
Junior snapped his childish fingers. "Like that thing people do after their married?"
Larry went blank before his face wrinkled up and he almost barfed. "Eww. COOPERATE not 'consummate'!... It's good that you're here 'cause I just thought of something… NO not that!"
The next dress was an avant-garde piece by a foreign koopa featured six arm holes, two trains, and a waste line suspended by suspenders, detailed by flashing jewels and the pattern of a funeral home's curtains. Peach's saving grace, the door clicked open and in came Bowser Junior smiling cheekily.
"King Dad wanted to take some early pictures with the bride." The six year old reached out his arm for Peach so adorable like she almost didn't resist.
"More time for us to make it perfect!" Wendy dragged her little brother out with Peach. "But get her back here soon enough, okay brat?"
Junior stuck his tongue out in return, leading Peach to the bottom of the tower. Questioning soldiers said nothing for good reason with how loud Junior could get if not spoiled rotten. On the ground they found a limousine waiting and Larry rolled down the automatic window all cool like with a chauffeur hat on and all. Toadsworth was already in the back and 'transferring him to the mines' was the excuse Larry used to procure him.
"Get in," he spoke as low as he could. Peach became quietly ecstatic. While trying to not look too comfortable she got in the passenger seat with Junior crawling into the middle between them. She didn't know what to say aside from thanking him again and again. There were other matters she'd have to bring up if a koopaling like him really managed to rescue her but she brushed it aside from then. Toadsworth had a concern or two or three about Larry's help, but again she silenced it. Things should just be normal for five seconds, after all the land was beautiful and vibrant. Larry cruised away from the tower and they were turning heads where ever they rolled in the grass, as there were no streets built yet just pure lush fields. Larry increased speed as he drove by a new fortress build site. Morton handled the blue prints with his remarkable speed reading. One glance and he'd memorized all the details from the size of a bolt to the slab of concrete needed. Lemmy's lazy eye gave him double vision frequently so it made the best choice, but it also meant he spotted two copies of Larry plainly escaping with the princess for triple the heart rate increase and quadruple the urgency to stop it.
"Catch that car!" Lemmy blared.
Zealously their builders including the monty mole controlling the crane abandoned the site to give chase. A huge block of stone swung around and into the wall newly constructed with a crash. The wall adjacent disconnected and mounted on it were the Bowser family chests, heirlooms and treasures. Morton dove forward just as the wall leaned down and caught it so that it didn't crack open the centuries old keepsakes.
"Run ahead! Expediently! Godspeed!" Morton strained under the weight as Lemmy rolled across steep hills becoming larger and more arduous as they went. Larry repeating 'oh crap oh crap oh crap' kept on and Peach held the coat rack to stabilize, fearing how they'd make it all the way across the kingdom with the mob behind them and the car struggling with the incline. Peach didn't know about motors much but she feared that backfire every five seconds wasn't a good sign.
Meanwhile Bowser had the castle's main room decorated with tables and arrangements about 109 percent there (He was never good with fractions). That meant- the Koopa king counted on his claws, only forty-three percent thingys to go before he'd be happy. They installed an ice sculpture of himself and a lava fountain across from each other. He approved until a table clothe caught fire.
"Ahhg! Why didn't I see that coming?!" Bowser exclaimed.
"On it!" Tanner hurled himself on the flames to snuff it out.
Bowser gave a thumbs up. "Great! You always were the best."
Tanner smiled back despite the pain.
"Who's gonna make me this?" Bowser waved around the scrap of paper with his measurements. Fangirl? Are you a qualified seamstress for the King of Dark- I mean Sky Land?" Bowser addressed the toad girl who rose her hand.
"Nope, but I watched a Youtube video once!" Emery held up pins and yarn.
The work kept going until it started getting a little darker outside. Bowser called all his children up and even the princess to see the work so far and he waited, the weather getting worse all the while. Finally the wind could be heard howling through the walls so Bowser stepped outdoors to find everything shady and darkened. He craned his neck to see an object blocking out the sun. "The heck?!"
Right then Roy and Wendy came running up, sending up poofs of clouds with every frantic step. "Daddy! Daddy! That brat Junior didn't bring Peach back!" Wendy screamed.
"And that punk Larry took the our new car!" Roy yelled.
Bowser whipped their way just as a thunder like voice came out of the sky. It seemed like mumbling from a giant. Wind roaring, Bowser and everything around were swept right off of their feet. He only caught, "...CANNOT ESCAPE!"
Back on the ground, Larry continued to flee from the horde as the weather aggravated until he could hardly see. Bowser Junior dropped a banana peel through the sunroof which slipped up Lemmy and caused a small pile up, at least they thought by the amount of grunting in pain they were doing. They burst through a boarder to some other kingdom and the princess could taste the freedom. Toadsworth in the bench seats covered his eyes before noticing the brandy in the drawer. He took a sip, not regretting a thing. Now they were reaching forest with no accompanying path for the car. That didn't stop Larry though, he'd never win backwoods drag races if he paid attention to 'safety'. What stopped him instead was an object causing the limousine bump off of something, hydroplane and then get wedged in a tree tilted upwards. The car shook violently for a minute and then it was over as they only caught a fringe of whatever terrible storm happened. The area around them brightened up. The land was as flat and barren as Dark Land. All of Bowser's minion's work was ruined, the fortress crumbled, the tower was damaged heavily, and in the skies above the castle had taken a brunt of the hit and only the foundation was left in the clouds. Bowser himself was still flailing, his life flashing before his eyes falling from the sky. He curled up defensively until he landed somewhere in Giant Land's forest...
"Larry, what were you doing? This is the most jerk thing you've ever.. Jerked!… I didn't mean it like that! Ugh!" Red faced, Lemmy yanked opened the door on the drivers side. The car was still between two willow trees and all four passengers were fine, aside from their underwear. The surviving members of Bowser's forces surrounded them.
"You will be going with us to find King Dad," Lemmy told them very stern like. Wendy, Roy, and even Morton were there and not happy.
"That's right, shrimp! March!" Roy kicked Larry into the forest. Peach and Toadsworth were detained and the surviving army marched on. They found Bowser easily by first finding his random junk. He'd lost his phone which was now dead, the tie he was getting fitted with, and an extra sign saying 'this land property of Bowser', like a treasure map all leading to a clearance with a small crater marking his spot.
"WHY WERE YOU IN A CAR WITH OUR CAPTIVES DRIVING AWAY?!" Bowser bellowed the moment he came to.
Larry sat on his butt dumbfounded before an explanation that came natural to him slipped out. "I was trying to be a pimp?"
Bowser held his aching head. "Report!"
"Sire we lost everything," a koopa troopa reported.
Then Bowser spotted a part of what was going to be his new tuxedo flowing freely in the wind. Something rung over and over in his mind, the weird talking or voice in the clouds. No he had to have imagined it, so back to square one. Of course… they were already in a fresh new world to pillage…
...
Luigi and Captain Toad were stopped outside the warp pipes in the back of the Mario bros house. The plans (after some bickering) were to go to Sky Land like Morton's note suggested but Mario texted Luigi urgently they were beckoned instead to Southern Mushroom Kingdom once more. Soon the younger Mario brother knew why, a blacked out helicopter had landed in a prairie and moo moos were grazing in the midst of it. A particular barn seemed like a ufo spectacle, a green glow radiating through the windows and in between the wood paneling.
Luigi nervously stepped up. Inside, an X-naut PhD was adjusting a large green tube while four other doctors were crowded at a table. There was also a normal toad, a hammer bro, and a goomba with Mario who spun around when Luigi came in.
"Bro? Perfect. We need all of this stuff for the cure." Mario handed over a list. Luigi held it up and it unfolded many times until it touched the floor. There had to have been nearly a hundred or more ingredients on it...
To be continued.
Created: 6/26/19, 6/27, 6/29, 6/30, 7/1, 7/4, 7/5, 7/7
Edit: 7/26, 7/31, 8/4, 8/30, 8/31, 9/1, 9/13, 9/18, 9/24
12/4/20