-Yux first spotted on moon
-Peanut butter and toe jam sandwiches invented
-Chancellor Toadsworth was born
-In Sarasaland, ancient explorer Zheng Koopa discovered a yellow crystalline noise making artifact. Old World Sarasaland civilization collapsed soon after.

Luigi slid a plate full of steaming pancakes covered in maple syrup across the table to Mario. He’d beaten his brother out of bed by twenty minutes or so for once. The elder plumber rubbed his eyes before accepting the plate and digging in. While they were eating, the radio tuned in to WMUSH first detailed some news about ‘gangs in Toad Town’, then in a talk show section asked the question, ‘Is it better to be relevant or real?’

Luigi slid his empty plate aside. “What were you and the princess talking about last night?”

Mario yawned. “MK East were ran by hacks who thought they were being blackmailed by another hospital, but authorities couldn’t find any evidence of that actually going on, and the two ringleaders of it all were attacked and are in the hospital themselves. Prison hospital... They have no idea who did the attacking.”

“The Case X patients were sent to MK Hospital South, not that that’s doing much. The standard cure for Mushroom Flu doesn’t work.”

Luigi thought for a moment. “So… we absolutely need the cure Bowser is offering then.”

“I don’t know what game Bowser is playing, but he wont’ get away with it.” Mario got up from the table and went in the bedroom, closing the door.

Luigi got up stood outside it, shocked by the outburst. “Mario, you don’t really think Bowser was stringing us along all day, do you?”

Luigi thought about the clues: Bowser WAS the one to point out the tainted soda that belong to him, he did do anything entirely antagonistic while with them when he easily could have done so, and most importantly he ratted out his ‘own’ accomplishes. He wouldn’t call Bowser innocent, but there was certainly more to it all.

Later Mario came out fully dressed and so without much speaking between them, they took the Mach bike over to Peach’s Castle to deal with a Bowser complication for the umpteenth time.

After getting a tip from his police radio, Jelectro Bond arrived at the train yard at 8 am. The sun was low in the sky and dew drops were in the grass, though it sparse in the area. Bond’s Aston Mushroom was given a quick look by the local police before they quickly rushed him.

Bond pretend to seem lost for a moment. “Mon ami, but I own stock here! See that? I just want to check it before it departs.” Bond pointed to a train car on a rail that had, ‘Gold Bars x3’ on it, intentionally using his left arm to point, which had his shiny Rolex Submariner on it. Combined with the fancy car and casual wear of a green Hawaiian shirt, he had the perfect image of a rich but clueless guy.

The toad officer flushed. “I’m so sorry sir! Umm, just stay away from the taped area.”

Bond began to walk towards ‘his’ expensive shipment cart with his attention actually directed a few rails to the left. There was a young koopa officer with a completely white face speaking to a spike detective with a trench coat and hat.

“Go around that train right there if you want to see. It ain’t pretty,” the officer told the spike.

Bond crawled under the locomotive to reach where few other officers and investigators were gathered closely. With his short stature, he had no trouble seeing pass their legs to the body on the ground. It was a goomba engineer with powdery brown skin, eyes dead and wide, and his mouth hung open. Laying only a few inches from his gape was a pink and red bloated looking organ with a trail of bile colored liquid.

“That’s his liver,” A raspy sounding crazee dayzee officer told the detective as he wrote down some notes. “It was squeezed out of him but his body doesn’t have a single bruise on it, aside from maybe when he fell over dead. This will make the tenth homicide just this morning..”

Iggy was walking down the long dark stairway to the lab, listening to the soundtrack of ‘Koopa Ball Z’ on his MP3 player. The mad scientist had gotten the exactly two in a half hours of sleep he always got and felt great. His agenda for the day involved getting his ‘womanizing spray’ formula out of the prototype phase so that maybe he could finally have a girl to take with him to the comic con that was coming to Glitzville where he planned to get his physical copy of ‘Death Streetpass’ signed.

He paused the music to wave when he saw his brother down stairs. “Hey, Luddy-sama. What’s shaking this morning?”

“Unfortunate events,” Ludwig groaned as he twisted a crook out of his back. “I spent all night here and I cannot remember a thing!”

“Never mind, you surely have the backup notes that I always give you, correct? I know you have them. I usually put them under your pillow whilst you are asleep.”

It was no easy feat, but Iggy was weirded out. “Umm… You only told me to contact those people King Dad fired, Slam and Sam, who now work in the video game store ‘Play N Tirade’ by the way. The rest you did all on your own. Also I really don’t think you’ve been in my room recently or you would have commented on my giant Princess Rosalina Queen of Space figurine with removeable-”

“Shh!” Ludwig’s hand covered Iggy’s mouth. “You have just said something slightly not stupid! I did do it on my own, did I not? So independent was I that I failed to mention any of it to Vater.”

“Iggy, you scintillate today! Correct, I followed no usual procedure of mine in anyway, down to the sneaking into your room at night.” Ludwig dug out from his pocket a crumpled yellow note with dozens of ideas written on it. “What is notable here to you?” He removed his hand.

Iggy slid his glasses close to his face. “I see by that faint liquid ring that you used the yellow memo pad that Kamek uses as a drink coaster and that you used that same fountain pen that Morton chewed on one time because it leaks, also you must of been holding the pen too tightly and your arm got tired, because you switched hands halfway through?”

Ludwig ripped the note apart. “Actually the point is, I threw it in the garbage! This Monday, our garbage collector was lingering around with that note and I hardly remember anything since then. In eliminating the impossible, it could only be that he did something to my sense of judgment. Why would I want you to contact former employees of the castle? Why would I use soda? Why would I get out of bed this morning without combing my hair? Come here.”

Ludwig stopped. “Iggy, if you do not direct your attention to greater matters, like fixing this mess, there may not be any females left to be... ugh... attracted to you!”

“Let me rephrase. If you do not wish to help, remember that I control the server with your countless wasted hours of data on it… And your live streams!”

Bowser was finally starting to relax in his hot tub when his bathroom door swung open and all of the steam in the room was sucked out, revealing a certain little tyke.

“Hey pops, look what I made!!!” Bowser Junior wore and army green colored Koopa Scouts uniform with dozens of badges pinned on it. His heavy backpack was still on his shoulders and jutting from it were flags, posters and other knickknacks. It was a miracle he could tote it all and still bounce about the bathroom like he’d consumed a spring mushroom.

Bowser sighed under his breath before trying to look cheery. “You’re back! How was camp, son?”

Junior bum-rushed for the tub holding a glass container. “Look at my ant trooper farm!!! They’re all poisonous, isn’t that cool?!” Leaning over the edge of the tub, Junior pressed the ant farm into Bowser’s face, who gently pushed it back.

“That’s great Junior. Now listen, things went down Friday so we’re going to have to head over to Peach’s place in a little while. Remember her?”

Bowser slapped Junior, making suds splash everywhere before he remembered that Junior was supposed to be the ‘favorite’ of his kids. “Sorry son.” Bowser rubbed the red spot on Junior’s cheek, who quickly jerked away and crossed his arms.

“I know what that blonde bimbo wants and it ain’t you dad! I’m short, not stupid.”

“I agree Vater, that is a sacrilegious venture, besides we all know Junior is both short and stupid!” Ludwig stood in the doorway. Thin perspiration was visible on his forehead.

“Not you too,” Bowser leaned on one of his elbows. “Can’t a koopa have a bath in the morning?”

“Not when Luddy-sama knows my VPN passcode!” Iggy ran inside and tackled Ludwig. When he hit the floor a number of objects few out of his jacket pocket, some makeup, a little glow in the dark stick, shutter sunglasses, a pocket thesaurus, and some portable DJ headphones.

“Ludwig!!! Give me back my ‘Douchebag and Cabana’ powder foundation kit!!” a feminine voice screeched from outside the room.

“If you do not return my miniaturized thesaurus, I will never find out what bigger and better words I can use to impress my new pin pals on Facenote and Instaham! I will be a simpleton, stupid, Leston!”

A buffed out Koopaling crossed their arms. “Listen up, nerd. Give me back my new shades or else. They’re gonna get me all the babes at school!”

“Ludwig, why did you take my glow stick? Now all of my stuffed animals can’t have their sleep over and they’re sad,” someone bouncing on a ball said.

“Yo, I hate all of you. I used Wendy’s credit card to buy those audiophile grade ‘BATES’ by Dr. Greg headphones so they better not be broken.”

Wendy got in Larry’s face. “It was YOU who put that charge on my ‘Masterplan’ card?”

Larry gulped just as the rest of the koopalings started their protests against Ludwig all over again.

“SHUT UP EVERYONE SHUT UP!” Bowser bellowed. “You are making me VERY ANGRY and now my bath is cold. What’s the meaning of this ‘brat’ reunion?”

Ludwig picked himself up from the ground. “You may be wondering why I gathered you all here.”

Roy snorted. “So we could beat up a pompous, supercilious, blue haired freak like you in one convenient location?”

Ludwig got himself together quickly. “Okay, so I was unsuccessful in developing a cure last night and my theory is that my mind was compromised by our renegade garbage collector. By the way, he did not turn in for his shift this morning might I add. I suggest the most rational course of action: request the help of some conveniently hardy mules- I mean, Mario and his associates to help us in the difficult process of obtaining parts of the cure I’ve hidden around the Mushroom Kingdom.”

“Please do not question what my late night sleep deprived self that often sneaks into Iggy’s room is capable of! Besides you cannot hide anything in Dark Land. The lava melts it, duh.” Ludwig shrugged.

Everyone was mumbling and grumbling except for Junior, who had no idea what nonsense he’d came home to.

Mushroom Kingdom Hospital South was an old western style three story building with a hooded porch located at the foot of Mt. Rugged. There were a few cars in the parking and lots of yoshi carriages. Otherwise the area was barren. The wheels of the MKDCU van crawled to a stop in front of the entrance, causing the janitor that was outside mopping the porch to take notice.

“What in tarnation are you doing ‘round here, Billy?” a red shelled koopa troopa janitor with a long gray ponytail and blue smock asked.

Parabilly rolled down the drivers window. “We’re here to make sure you’re not procrastinatin’. Missed a spot there!”

James hopped out of the truck from the passenger side. “So this is that twin brother Probabilly, huh?”

“Yup.” Probabilly dunked the mop inside the bucket. “What brings you all city folk down here?”

“We don’t want to step foot in Toad Town again after what happened..” James answered vaguely. “Anyway, here’s da crew.”

“Yo,” Richard mumbled. He got out of the car with Wiggletron and Sebastian also exiting the back seats.

“Is dis really where they rounded up all the Case X patients? What’s the report?”

Probabilly shrugged at James. “All I know is that I’ve been mopping all day. Once word got out that soda was tainted, folks lost their dern minds pouring it straight out of the cans to the floors, spitting it out, and worse!”

Probabilly went back to work as the MKDCU entered the hospital. The lobby was set up much like a saloon, complete with bar tables and barrels everywhere. Mounted on walls were taxidermy (despite unsettling implications in an anthropomorphic world), empty and dusty glass bottles, random ‘yoshi wrestling’ trophies, and pictures of the staff holding record holding cheep cheeps on fishing docks.

“Howdy ya’ll!” greeted Rou T., the front desk Toad girl. She was young, maybe a freshman in college, and two blonde ponytails stuck out from under her cowboy hat. Her desk consisted of a fold up table with a computer on it and a La-Z-Boy she sat in.

James showed her a badge. “We’re gonna need a full report of the transfer, see?”

She typed a few things into the computer, which had a Mushroom rebel flag set as the background wallpaper. “We have ‘bout fifty folks here from that Case X business, and a few regulars.”

“The medical records from Mushroom Kingdom Hospital East verified there were approximately sixty,” Wiggletron said.

Rou T. typed something else in. “Sorry folks, I forgot! Our head nurse, Sheriff Jr. Troopa, sent a few to the Special World Hospital!”

Sebastian nodded. “And my friend’s cousin’s uncle’s barber got sent there and never came back!!”

“I have studied detailed accounts of their endeavors, and it does not bode well for any patients involved,” Wiggs said gravely.

“Hold it boys,” James said to his crew. He slapped on the desk a help needed advert torn from a newspaper. It promised payment of real gold coins for licensed medical practitioners to help out at the rustic hospital. “Dis still applies?”

Several robotic drones, resembling metallic flying mushrooms with arms, wheeled a hand full of ‘Case X’ Mushroom Flu patients through the metal folding door of the International Medical University of Special World. The red capped toad, suited in a white doctor coat with black pants and his head lamp off centered, that stood off to the side frowned when he realized there were no more than ten to check off the list. He was Drew Louis Diddley PhD, or Dr. Toad, the current president of the hospital.

Junior Troopa, wearing a black cowboy hat, strolled over to him. “Yep. Sure did, partner. Ten. Just like you agreed.”

What was actually agreed were about half of the sixty confirmed cases of Mushroom Flu, if the records at MK East were to be relied upon, but Dr. Toad froze up. Jr. Troopa was just being the brat he always was and he didn’t realize that he needed this opportunity to study Mushroom Flu patients because of its signature ‘coma walking’, Dr. Toad reasoned. (It revitalized areas of the brain even if they were degraded, like what could happen due to old age...or dementia.) His attention was then brought to a taxi pulling up before the hospital, presumably ‘associates’. It wasn’t like there were any other buildings around they could be visiting.

Dr. Toad’s eye twitched. “It’s Doctor Toad, but thanks anyway. I guess this will be enough for both a control and testing group for I and others involved in the project.”

“It’ll be enough alright. Sharing is caring! After all, you ARE just making them comfortable and not doing mad experiments based on some wild theory you got, right?” Jr. Troopa asked, nudging him.

“Good! See ya around!” Jr. Troopa head back to the Southern hospital’s helicopters that were parked in front. They were unmarked so they must have been rentals. Maybe he wasn’t a brat after all if they were willing to rent aircraft for their sake..

Morris, or ‘Professor X-naut’ and his assistant Johnson came up from the taxi, arms filled to the brim with papers and folders.

“Hello, my dear fellow! I hope that I am not late,” Morris said, with the assistant close behind.

Morris turned to Johnson, who nodded. “Oh right! I did not pick up my cousin until thirty minutes ago. Until then he was in his primary school with the phone powered off.”

“I see. You know, this sort of thing wouldn’t happen if I could contact you through your own cellphone.”

“Me owning a cellphone? Good one! That was just as funny as that comedian I saw yesterday…” Morris and the assistant made their way in.

There was nothing more to do than to join them. Dr. Toad shut tight the metal doors and once more the hospital was isolated from the outside world. Dealing with Troopa had tired him out socially and thus he needed coffee. He went down a few hallways on way to his office when something buzzed in his jacket pocket.

“Hello??” There was static in the background. “Drew! I know you said to not call you at work but I need a place to hide. Please..” a lowish kind of dry sounding voice begged.

“Yeah. Listen, I’m kind of banned from Toad Town now and even worse, I just woke up and saw dead people!”

“I know, bro. Don’t ask how he pass, he was just there when I woke up, but he did have this cool cell phone. By the way I’m in a train and I’m hungry and this dead guy only had one stick of gum and five dollars on him,” the voice said matter of factly.

The toad doctor found reason to be relieved, even though no sane person would be. “How much trouble are you in on a scale of one to ten?”

Dr. Toad felt a chill. “Oh… Knock on the left side of the building when you get here. Okay? Bye.” Dr. Toad slipped the phone into his jacket pocket.

“I left my medical bag in your office. I just wanted to catch you before you were whisked away into some board meeting.”

Dr. Toad led him to his private office, locked up very well as he couldn’t stand the idea of people going through his personal things. Inside was sparse with his oak desk, basic chair, a few charts, a file cabinet, and Morris’s ratty bag setting on the desk, which was promptly ignored by its owner.

“You did not tell me you acquired a new painting from Pablo Pizzacaso, the world famous painter and plumber!”

The X-naut PhD’s attention was on a medium sized watercolor featuring two humanoid figures beside each other. The image was split down the middle: the left with a background consisting of black, blue, and purple hues. A figure stood like a silhouette, dark and blending in. The right side had lighter colors, red, orange, and yellow, but the figure was still black like a silhouette. ‘Divided’ was inscribed at the bottom of its red frame.

Dr. Toad felt a sweat coming on. “Oh you mean that. Umm, actually it's mine, or I painted it rather. Yeah, I spent the past week working on it at home. So.. what do you think?”

“It’s kind of personal. But thank you I guess,” Dr. Toad said, meaning it.

Morris turned around with his hands clasped. “Fair enough... Do you ever go out? You hardly leave the hospital and being the new young president does not mean you must live here. Let me check if I have coupons for my other job at Club Gamecube.” Morris picked up his bag and dumped the contents, syringes and other rusty medical tools, on the desk. Dr. Toad winched as it put gashes in the wood.

“Ah!” Morris held up a wrinkly coupon. “Buy one family special and get a free entree.”

“Fine,” Morris grumbled as he stuffed the equipment back in the bag. “I am just trying to help as a friend. It’s unhealthy to stay in all day. Very unhealthy, like the electromagnetic fields from phones, airship chemical trails, and gluten products. Oh, if you ever stop by, we put on shows. This dark boo named ‘Z’ or something, tore the place up with this jokes about Bowser’s Castle and how he could embarrass people on stage with furtive details he already knew about them.”

Morris laughed it off. “Young, a few scars, kind of like a delinquent. Maybe he will stop by again, don’t get so wrapped up!”

Dr. Toad let go and inched back. “Y-you’re right,” he stammered. “Sorry I- Uh... Let me grab some coffee and I’ll meet you in the lab...”

Toadette marked things off on a clipboard. A Bowser attack or not, the castle still had to run itself. With Toad ill and Toadsworth retired, general management fell on the castle manager: namely her. Consequently she got up early and was constantly glancing at clocks and watches and schedule boards and down the halls and up the halls and even at the security cameras facing the castle’s moat to make sure things were running right. Judging by the fact that a small fire broke out, the basement had a slow water leak, and no one even knew where the cleaning supplies were stored, they weren’t.

Deep breaths, Toadette told herself. The Princess late last night gave her permission to invite a trusted intern to help run the place and the ding noise behind her meant that he was right on time. The elevator opened up, complete with white steam pouring out.

“Ready for adventure!” Captain Toad announced. He had a plain and youthful face, suited up with hiking clothes, a red scarf, a large backpack, and a head light. Toadette was familiar with him from a few treasure hunting adventures they’d been on and his rescue missions involving space.

“Hi Ms. Toadette,” he greeted, flashing sparkly white teeth. “I understand you need a brave warrior on the field?”

Captain Toad pointed to his right bicep. “Right here is all we need. That, and I sent them on vacation. May I ask what I need to do?”

Toadette hid the clipboard behind her back. “Let’s see… are you good at putting out fires, general plumbing work, and locating cleaning supplies?”

They went upstairs the very few weekend staff were scarce knowing that Bowser would be showing up. Toadette only saw Buckenberry and Thomas the castle’s front door guard. The guard was off to the side talking looking nervous and Buckenberry was heading right to them.

“Indeed I am! I’m going to keep you all in order during another daring adventure.”

“Oh of course, Ms. Toadette. That I will do,” Captain Toad recovered smoothly.

“-Besides Blue, I knew you and Gold would be busy outside with the Marios when Bowser showed up and then probably off on an adventure or something afterwards. Captain will be gone by the end of the day. Wait, where’s Gold?” Toadette looked around.

Buckenberry lost the defensive stance. “I don’t know, he was still in the bed when I left the apartment. I woke up this early morning and he was blowing chunks in the bathroom.”

Captain Toad faced her. “He could be suffering food poisoning or a virus. Or a mushroom overdose.”

“No one asked you,” Buckenberry said sharply. “Enjoy your indoors adventure, buddy.”

Captain Toad’s face never changed from a wide, if not mischievous, grin. “I will, Mr. Buckenberry. Trust me.”

Just then everyone heard the low roar of a Koopa Airship. It shook the entire castle and cast a shadow over it that could be observed from the front foyer and mezzanine windows. The front door swung open to reveal Luigi’s worried face.

Buckenberry head outside with Toadette (and Captain Toad) keeping a close eye out from the safety of the windows.

Mario and Peach stood right were the moat coming from the castle met the sandy ground. Their hair and clothing blew in the wind as Luigi and his toad companion joined them.

“We’re giving Bowser the big news,” Mario told everyone, his eyes not departing from the airship that steadily drew closer. This one wasn’t the royal koopa family’s typical ride. It looked worse for ware with sour looking wooden boards and lots of squeaks in the air as it made it overhead and landed right near the lake. Yellow dust stir up and emerging from it was King Bowser himself with a black cloak on that flow in the breeze still being generated from his ship.

“Attention Mushroom idiots!! And of course my lovely Princess...” he added at the end in a softer tone. “You remember the ultimatum from last night, right?”

Peach stepped forward to meet the king. “Bowser, let us be brief. You have affected my entire kingdom with your malicious ransom plots and deadly alchemical ways, but we will not play your twisted game. We are hopeful and we trust in the stars. The answer is no.”

Mario readied his fists expecting some sort of conniption. Perhaps Bowser would order an all out attack on the castle right then and there, or he might try to run off with the Princess anyway. Bowser however didn’t have any other battleships with him other than the one he arrived in, and instead of taking one step closer to the Princess, he smiled the same toothy grin Mario saw a lot. Cruel, dangerous, but... like an old vitriolic pal!

“That’s fine then, whatever. I was hoping you’d say that ‘cause I had a change of plans anyway. There was a bit of mix up in the castle so did y'all do good in science class? You see-”

“-Bowser, excuse me, but whatever are you talking about??” Peach interrupted.

“It’s like this, hotness. Even if you gave yourself over to me, which would be great if you did it anyway, just putting that out there, we don’t have the cure ourselves!”

Mario, Peach, Luigi, Buckenberry, and everyone eavesdropping from the castle gasped.

Author Notes: Would you know that I still have surprises in store? Stay tuned and please review.

Originally created: 4/13/18 – 5/19
Rewritten version dates: 5/20/18,- 5/29, 6/17, 7/13, 7/23- 8/6, 8/13, 14, 16
Revamp: 8/23/18, 8/27

-Parts of this (or at least the first drafts) were written during the one year anniversary of Chapter 15 titled ‘New day. New problems’ in “Mario and Bowser Frenemies Forever”. That was not intentional but it was pretty awesome.

-International Medical University of Special World is a slightly non-indicative name but since it directly comes from Mario and Bowser: Frenemies Forever, I didn’t want to change anything.

13. Luigi's Awesomely Ambivalent Allegory

“I was just as surprised as you losers when the brats showed up,” Bowser turned back to his family. “And get your butts up here!”

The rest of the koopalings and Junior quickened their pace to join Bowser and stand around looking flustered, bored, or annoyed. If the toads inside of Peach’s Castle were nervous when Bowser first arrived, they’d be absolutely terrified by the amount of his baddies on the castle grounds at once.

Bowser nodded. “Yup, a rogue in the castle we guess. And nobody’s seen ‘em since.”

Mario stance remained rigid. “I’m sorry, but I’m not understanding why we still shouldn’t whoop all of you koopas right here and now? Even if there was a mix up at the castle, which I don’t really believe, everything that’s gone wrong is still your fault!”

Deafening silence fell on the whole courtyard. Mario was unsure if only he caught it, but there was a flash of hurt on Bowser’s face before returning to a mix of amusement and annoyance.

“I don’t know what else to tell you, plumber. All I wanted was my freaking tennis match and I wouldn’t be getting it if had a scheme right now, would I? We’re asking for your help and don’t think for a moment we’d team up with you idiots if we didn’t think we had to.”

“...He’s right though,” Luigi spoke quietly to his brother but stay behind him, he and everyone else like Mario was the barrier between them and the koopas. “I thought about it and it doesn’t make sense for Bowser to betray us the way he acted, unless he was actually a really good actor… But he isn’t.”

“So it’s settled! I, King Bowser Koopa, the supreme overlord of Dark Land, am offering you mushroom freaks a truce just until we get this whole mess straightened out. But after that it’s back to-”

“-No, not that Junior! I mean we’ll do the usual. Fight, argue, play tennis, etc. Then start all over again when the next game comes out. Deal?” Bowser offered his hand being the sentimental person he- wasn’t! It was a great emotional moment, for five seconds.

Peach came to Mario’s side. “I believe you Bowser. If this was deliberate of you I feel you would not have missed the ample opportunities you had to harm us.”

“No problem, princess. I-” Bowser’s words were cut off when the princess’s dainty hands slapped him in the face.

“-That was for your carelessness and callous disregard for safety! Regardless I, Princess Peach Toadstool, ordained ruler of the Mushroom Kingdom accept your truce.” She gingerly shook his hand and regained her composure. “Well, how shall we proceed?”

Bowser rubbed his stinging cheek while pointing to Ludwig behind him. “Just ask him, he’s the mastermind and all.”

“Yeah. We can talk privately in the garden...” Mario said, walking away ahead of the others.

“Hey, punks,” Roy sneered the moment the coast was clear, “Don’t think we’re gonna be friendly with you chumps!” His siblings joined his protests and turned it into a shouting match right in front of the castle.

Ludwig closed the white garden gate behind him, being the last to enter. His eyes for a moment darted about the garden impressively before snapping back to Mario and the princess standing before the Eternal Star fountain. Bowser impatiently waited with his arms crossed near a rose bush across from them so Ludwig met in the middle.

"I analyzed these samples this morning." Ludwig reached into his pocket and delicately held between his claws a glass slide. "I have conclusively determined by the disease’s structure that we will need a number of molecules to open its disease lock. Are you still following? No??" Ludwig sighed arrogantly. “We can make a cure from scratch easily, but obtaining the components I’ve hidden may be the difficult part considering we are who we are, so it would be very helpful for you all to assist. Simple enough?”

“You issued a death warrant in our Kingdom??” She rolled it back up, looking very displeased.

“Erm, yeah,” Bowser said. “Standard protocol in Dark Land for an attack on royalty. Yeah, it’s a stretch since he didn’t attack anyone directly, but don’t ya think somehow convincing Dark Land’s commander in chief, that’s my brat Ludwig, to do whatever crazy thing he did- I still don’t understand it really, counts?”

“Well I do want him exterminated, even if I do not understand what Vater is talking about.”

Mario took off his hat to wipe some sweat off his forehead. This was already a hot day. “What do we need to find?”

Ludwig scratched his chin. “There is a sample of stardust, a mega vitamin, a boom shroom, and Yoshi fruit. I have a general idea of the location but no specifics assuming they are still there. It was a week ago when they were planted.”

“We will do this because the stars will be with us!” Peach said, beaming with determination and hope.

Mario, without words, held out his hand. After a pause, a yellow scaly hand met a white gloved one in a firm shake. “This is to your stars that guide your kingdom,” Ludwig said with sincerity. “After all, we must try. Just know that our motley crew have officially started the scavenger hunt.”

Bowser turned his attention to Ludwig. “Great. Now, you go back around first and wrangle our people up. I got things to discuss with these two. So just this morning I got a message and...”

Their words trailed off as Ludwig excused himself from the garden. The diplomat came back to the front castle courtyard to find everyone standing in a single file line in some some arbitrary order. Luigi and Iggy were at the front, a disgruntled Buckenberry and Bowser Junior in the very back, and everyone else in between. Off of the side, Toadette waved.

He hummed as he reconnoitered. “It is Prince Ludwig to you, Ms. Toadette, but no matter. Wendy, Larry, and Roy can quickly travel and get the Yoshi fruit. Forgive me, but that is the only object I did not remove from it’s native location. Besides, their passports have not yet expired as I recall. Buckenberry can keep Lemmy and Morton in check while they search the mega department store where the vitamin approximately is. Iggy can get the stardust hidden in Toad Town. He has a mineral analyzing machine and knows the city because he visits the comic shops alot. I will work with Luigi Mario to procure the Boom Shroom that I believe is located somewhere in a forest, and he has experience with things colored green so-”

Ludwig shrugged as he passed her by. “Does it matter Ms. Toadette? It happened off screen anyway. Now Luigi, are you ready to depart?”

“Mario, Peach, Junior, and I have to go somewhere. I know it ain’t like me but I don’t have time to argue. Go on!” Bowser roared.

Mario run up to Luigi and pat him on the back. “Stay safe. You know how spotty communication can be when out of the kingdom, so I’m making you the leader of this cure making expedition. Oh and can you check out what Dr. Toadley wanted to show me?”

Mario shook his head. “You know how I kept saying yesterday didn’t feel right? I woke up this morning and honestly, I feel even worse about today. Interpret that how you want. Bye.”

Luigi saw everyone scrambling about with apprehension. Now they were going to work with not only Bowser but his family too? And with two key heroes, Yoshi and Alagold, being absent??

Ludwig called him over to a Parade Kart stashed in the Airship’s loading bay, and they were off into Toad Town. The koopaling traversed the streets somewhat like an angry senior citizen, honking constantly at people zooming past him at the normal speed limit. They were in the East side of the city and Luigi got a good look at a sort of ‘gang’ all wearing denim jackets with white t-shirts under for the guys, and old school dresses for the girls. Luigi hated ignoring it for other matters but that’s the way things were. Soon they arrived at the Toadley Clinic, a plain building modeled after a mushroom.

Luigi got out first. “Umm, thanks. I didn’t think you overheard what Mario said. Do you drive all of the time?”

The Toadley Clinic was empty except for a pink spotted toad at the desk. She sat her magazine down at the sight of them.

Mary the intern disappeared behind the lab’s double doors. Suddenly screaming and clattering and ruckus came from back there in one discordant jumble. The green plumber and koopa prince were subconsciously inching closer to each other, so much so that their shoulders brushed after the second explosion sound.

The double doors burst open and Dr. Toadley emerged along with Birdley squawking in alarm. Toadley’s normally purple garb was blackened but his thick eyebrows were raised in amusement.

“Am I? Not at all!” Dr. Toadley fell forward stiff as a board, prompting them to rush to his aid.

Ludwig quickly checked the doctor’s pulse. “I see no sign of lasting damage, except that he has become insane!”

“You guys will probably want to check this out,” Mary said reentering the lobby.

“S-should you examine the results of my Miracle Toadley Cure? Yes...you..should!” Dr. Toadley added.

The human and koopa duo cautiously entered the lab with their attention first being brought to equipment, tables, chairs, and more being thrown and tossed about, some even on fire. Luigi saw hunks of junk, but Ludwig recognized the remnants of sophisticated computers. The next thing however made then freeze in place. Toad and Daisy where on the other side of the lab awake. Toad had a wide smile, only his skin looked a little patchy and red. Daisy also had reddish patches on her normally olive colored skin, that and she was standing upside down on her head.

“Hey you two! What Toad meant was, he’s glad to see you. Tell the doc I’m sorry I kind of wrecked the place. I was spinning like a top a moment ago.”

Luigi ran up to Daisy for a hug. “You had no idea how much we all worried. Uh, are you getting your handstand exercise in?”

The brunette smiled, or frowned because she was upside down. “Nope, I can’t help it. That’s the other thing Weegee. Whatever Dr. Toadley did to us was kind of weird. I mean, I’m glad to be awake but, yeah, we ain’t exactly normal.”

Ludwig shoved Luigi aside to get an even closer look. “How can you have a rash when NOT having a rash is a distinct symptom of MF?”

Ludwig stood his ground, the two glaring at each other. “Do you understand why Mushroom Kingdom Hospital South cannot cure anyone with Dr. Mario’s Megavitamins? The Mushroom Flu strand that we had in our lab mutated, I knew that, but I see now that there could be more complications to it. Do you follow?”

“Yeah, sure,” Luigi grumbled. He turned to Toad and Daisy. “I’ll call to the castle to get you guys picked up. I’m sure you don’t want to hang in this place, considering that computer over there is on fire.”

“Actually I’d rather stay. I did tear the place apart so it’s only right I help clean. I’m full of energy anyway! YEEEAH DAISY!” Daisy did a somersault over to the engulfed computer monitor and stomped out the flames. All that was left was a smoking pile of plastic and electronics. “Good as new!”

Ludwig ran over to it and tried to savage a microchip. “You just destroyed a very expensive-” He sighed and shook his head.

“(I’ll take a ride, homeboys. The castle probably needs me),” Toad said. “(Also has anyone seen my megaphone?)”

Later she was staring out of her window watching cars pass by and thinking over her venturesome plans for the day when Emery’s Koopa King cart stopped by. The young nurse agreed to drive Kylie to MK South hospital to check on Mitch, as she was out of a job anyway and mother was in prison. The dire situation never came up in the girls tone however, so Kylie accepted. When they arrived to the hospital near Mt. Rugged things seemed calm from the outside and they parked not far from a colorfully painted van abandoned in near the front porch.

Inside seated were a few people in the reception area all drinking water or tea due to the soda shortage. While Emery sat around, Kylie got the attention of the desk lady. “Ma’am, I’m looking for Mitch Jamerson Toadstool.”

Rou T. typed stuff on the computer. “Room 226. Make sure you don’t stumble into any rooms below that number. We’ve had all kinds of ruckus from the MF patients. You take care, hear?”

Kylie slowly pushed opened the door marked 226. The room was quiet save for occasional beeps from machinery and a green capped Toad lie in bed with a number of equipment hooked up, monitors, IVs, and even an oxygen mask. Kylie felt her eyes become watery as she stood at the edge of Mitch’s bed for a moment, laying a hand on his.

“Mitch, I know we both made mistakes. I’m just sorry for never forgiving you before, and I will hold back nothing until I avenge you.” There was so much more she wanted to say, but the words could never come out.

Kylie discreetly wiped her face before turning towards her friend. “Sure. Here I come, sis...”

They went back down the hall into the saloon/lobby area and sat on some benches. Kylie didn’t notice when she first came in, but now she kind of liked the décor that most might consider kitschy. For instance, above where they sat was a large imposing stuffed Dino Rhino head mounted on the wall.

“I snatched this crazy thing from a wall.” Emery showed her a crumpled ‘WANTED’ poster of Zoo issued by Ludwig. It promised a reward of a ridiculous amount of coins, so much Kylie wondered if Bowser even had that much in his bank, unless his eldest son was holding out.

“As if I didn’t have enough of a reason to hunt Zoo down. Remember when I told you about that on the phone? He’s the one who hurt Mitch-”

“Oh look it’s that celebrity, Kylie!” Sebastian said, walking up to the girls.

Kylie almost didn’t recognize her snifit ‘fan’. “Still the wrong Kylie, brother. But where’s the rest of your gang?”

“We’re all stuck here doing random stuff like sedating Mushroom Flu victims!”

Emery looked at him funny. “Weren’t we classmates in health class? Yeah, you locked everyone in the community college because it was raining hard one day and you didn’t think it was nice to go outside while the sky was crying so much.”

Kylie slid her contact card to him slowly. Sebastian in turn gave her his number on a rainbow sticky note and disappeared as quick as he showed up.

Emery’s bottom lip quivered. “But, but can’t I come along? You need me to drive you around and I’m going to be soooo lonely!”

“Sis, are you sure? Come on, your mom’s at a prison hospital. I think you should chill.” Kylie thought she was making sense.

“And do what? She’s doing okay, I called this morning and besides, she put herself there by helping out that Doctor Professor guy. Gosh, I thought you’d understand!”

“I do!” Kylie replied vehemently, detecting some bitterness in the tone of her friend. “But I’m about to deal with some crazy crap. I just care about you and this is no joke.”

“I know it’s not and I won’t get in the way, okay? Let me prove I can help you by this.” Emery got out of her seat and bow dramatically in the middle of the lobby with her eyes shut and hands clasp together. There was a flash in the room as a light descended from the ceiling and landed right in front of the two girls. Rou T. rolled over the counter with a shotgun in hand.

“Oh, excuse me hun. You take care, hear?” Rou T. put the firearm away and strutted back to her front desk. Others in the lobby that were attracted to the attention began to ignore them too.

“Wow... he actually made it.” Emery got up looking coy all of a sudden. “Hey, ♡♪!? “

Kylie blinked a few times at the sight of the blue clothed doll with a price tag hanging from one of his arms. “Either a few screws are loose in my noggin or this is a prank and y’all saps got me good!”

“No, and no. I just stop here sometimes. It has character. What’s going on?”

“Call me Geno, and I’d be glad to help. That hasn’t been action up in the heavens in too long.”

Kylie started to pack her stuff up. “Thanks a bunch. You a fan of thrifting too, brother?" she asked, seeing the price on his tag.

Geno shook his head. "To be honest I lost track of Geno while up in Star Haven. I realized today that Gaz, the owner of 'Geno' grew up and gave it away to an expensive collector. I sure they won’t mind me borrowing it.” He produced a semi automatic super scope out of nowhere and tossed it to Emery while holding a star rod for himself. “Where are we going?”

“I wanted to check out so and so first. I’m trying to find out where Zoo might be hiding out since he gotta be keeping distance from Bowser. Thing is, we need to travel places fast.”

Geno snapped his fingers and in another blinding flash a Shooting Star kart appeared right in the lobby. Kylie and Emery got in the back seats as Geno drove. They zoomed straight through the wooden swing doors, leaving marks all over the hardwood floor and shaking things off the walls. Rou T. started screaming at them but the trio were already on the dirt roads of Mt. Rugged by then.

“Dad gummit, I just cleaned here!” Probabilly, who entered the lobby a moment after, threw his bucket and mop down.

Kylie, Emery, and Geno walked up to the Donut Plains Juvenile Detention Center, or rather Geno came near the door, and Kylie and Emery tumbled inside because their insides were turned upside down by the Shooting Star’s light speed travel. The upside to having their stomach rush to their brains was that they'd went from the Mushroom Kingdom to Donut Plains in thirty minutes. Kylie and Emery approached the front desk person while Geno stayed outside the door and told them to move on while his gaze was directed towards the sky for some reason, specifically where there was a black ‘dot’.

"Howdy. Do y’all have records that go back to the 90s? We’re wondering about a Zoo Diddley admitted here as a child.”

The chubby super koopa with pink perception glasses and a grey sweater, smiled sweetly. “I’m afraid to inform you that we don’t publicly release mental health records.”

"The one that was shut down last night? Poor girl.. I still can’t do much unless you have referrals.” Her phone rung. “Excuse me.” She picked it up and quickly pressed a button behind the desk.

Two doors swung open and out came a hammer brother busily checking the pockets of his colorful tie dye doctor’s coat. “You know how I'm always forgetting stuff in my shell. They get on me about it all the time at my other office. Ah!” He produced a card key from a pocket. “Go on and have your lunch break. I’ll hold down the front desk.”

“Thanks Dr. Topper,” the receptionist said. She grabbed her purse and went back through the doors he came from.

Dr. Topper turned to Kylie with a kind face. He had an air of grandfatherly maturity, though Kylie suspected based on the Pac-Man tattoo he had on his arm that he was probably 30 to 40ish in reality like her. “Why hello, ladies. I’m guessing you’re here for the shy little man back there?” he asked, referring to Geno who’d entered a moment earlier.

Emery dropped to her knees. “Please please please! He’s just so bad, we can’t handle it anymore!”

Geno stepped up and flashed a shiny little dagger. “Of course. Only the baddest,” he hissed.

Dr. Topper smiled. “That’s great. There are no lost souls here.. How old is he? Is he in in school?”

Dr. Topper jotted something down on a memo pad. “Where do you all come from by the way?”

“Out of town,” Kylie said. “So we really need to make sure this is the right place for.. ‘Beano’.”

Topper glanced at his watch. “Why don’t I show you all around and explain our juvenile behavior program?”

And so they followed the hammer bro in the doors. The room they were in next was basketball court size and had lots of tables with young people setting at them and a few TVs showing some kind of educational program. It would resemble a typical youth recreation center if not for the orange jumpsuits everyone wore.

“Completely, as long as he puts that knife away. Now if you would follow me..”

Geno, now without the knife, was left in the room while Dr. Topper took Kylie and Emery out of some doors on the other side. Geno looked around, there were kids of all ages moping around with the distinct air of how kids might behave while waiting around in detention. At least that’s how Geno thought things still worked; it had been a few millennium since he was in school.

He sat at a table with several yoshi kids watching Rex the Friendly Dino from a television stand at the end.

“OMG THE TOYS ARE HERE!” another kid at the table screamed. This made everyone in the entire room turn to Geno.

The purple yoshi gave Geno a closer look. “Hey, I see that price tag. Darcy’s right, this must be one of those new high-tech talking models.”

Meanwhile, Kylie and Emery were brought to an office where they spoke for a bit and stalled on filling out the paperwork laying before them. Kylie played with the ballpoint pen in her hands.

“Say doc, that’s some really good info. Last question, what would you do if a child could bring the Dark Star to Earth?”

Kylie shot up from her seat. “-Because that’s what Zoo Diddley did about fourteen years ago!”

“Nope, brother. I’m Kylie Koopa the reporter and I’m doing a criminal investigation.”

Just then the alarm went off. Dr. Topper leaned over to pressed a button to the side of him. “Yes? What happened?”

“All of the kids in the game room have lost their minds over a random toy someone smuggled in! Come quick doctor!” it said.

Dr. Topper traded a confused look for a serious one. “I’ll deal with you practical jokers later. Move aside.” He brushed past them and rushed out.

Kylie turned to Emery. “Who would bring a random ‘toy’ into a place like this? Wait a minute…”

Back in the room the purple yoshi laughed as the yellow disc spun them around many times before fading out of existence. Another kid, this time a rex, begged for it to be their turn next.

“Hold on tight now.” Geno performed another Geno Whirl of the harmless variety for the next kid. Many children stood in line for a turn, the TVs and other games in the room long forgotten. Dr. Topper marched right in the middle of them and picked Geno up.

“Ooh ooh yeah. He spun me on his spinny disky thingy!” said a little thwimp.

Dr. Topper tried to find a name tag. “Kids, you know you can’t bring outside toys here, but if you really like whatever this is, maybe we can get one approved. Hmm, he seems so familiar. Alright, be good if you want to take a trip later today.” When Dr. Topper brought Geno with him to the front desk again, Geno sprung to life and hopped out of his arms.

“Oh, thank you doll thing that talks… and knows my name. What kind of batteries do you run on?”

“But I thought that was the plan all along?” Geno held up a folder. “You know, you distract the doctor while I get these?”

Kylie opened the folder. It contained a detailed profile of Zoo from years eight to twelve. “Yoiks! How did you spy around the place? I thought the kids had ya stuck there.”

“While entertaining them, I was not 'stuck’. They are very nicely trained by the way and it would have been a great place for ‘Beano’, but I digress. I can be anywhere I need to be,” Geno said, not bothering to elaborate. “Now hop in. I need to drop you guys back off.”

Geno gave her a thumbs up. “Oh that file has everything you need and I needed. Emery, you can keep that super scope btw.”

Author note: TOAD AND DAISY ARE BACK!!! Yes, they never woke up before the epilogue in the original Frenemies Forever and yet there is more coming. Remember the original summary?? (Check chapter 1) things will go farther than before!

Originally created: 4/19/18 – 5/19
Rewritten version: 5/21/18, 5/30, 6/19, 7/18, 7/23, 29, 8/5,6
Revamp: 8/23/18, 8/29

- ‘Boom Shroom’ item is a tribute to one of my favorite writers and the first person I got into the Mario Fanfiction fandom from when first joining FF dot net.

14. Friends Family and ‘Associates’

April 4, 2016 Southern Mushroom Kingdom Hospital report: Howdy. This is a formal (well not really) letter to the Mushroom Kingdom service board. Another nurse was attacked and this time his arm was permanently twisted out of it's socket. I currently go to high school with him as a junior and the poor guy played sports. Ten our of patients we can’t keep stable, but at least they aren't ‘coma walking’ and attacking everything that moves. As for the aggros like the ones that took my friend out, we’re going to have to restrain them like MK East. We’re used to Yoshi wrangling so this should work. I'm so glad I only gave the Special World Hospital ten patients. No telling how those other lunatics would handle this, especially Dr. Toad. Guy has skeletons in his closet. Fresh ones.

-Jr 'Can't write formally if his life depended on it' Troopa, the best nurse around.

Jelectro Bond was on the roof of a diner in East Toad Town. Standing near the streets and entering the building were people wearing blue denim jackets, blue vintage dresses, and blue shoes. It was wear a certain color day, and he’d had missed the memo. The beaming sun was already hot and put a glare on the radio’s screen, constantly blaring the reports of the local law enforcement, some mundane others not. While only seeing one up close he’d learned that there were eleven victims of the ‘Railway Killer’, as one more was found after the goomba. He had a theory in mind: Since half of them did have some slight but nonfatal physical trauma before dying by internal damage, the perpetrator could have use that ‘death ray’ as a last resort. Combined with the common theme of mass transport someone or something wanted to get out of the Kingdom fast and without too much attention. Bond closed the laptop and was preparing to climb off the building’s roof to join society again as a so called civilian. He’d just report this to his agency and they were surely-

Don’t do that, his heart said. A sinking feeling deep within said that this was actually part of something bigger than he could ever imagine. Instead of stopping at the portal to Super Spy HQ hidden in Toad Town, his next stop was instead...

After arranging for Toad to be sent to Peach’s castle by Captain Toad picking him up (Daisy insisted she stay at the clinic), it was back to business. The sparkling gold Parade Kart driven by Ludwig attracted much attention while cruising down the streets of Toad Town where the average person could barely afford to not use public transportation, let alone an older gas guzzler. Girls even took pictures while they were at red lights, gushing over Ludwig, (Luigi guessed they saw his blue jacket and got confused since they were still on the East side of Toad Town with all the denim jacket greasers), but also Luigi (so it wasn’t all bad).

The car stopped right before the entrance of Forever Forest. Already the ‘locals’ were rustling in the thick green foliage. Luigi suppressed a shiver.

“May I remind you that time is not an infinite resource, plumber.” Ludwig checked his old looking wristwatch.

Luigi hopped out. "I have one like that too.” Luigi rolled up his sleeve to show off his own vintage time keeping piece.

“Thanks, but I’m sure yours gets the most praise, especially from the ladies with you being a prince and all."

Ludwig only mumbled in reply as Luigi began to lean on a sign post warning visitors to not get lost.

“We should mark our trail. I know mushrooms and you can get spun around hunting for them."

Ludwig scoffed and continued through the forest gates without Luigi. "Reiterating your credentials is superfluous. I even have credits in Koopilius Kesler's Florilegium: The Book of Plants!" The koopaling’s voice grew faint.

Luigi entered the forest where the thick canopy made everything dim, belying the fact that it was only late noon. “That was not nice!”

But Luigi could not find where "this" was. As he called Ludwig’s name he could feel the various creatures in the bushes watching his every move, just waiting for him to make a misstep and become another victim of the forest. Luigi strained his eyes to find any sign of Ludwig on or off the path. Then, some distance into the forest, leaves crunched and right after his ears rung when a bang went off to his left. Woodland animals shrieked, cooed, and howled in reply, the noises collectively coming from all around.

Luigi braced himself and ran through a large shrub to investigate. On the other side was Ludwig aiming his zapper at a horde of green fuzzies, with a scorched black mark on the ground between them. At the sight of Luigi the hoard scurried back into the greenery, apparently finding the fight not worth it anymore.

Luigi grabbed him tightly. “I was so worried!! You could have gotten lost and never found again, or those things could have eaten you alive!!!”

"Very well. I will do so." Ludwig's expression remained flat as they marched back to the path, but he kept close to Luigi's heels and every twig snap made his hand hover over the zapper holster.

There were many atypical plants to be found in the forest, but none had the peculiar yellow and black color palette of a boom shroom. Luigi knew of a residential clearing up ahead where they could inquire of locals and even safely split up for a moment. After all, he had the faintest idea that maybe Ludwig wasn't used to working with others, but it was just a hunch...

“People call me stupid koopa,
They just jealous of my chains
I got the sickest beats in Dark Land,
Haters get hanged!”

Larry’s fist knocked against the subway windows in beat with his ‘rap.’ He and his siblings were heading to the harbor to catch a ride to Yoshi’s Island for some authentic Yoshi berries (and for Wendy to take some exotic Instaham photos).

“Yo, chill out. What else we gonna do? King Dad took our cellphones, remember?”

Roy crossed his arms. He sat across from Larry with Wendy beside him, their sister being engrossed with her cellphone that wasn’t taken away because she was daddy’s girl. “Fair point. Huh. Hey, I hear Junior got a girlfriend.”

“He do?! Why, that little brat...” Talk about embarrassing he thought, but it could be worse. Larry was only 15. At least he wasn’t like Ludwig who was 23 and had never had a girlfriend.

“That’s so cruddy…” Larry mumbled. “Earth to ugly hag over there, wake up!”

Wendy threw a small tantrum. “NOOO! Raven sided with the ‘Chucksters’ and that’s totes traitorous,” she thought out loud.

Roy turned to her. “You mean those wimps we saw walking around with the denim jackets?!”

Everyone felt the subway slowing down. Outside the window was completely dark like all of the lights in the subway tunnel were out.

Wendy had her nose in the air. “Maybe it wants to be black, Larry. Is anything wrong with that?”

"Subway 101, Toad Town to Surfshine Harbor, attention," the automated intercom said. "There will be delays in departing. Thank you for your cooperation."

"Aww shell!” Roy said. “We sit in this stupid train all day and now we gotta wait to get off?"

“Like, my gosh. We’re royalty and we don’t have to stand for this. I'm complaining to the staff." Wendy got up after dusting the crumbs from her lap, (they briefly got something to eat before boarding the subway at a diner that happened to be controlled by the 'Chucksters', so they had to endure denim jackets, rockabilly music, and tall hair for about thirty minutes), and head for the door heading to the next car.

She waved a hand sassily at Larry. "We don't have all day, sugar. I'm sure if I offered them some of this bling-" Wendy flashed a gold chain hidden in her purse. "Get what I'm saying?"

Larry couldn’t believe he was now being outdone by his big sister who actually owned chains as opposed to just rapping about them.

"Alright sis. I'll knock some heads together if they get fresh." Roy got up and joined her. They were leaving when Larry jumped up.

The koopalings passed a few cars to get to the front of this particularly short and mostly unoccupied subway, so they only got stared at oddly once or twice. Roy would always shake a fist and they’d knock it off real quick.

“Halt,” said the orange Yoshi attendant guarding the next door. “You're not allowed past here.”

Roy used the fist shake technique, but the attendant flashed a sharp looking katana and Roy was the one who knocked it off real quick.

“Aaaaahhhh they're breaking the glass!!!” screamed someone inside the doors behind him.

The attendant whipped around and pushed open the next door only to let a few black creatures who were pressing against it spill out. They were flat and fuzzy with yellow oval eyes in the center. The attendant realized his error and shut the door just a moment too late, so everyone dodged back.

Roy slid the sunglasses down again for a better look. “What the shell are those freaks??”

The yoshi sliced at them to little avail as the paper thin monsters continued to slide through the gap in the door.

The attendant pushed everyone out to lock himself in with the smorgs. While his siblings scrambled away Larry tripped on his toes, feeling something brush against them at the same time. In his panic, firecrackers he had in his pockets that he used to pelt the vehicles of people he didn’t like in high school fell to the ground and exploded, making purple, green, and blue flash in the car like a strobe light at a party. By the time the smoke cleared, the smorgs that had gotten through were reduced to black piles of ash on the floor. Small successes, except more of them were coming and they didn’t seem happy. With a squeal he hoped no one heard, Larry finally joined everyone else in the farthest car back. When he got in, Roy and a Thwomp passenger in a business suit leaned against the door right away.

“Where were you?? They can slip through the gaps any moment!” Wendy stood on her seat like one would to avoid a little mouser in the kitchen.

Larry frantically dug into his backpack.“Guys, we can roast these losers. I got… exactly one more... Dang! Now I remember that I cleaned out this backpack to make room for Iggy’s womanizing spray prototype- I mean my own manly musk!”

Larry beat a fist to his chest. “Not just yet. Let a real Koopa man handle this like- Ahhhh watch out!!”

Some of the smorg slid under the door, piling up at the feet of Roy and the thwomp before flipping themselves upward to attack. Larry tossed the last firecracker like a grenade and heroically saved both his brother and a random passenger. No, actually the firecracker slipped from his claws while he screamed like a girl and the entire fireworks show went off at his own feet, disorienting everyone in the car. The first thing Larry saw as the world faded back into view were ashes everywhere and a big open window to his right that someone pried open. Roy broke him out of his daze by reaching in and yanking him out onto the hard concrete outside. They were at the harbor.

“We told you to move instead of standing there when I opened that window, stupid!”

Larry would have had some choice words for his brother was he not struck by the sight of the entire Toad Town 101 subway train being covered in smorgs.

“Let’s get out of here before this commotion delays our ship,” Wendy said, checking her phone for the time.

“I’m sorry to inform you that it has. The Sarasaland government has restricted all import and export with the Mushroom Kingdom,” the officer told them once they’d entered the registration office that was a short walk away.

“They can’t do that!” Larry said. “Uh, is what I WOULD say if I paid attention in government class…. Which I don’t!”

Wendy winked at her brothers and pulled out the gold chain again. The bandit officer then showed them his chain, which was bigger, more gold, and fancier than Wendy’s.

Larry pound his fist in his hand. “We need to group up, yo. Wish I had my scepter.”

The officer interrupted Roy by clearing his throat loudly. “You realize that I’m still here, right?...”

“Hey, lay off! I deserve to get a call don’t I?” a green dinosaur named T. Yoshisaur, also known as Yoshi, said around the corner as a doogan and toad officer escorted him. Yoshi was left at a payphone where he dropped his bag to the ground with a sour look.

Larry left his brother and sister with the officer at the desk, and stood around where Yoshi was.

“..Yeah Birdo, I might be away for a little while. Love you, bye.” Yoshi hung up and jumped a little. “Larry?? What are you doing here?”

“Don’t you know about that truce with my homies and your homies? You missed the show.”

He laughed bitterly. “I sure did, you know, hiding myself on a cheep cheep fishing boat because they won't let anyone from Yoshi's island, or any other country visit the Mushroom Kingdom!”

“And I would have gotten away with it, had those alien things not attacked and made all of the sailors check their ships.”

Larry almost showed some sympathy before he caught himself. “I got a plan,” he said as cool as he could. He saw his brother and sister and everyone else not in the office anymore.“Why don’t you escape with us and we head to the castle? You got the berries we need for the Mushroom Flu cure in your backpack and I’ll explain the rest on the way.”

Yoshi smiled. “You'd really help me out? Umm.. how did you know I brought berries?”

“I rummaged through your stuff while you wasn't- I mean, just a guess! Here, wear this.”

Yoshi put on Larry’s large blingy gangster ball cap and tilted it down to cover his eyes. For the first time Larry could notice how nice Surfshine Harbor was outside, with it's deep blue ocean, sandy shore, old school beach houses, and absolute tranquility, save for an odd low rumble in the background.

Yoshi froze in this tracks and Larry bumped into him before seeing what he was seeing. Back near the subway station, Toad Town 101 had transformed into a half machine half organic ‘thing’ that stood upright. The five subway cars where joined together by a center mass of smorg and entrapped people. Among the monsters where the a passengers, officers, sailors, Roy, and Wendy. The five subway cars, now black instead of the silver color they previously were, stuck out to make a five pointed shape, ostensibly like a star. A dark star.

“We went outside and they spread everywhere!” Wendy screamed. “Could you totes help us right now?!?”

The middle portion then pulled its victims inside of it where they were no longer in view. Yoshi looked from side to side, but saw no other soul anywhere, not on sidewalks or on the streets. Surfshine harbor had become ghost town harbor.

Yoshi faced Larry. “I don’t know what this thing is but let’s ‘totes’ help them, to quote your sister.”

Yoshi looked at his attacks: flutter, stampede, and egg. His special attack was ‘wisdom’.

Larry had: Rap, shank, wand (greyed out), and ‘closeted book nerd’ as a special attack.

Yoshi tossed some eggs at the smorg, but didn’t even put a dent on the subway cars the 100 foot monster was made up..

Larry pulled out his smartphone and flicked through a few web pages until he found the info he needed. He paraphrased: “That’s a ‘Smorg’ and they all gather up and junk to make a bigger monster like a gang bang or something. Max Hp ??? Huh, this one must be special like the Armored Harriers. Attack is 500 though, wtf? Defense 1 like normal. Attacks with tentacles like Iggy’s weird cartoons. Yeah, we should probably kill this thing quick…”

Now it was the smorg’s turn. It fell on top of Yoshi and Larry with the center part hitting them directly. Immediately Larry felt like he was drowning in some kind of slick papery material and flailed, feeling nothing at all, until his hand brushed something smooth like a necklace.

Roy had to slide his sunglasses up his face. “Well I’m here I think and I’m upside down!”

“Oh noooo. I want my mommy- I mean MONEY.. because I loaned some out and uh-“

“I’m an attendant,” the Toad attendant, also called ‘Larry’ said, “and these things appeared out of nowhere and burst through the glass.”

Yoshi ate a bulb berry from the bag he had on him, recognizing the fruit he wanted by smell. The dragon’s green skin turned yellow and his entire body emitted a bright warm color that revealed the koopalings, the attendant, and others off in the distance. They were all floating in a dark void while a distant roar could be heard from somewhere near yet far. Roy was floating and spinning around in place. Wendy was stationary while upside down, which is how the golden chain fell out of her bag. Larry was upright and still had the chain and Yoshi and the attendant were on their side. People in the distance were in random orientations.

“Whatever this is, we need to burn it. Too bad we just happen to be some of the non fire breathers,” Larry the koopaling said.

Yoshi pinched between his eyes before facing everyone. “Listen up. Give me that flashlight, something reflective, something that can chain things together, and something protective you can put on your hand.”

Larry the attendant tossed his flashlight to discover that the void had moon-like physics. Wendy tossed one of her million mirrors. Roy gave up some super large brass knuckles, while resisting the urge to hurl. Larry Koopa gave up the gold chain after one more longing glance and the last thing floated over to the glowing dinosaur. He combined those items with a zapper mini that was in his bag. This surprised everyone but Larry Koopa, who’d been through his nap sack anyway (and snatched twenty coins while at it.) The extra batteries from the flashlight added power to the zapper and the chain held the mirror right in front of the barrel. Lastly he put on the brass glove and aimed the modified weapon in a direction that wasn’t pointing at anyone.

“The mirror will cause the laser to rebound in the barrel like a freaking bomb. Don’t worry, I’m a professional crazy dinosaur. Ready?”

“No!” Everyone, even those floating around a distance away collectively shouted.

In a blinding flash the small flame from the zapper spread everywhere, like the air inside the void was flammable. As the creature collapsed on itself, Larry thought his skin was going to melt off, but that didn’t even compare to the deafening cry of agony from the monster. The rumbling shook him to the bones as the rift between the regular world and their dimensional imprisonment was shattered. As if that was all a bad dream, the next thing he remembered was twenty or so people including his siblings and Yoshi right back at the Surfshine Harbor subway station amid piles and piles of black ashes. The pieces of the subway were tossed about like a toddler playing rough with toys.

Yoshi was shaking and blowing on his right hand with the metal glove off to the side glowing red. He moved his mouth but no words came out. Larry for a moment feared he was deaf before he heard the regular sounds of the city behind him. Cars driving. People walking. All of it had appeared out of nowhere and the harbor was back to life.

The four stumbled away from the scene and jumped into the closest Mushroom Bus on route to Royal Raceway, white as a Boo. Their narcosis disposition matched everyone else involved, so much so that the evening news report would be unable to cover the incident properly, especially with there being mysteriously, improbably, no outside eye witnesses. Channel 64, somewhat annoyed, had to put yet another curious incident down as an ‘Act of Eldstar’. The overhead shot of the ashes shaped like a star were a conversation starter however.

So everyone on the task of getting cure ingredients were long gone except for Iggy, because he needed bathroom breaks inside. And snacks. And he goofed for a while. But eventually he was back in front of the castle just in time for a yellow toad to show up.

“Umm, no he’s just late for his shift,” Toadette said, not paying any attention to the fact that Alagold looked pale and sickly. “You missed a ton of stuff. Basically...” Toadette explained things not so basically but somehow Alagold got the point.

“So can I work wit him? It’ll be AWESOME to work with you!” Iggy towered over the yellow toad beside him. “I remember the time you invaded my fortress like how Koru wiped out the Super Plumbers in Koopa Ball Z!”

Iggy wheeled a bike from the Airship. It was lime green with two thwimps tied to it by rope about ten feet behind. The thwimps wore headbands with wires and blinking led lights attached to him.

“-So we’ll ride around and the seismic activity recorded every time the thwimps hit the ground will tell us if stardust is in the vicinity! Wanna ride??? I’ll let you drive because I need to pay attention to this soundtrack so I can learn the lyrics for when I perform ‘Super Plumber Sonata’ at this upcoming comic-con. Also whenever I drive, someone always manages to get hit by a car, even if it makes no sense. But it’s okay, last time it happened the guy didn’t have any friends or family anyway. No biggie...”

Before Alagold could respond, Captain Toad pulled up to them in Toadworth’s fake wood grain adorned station wagon. He rolled down the window. “Greetings Mr. Ala-Gold and Iggy Koopa.”

Toad raised down his window in the backseat. “(Hey, Gold. You don’t gotta be proper. How’s the castle?)”

“I agree..” Captain Toad said, eyeing Alagold from the rear view in a slightly vexing way, but no one really noticed.

Captain Toad left to park around back as Alagold examined Iggy’s bike closely. He didn’t see any rockets or anything else illegal about it, so it was all good. He also wasn’t deathly sick from overdosing, so that was better. “Neat. I’ll drive it.”

The thwimps tethered to the bike pounded the ground in rhythm as they made it from Royal Raceway to downtown. When coming up on the first busy street Alagold realized that there were no brakes!

Iggy took out an earbud. “It’s this a fixed gear bike. Aren’t all of your bikes like this?”

They shot through an intersection, making cars swerve to avoid collision. On the next sidewalk they ran over YoshiMobile phone stands in front of a business and almost hit someone dressed as the Statue of Mushroom in front of a tax company building. Finally the bike ran out of momentum right before a red cross light.

Alagold was still hyperventilating when he realized that he’d held on so tight his little fingers wore grooves in the handlebar's grips. “That was awesome- I mean, AHHHGH!”

“Do you know how to stop this thing? Yes? Then have at it, bro. Just don’t run people down again.”

“Have it your way!” Iggy sang. They rode once more through Toad Town at breakneck (possibly literally) speed, only Iggy had complete control with the fixed gear bike. The thwimps continued to work behind them and alarm noises came from their headbands right as they passed the Mushroom Junkyard.

Iggy skid to a stop and then slid his glasses up on his nose. “I should have known because this place does glow green at night occasionally.”

“Stardust is going to look like an ugly odd shaped rock. Luddy probably would have hidden it with others like it.” Iggy pulled out a flashy ray gun in rainbow neon colors. “Awesome-sauce, I remembered to bring my limited edition ‘Cowboy Boom Boom’ ray gun with real vaporizing action!”

After Iggy whistled and got the thwimps to calm down, they parked the bike behind a broken down car and quietly tiptoed through the junk yard. They bypassed stuff from old mushroom buses, to kitchen appliances, to billboards advertising long past events like Mario Parties and other sports. Curiously, Alagold noticed a lot of discarded Fungus Up signs and memorabilia looking really fresh and newly dumped. Soon he saw a pile of orange bricks. The kind that Mario might frequently break on an adventure.

“Hmm. No no no. We’re talking more like meteor rocks, remember? Nothing square or rectangular or any normal polygon shape.” Iggy jumped up and down and started pointing. “There’s a rock pile that would be perfect~”

Alagold turned to where Iggy was talking about and recoiled. “What in the home-for-infinite-losers are you thinking?!”

The area ahead of them with lots of broken green, red, and yellow pipes laying either on their sides or upright with a huge black chain chomp snored right in the middle of it all. Black rocks were scattered about everywhere.

Alagold muttered things under his breath. “Weird, are junkyard chomps usually red? Alright, just cover me.”

“Not yet.” Alagold was sneaking around pipes with the caution of a Fire Snake when the chain-chomp stirred, freezing both toad and koopa. Alagold wiped the sweat from his forehead when it only turned over a slept once more. He shoveled out one last mound of dirt from the pipe and gasped at what he saw. “This might be it. Catch!”

Iggy caught the dull grey rock. "Yup. 100% unrefined stardust! Here, take a close look."

After Alagold climbed out and dusted himself off he held it. “Umm, why is it glowing like this?”

Alagold glanced down at the mineral in his hands with some worry before smiling. “Totally cool, bro.”

They retraced their steps with the rock. Alagold stared at the sky when he noticed a star up there, but it didn’t twinkle like normal, rather it was dark like someone poked a pin-sized hole in the sky with a needle. Seeing stars in the daytime was always kind of weird, so his mind drifted off thinking about the cosmos when his phone started to vibrate, coming from Mario. By the time he picked it up, it was already sent to voicemail.

“Hey Gold,” Luigi said. “Mario and I grabbed each other’s phones this morning by mistake. Anyway, I was just checking on everyone. Larry’s group won’t answer nor Buckenberry’s. I sent a text to Mario but no reply yet. If you hear anything let me know. Stay safe.”

Then the chain-chomp’s eyes snapped open, revealing starry shaped pupils. “BARK BARK BARK!” echoed through the entire five acre dump. Ground and various junk around them rattled as the chomp bounced their way so Alagold and Iggy screamed and ran as fast as they could. As they followed the winding path back to the start, the chomp plow through the junk walls straight to them like a heat seeking missile.

“Over here! Trust me!” Iggy said. The tall koopaling hopped inside of a barrel, one of many piled up next to discarded Mario party 2 posters.

Alagold prayed and jumped in one next to Iggy’s. His heart was pounding when the chomp reached them, complete with is loud barking and the earthquake like bouncing. After what felt like forever, the noise moved away until everything became silent. Alagold had no idea how long he’d held his breath when Iggy nearly made him wet himself by violently shaking his barrel.

Alagold slowly got up and looked around. “I owe you one, bro. How’d you know?”

“Well, I saw that Mario Party stuff and there’s this mini-game called Sneak ‘n’ Snore,” Iggy explained. “I figured if barrels worked in that game, it might here.”

They reached bike, never hearing the chain chomp again. Iggy whistled and the thwimps returned to life, hopping along as Iggy wheeled it out of the junk yard to terrorize Toad Town traffic once more.

So they parked the bike, subdued the thwimps, tied the stardust rock to the bike, then walked into the fast food restaurant like nothing had happened. Alagold ordered a small combo and Iggy the happy meal. They were setting down near the window and eating for a while.

“You know, you’re okay for a pesky Mario fiend,” Iggy spoke as he played with the toy.

Alagold chuckled. “I guess you’re alright too. Go with the flow, as Mr. Toad would always tell me."

“I had this bad dream last light where this star was attacking us and junk. Then I woke up in the middle of the night and in the dark took a few too many of my anxiety pills. I’m still alive, so whatever.”

They finished their meals and went outside where a bandit was snooping around the bike.

The bandit brought out a knife which made Alagold back up, but Iggy shot his ‘toy’ gun and the laser made the bandits robe catch on fire.

“AHHHH!!” the bandit screamed running away from the restaurant and into a street where he got hit by a car and created a huge scene. It was okay though, because he had no friends or family.

Iggy turned to Alagold with an ‘I told you so’ look. “See? This is what happens when I drive...”

Buckenberry, Lemmy, and Morton went to the Mushroom Mall where in the Adidams (All Day I Dream About Mario Sports) store, Morton talked the clerk into letting him get some five hundred coin Air Koopa sneakers on a credit card that definitely wasn’t in his name. Lemmy took a quick look through the toy store. Buckenberry tried the vitamin shop, but they didn’t have the kind Ludwig specified, so the hidden object must have been somewhere else.

“Does your brother shop around?” Buckenberry asked. He then ripped of the paper on his back that said ‘Kick Me’, one of Lemmy’s many pranks against him. Morton hadn’t done anything yet other than laugh annoyingly whenever Lemmy did and put things on Bowser’s credit card.

“The book store!” Lemmy said, bouncing along on his ball and nearly knocking people over.

“Or the cafe! The Starmanbucks. The overpriced coffee shop,” Morton added, sweaty from the normal walking pace.

“I think those are in the same building. Here Lemmy, take my hand,” Buckenberry said, noting how crowded the mall was and for good reason. Police inside warded off gangs, so it quickly became a sanctuary for the normal people left in Toad Town.

Lemmy took Buckenberry’s hand, shocking the toad. “Got you!” Lemmy giggled. “Besides, I’m like, twenty-two. I’ll be okay.”

“Whaaaaaaat?” Buckenberry was so distracted he walked smack into the glass window of the bookstore. This really wasn’t his day.

Inside the three split again. Lemmy went to the children’s coloring section, Morton went to the celeb news magazines, and Buckenberry searched for the college text books. There were many on all subjects that he couldn’t pronounce and they were heavy as well. Buckenberry scooted a pile over too roughly and the entire thing toppled like an avalanche. The book keepers gave him the dreaded ‘be quiet’ look but he couldn’t stop yet. He got the idea to look in between and under the shelves. After crawling around long enough to get more displeasing looks and pain in his back, he’d found a little white pill bottle right under the shelf where the ‘ancient texts’ section was, only his arm stopped a little short to reach. He’d need someone smaller and acrobatic for that…

“Lemmy, check this out,” he said, coming up behind the rainbow haired koopaling who was currently invested in a jumbo sized color by number book.

Buckenberry turned to follow but tripped on his face because someone had tied his shoelaces together. He rolled his eyes.

Later, the three left the mall with the special vitamins in hand. They were on the sidewalk and Buckenberry didn’t see Lemmy’s polka-dot painted B-Dasher anywhere.

Lemmy looked guilty all of a sudden. “I just remembered something. I was parked in the sixty minute limit zone and I think we probably took about... a million minutes.”

So the trio had to walk (or rolled) several blocks in the hot sun, occasionally crossing the street to avoid shady looking groups of people wearing denim jackets. Buckenberry really wanted to make a phone call, but his cell phone was out of minutes as usual, Lemmy’s phone was a play phone, and Morton didn’t even have that. Eventually a blue pianta with the leaves on his head styled in a pompadour kept staring at Morton’s shoes as they passed. He grabbed Morton by the arm, while his co-horts, rough but burly looking noki, pianta, and strollin stu men and women stood back.

Morton got a glimpse at the switchblade in the pianta’s other hand and froze up.

The pianta noticed Buckenberry and let go of Morton. “Hey, even better idea. I want those vitamins too, or I’ll toss ya so high in the air you’ll squash like bugs!”

“The Chucksters. My brother’s in the hospital now so I’ve vowed that people like us, the working class, the blue collar, ain't gonna be taken for a fool ever again, especially by ‘baddies’,” The Chuckster said, eyeing the Koopalings in particular.

Buckenberry didn’t grasp the significance of any of that he just wanted a fight. He lunged for the pianta, knocking him flat on the pavement. Buckenberry delivered a swift right hook before he was ‘chucked’ away into the grass. Right when Buckenberry got up, a random car sped down the street towards them. Lemmy and Morton dodged away from the street as the car ran over the sidewalk edge and hit the pianta that was just getting up in broad daylight. Now his body was ‘chucked’ into the grass right next to Buckenberry, complete with his neck twisted at an angle.

“They just pounced THE Chuck!” one gangster, a girl Noki in a blue dress screamed. She and the others ran away.

Morton covered his eyes. “Yep. He is gone, perished, splattered on the ground, literally.”

Buckenberry whipped from the pianta’s body to the car, recognizing it as the old station wagon Toadsworth would drive around before he retired. The window rolled down to reveal Captain Toad, beaming with a bright white smile.

“Hello everyone. Why don’t you jolly fellows hop in before the cops arrive? I insist!”

Buckenberry reached in the car and grabbed Captain Toad’s collar, shaking him. “What have you done?!”

Captain Toad grabbed his arm and twisted it painfully with little effort. “I was only saving your life since that fellow had a blade ready for you. Now, get in.”

“Never, you little freak- Ahhh! Frig, your breaking my- Let go!!” Buckenberry heard a distant siren and between the compromising situation he was in and memories of skirting the law yesterday, he made a decision he hoped was right. “Okay, we’ll leave with you!!!”

Captain Toad finally released his arm, with pain shooting through it like a dagger. He almost wondered if getting stabbed by the Chuckster would have been less painful.

Buckenberry could only moan in reply. They all got into the backseat and Captain Toad drove off leisurely. His passengers speechless, Captain Toad broke the silence.

“-So did you all succeed? Mrs. Toadette told me all about the mission. I had just dropped off Mr. Toad at the castle and went back for a stroll around town, my self. My, there so many baddies around, aren’t there?... Have you tuned in to WMUSH recently? They think someone has a death ray and about a dozen are dead from internal injuries. One Goomba engineer’s liver fell out, would you know that? Another Toad lady was bludgeoned then her right and central arteries burst. I know that had to hurt. My favorite is the guy who’s brain liquefied and leaked out of his nose. But don’t worry about that, I baked cookies back at the castle for all of us, with sprinkles!”

Captain Toad briefly glanced at his passengers in the rear view, the smile never leaving his face.

Author note: Did you go O_o at the end? Good! There might be a more of that coming up.

Originally created: 4/27/18- 5/8
Rewritten version: 5/21/18, 5/24, 5/29, 6/20, 7/18, 7/23, 24, 29, 30, 8/5, 8/8
Revamp: 8/23/18, 8/29, 31, 9/2

15. April 4, 444 CE

Hey dad. I know you tell me to not play games on the job, so I haven’t I promise. I was just thinking of visiting home, but I'm not sure if that’s going to be possible for a long time. It’s crazy here, half the windows are shattered at the hospital from the coma walkers, all of us are doing super overtime, people are literally running for their lives across the boarder from North to South, and there’s this weird black star in the sky and the Mushroom Space Institute can’t identify it. What ever’s gone wrong in the world ain’t natural for sure. Talk to ya soon, dad.

The Millennium Star in a blur approached Eldstar, seated on his yellow crystalline throne. “Ho ho, here I am. What was wrong again?”

Eldstar put down the pager beside him. It was an old model from the 90s, patched together with tape. “A star warrior friend of mine alerted me to a growing problem.”

“I was currently involved in a Mario Party, but for you old friend, I’d postpone it any time,” the purple glowing star said.

“Was not your last Mario party decades ago?” Klevar asked with his back turned. He was researching online message boards concerning Toad Town on a ‘computer’, two pieces of granite fused in the middle with a screen on the top part and an input panel on the bottom.

“Splendid observation. It was, but time is a loop ever cycling. What year is this?”

Millennium Star nodded. “As the embodiment of one thousand years I was there hosting then and I will continue to be for 984 more years. Does this make sense?”

Klevar and Eldstar glanced at each other. “..Sure, fellow. Make yourself home in my temple. We must wait for ♡♪!? anyhow as he has the car.”

Klevar powered off the screen he was looking at. “And I’ll look out for him, since I’m done with this research. The verdict? Well, I’m not really sure what to think. I should ask Skolar...”

The double doors of Dr. Toadley’s lab pushed open. “Dr. Toadley sir. You might want to step outside for a moment.”

The doctor threw his keyboard down. “Impossible! Can I accept being beaten at my best game by a girl who is currently standing on her head? No I cannot!”

Daisy flipped the keyboard over, to find that some keys had fallen off. “Doc, give it a break. I’ve only been playing Minesweeper since I was a bored little girl.”

She sat with him in the south corner of the room at the newly ‘restored’ desk. Half of the table was broken off, the laptop’s screen was slightly shattered, and the whole thing being supported by stacks of thick folders. The rest of the lab was still an unusable mess with all of Toadley’s testing equipment, patient beds, knickknacks, and more tossed about randomly.

“Sir,” Mary pressed, “this is really really important. I know you ran those thugs off an hour ago, but they’re back.”

Dr. Toadley pried himself away from the computer with a grunt. Mary accompanied him outside where nearby businesses were either empty or taken over and a giant Banzai Bill launcher was aimed right at the doors.

A bony beetle and dry bones wearing black vests and red bandannas came around from the back. “Give us your building or fall victim to our super symmetry double attack!” they said in unison.

The baddies looked at each other. “Well….because… we couldn’t afford two. But you probably can’t afford another face if you get too fresh with us, see?”

“Doctor, these guys are-! Uh, sir, what are you doing?! Are we going to give it up?”

Toadley looked around for something. “Are we? Yes, but not before I give them a welcoming gift.” He produced a remote from a drawer and took the laptop off the desk.

Mary and Daisy complied hesitantly. They went outside where the thugs were waiting.

The dry bones produced a long knife. “The ‘Dry Bonez Thugz’ and watch your mouth, princess. We would kidnap you if you were wanted enough, but you ain’t because you’re not that blonde princess.”

“Excuse me??” Daisy sprung towards the dry bones and kicked him in the torso, knocking his frame fall apart and sending the blade to the ground with a clang. Before the bony beetle could unsheathe his spikes, she stomped him flat. Both ‘thugz’ were piles of bones scattered on the street and sidewalk.

Daisy glanced at Mary and then looked away with some embarrassment. “That’s kind of a touchy subject.”

Behind them Birdley flew out of the clinic and perched on a power line across the street. The girls stood under it and Mary called him down a few times, but the white songbird didn’t move. Daisy was just offering to climb the pole to get him down when-

BOOM! The Toadley Clinic blew up in a fiery explosion. The cannon was destroyed, and Daisy and Mary were knocked off their feet as car alarms went off and people nearby screamed in alarm. The dust was just settling when Dr. Toadley safely emerged from a manhole on the sidewalk and laughed maniacally.

“Will you try to take the clinic from me now?? Go ahead! Take what is left of it, you hooligans!!….” Dr. Toadley and looked around.

The housing agent knocked Boo up (the old British meaning) that morning to sign another late rent payment slip. Boo signed as a 'contract’ that they promised to do better. Boo stayed up after that and did nothing all morning. It really dawned on them how typical their life was usually, off in a run down apartment in Forever Forrest with no television or internet or even radio. It was a Saturday so they were still off work from their job down the block called 'Stalk and Shake'. Celebrities like Lady Bow or Tubba Blubba occasionally visited the local diner but alas, this was still the weekend...

“...Oh my goodness! I work for minimum wage in a fast food joint and my only other hobby is reviewing food online even though my only subscriber is my mom! I’m flipping useless!” Boo screamed into the sky.

Ludwig revealed the zapper holster under his jacket. "Calm down. Thank you. Have you seen a boom shroom in this area?"

"Stop!" Luigi ran from where Ludwig did a moment ago. “Oh hey. I didn’t know you lived here, ‘Booigi the second’. Did Ludwig threaten you?”

Ludwig glared at his companion. “I was only inquiring of the locals.” He turned back to Boo. “Hand it over. We need it to cure the Mushroom Flu and do NOT get any funny ideas.”

“O-oh, okay...” Boo had just found the mushroom the other day and was going to review it online. The problem was they’d already sampled a bit… When Boo came back out of the apartment with the half eaten fungus on a plate, they thought Ludwig might explode with the way he tensed up at the sight.

Luigi quickly got in front of the koopaling. “Relax. Most of it’s still there! Besides there’s other things to worry about. Mario’s phone is subscribed to some news feeds and there’s officially a serial killer in the kingdom.”

Boo and Ludwig both had the look one might have if say, Peach agreed to marry Bowser.

“Uh, yeah.” Luigi read some info off of the phone. “Almost a dozen are dead by various means of internal damage.. All deceased had connections to mass transport, and there are no suspects...”

“Internal damage?” Ludwig seemed to contemplate something. “That is certainly unusual, but I guess that issue is out of our reach at the moment. Come Luigi Mario, before some thug is tempted to take our kart at the entrance.” He picked up the plate and walked off.

“Guess so buddy. If anything happens, remember to call Mario’s number, okay?” Luigi sprint off as well and Boo watched their night in green armor disappear in the woods.

Now Boo really felt useless. They stared upwards, noticing for the first time a black star hanging in the sky that seemed to follow you. Boo entertained theirself by floating around as if playing a chasing game with the celestial phenomenon. All was well until-

Mr. Toad Kinopio Toadstool downed another Carbamazepine with some water when Toadette opened the door.

Toadette took a few steps in. “Mr. Toad, I’m glad you’re up, but word is going around that the leader of the Chuckster faction was assassinated and the entire group disbanded. That gives the West side baddies complete control over Toad Town!”

Some color returned to Toadette’s face. “Heh, thanks for that reality check. By the way, Dr. Toadley wants in here. His lab was attacked or something. Is that okay?”

“Ugh!! I thought I banned Iggy from using the microwave! I’ll check on you later.”

When she left, Toad mustered some strength to get up. Hopefully he’d feel better once he walked around. Once he hit the halls he saw dust everywhere, the doors to rooms being carelessly left open, and the few staff that were working that day looking directionless. He crossed one of the old timers, Russ T., who was sweeping fruitlessly with stiff yellow broom that was only flicking the dirt around.

“Greetings. I’ve been meaning to speak to you Mr. Toad. Do you know what is special about this month?”

“(Oh yeah, Toadworth was born this month but I missed him before he left. Toadette told me about the whole cure scavenger hunt thing.)”

“That is true, but there is something else. Do you know of what has happened many times on this date?”

“So ignorance will be your choice. I see,” Russ said quietly as he shook his head.

Downstairs on the ground floor Toad passed the den with Roy, Wendy, and Larry inside. Toad called to them but they only looked at him sourly and didn’t say one word. In the next room a smoke was in the air, and Yoshi was standing around looking standoffish with his arms crossed.

Yoshi’s face softened as he returned the gesture. Toadette stumbled out of the kitchen coughing with Iggy behind her, holding a silver steaming tray.

“Wow, what a yandere...” Iggy said. “I think my microwave meals are the best, thank you very much!

Iggy held the tray with one hand and scratched his green head with the other. “Ooooh that. Luddy-sama had them get Yoshi fruit but that’s all I can piece together, that and T. Yoshisaur somehow ended up with them. They can’t speak or even write and no one really knows what happened to them.”

“He’s suffering withdrawal,” Iggy explained like it was no big deal. “A bad dream with a star or something scared him and he won’t touch his medications now. Oh, my shows are on!”

With that Toad was alone, so he decided to answer the door bell everyone else was ignoring, and he got immediately trampled by Lemmy and Morton rushing in.

Morton took slow steps back. “He’s talking nonsense, word salad, gibberish!”

The Captain’s hands lingered on Toad’s shoulder and upper arm, gripping tightly. “They didn’t hurt you did they??”

Captain Toad let go, with red cheeks just as Buckenberry rushed in right afterwards, holding his arm like it was sore. “I’m telling on you, freak!”

“Please do so, sir,” Captain Toad challenged, with his voice perfectly modulated to be considered non confrontational yet still laced with deadly warning.

When they both promptly got lost, Toad found his energy tank to be on empty already. Before he returned to bed, he remembered the note he had for Toadsworth thanking him for his good service. Toad took the elevator to the third floor where Toadsworth’s private room was, quaint with little possessions filling the living space other than bookshelves and a reading table. On the well made up purple colored bed was an old thick book with a felt book mark hanging out of the middle.

Toad turned to the marked page. ‘A stage act in play for millennium past of actors a facsimile of their roles and those scorned..’

Toad started to tell him to buzz off, but it was his own fault for not following the door closing rules. “(Do you know about this, Russ?)”

“Are you familiar with the Dark Star? Not the one that was defeated by the Marios but an original dark star, the first ‘Ztar’? Legend says when it arrives, it encompasses whomever it chooses. Anyone can be a tool or instrument at any point…. Mr. Toad?”

Russ stepped closer but Toad had already passed out. “Oh my!” Russ left the room to look for someone to call for help. He never owned or operated those cell phone things so he was forced to search manually. Incidentally he found someone quickly, standing right were Toad’s actual room was.

“Sir, is something wrong?” Captain Toad turned around, holding his his hands a white sort of blanket that his face was buried in a moment ago.

Captain Toad dropped it in a neat folded up state. “Just doing laundry. What’s wrong with Mr. Toad??” he asked with an edge in his voice.

Russ scanned Toad’s room and found nothing else out of the ordinary aside from the ill kept bed. “He’s passed out back there. Call someone.”

Captain Toad rushed to Toadsworth room, coming out right after. “What did you do?!”

“Nothing. Who authorized you to go in there? You are not on our staff list.”

“I am an intern for today, sir, though this is the Mushroom Kingdom so basically the same thing. I know the Princess doesn’t pay any of you.”

Captain Toad radioed Toadette while Russ was preoccupied with the thought that he’d have an opportunity to be a know it all.

At The Special World Hospital, Dr. Topper entered behind a green curtain marked ‘Case X’. The portable white board marked ‘Power up tests’ was full of tally marks and Morris’s hyperactive assistant was already accepting his next assignment to prep the radiation room. Judging by the scorched marks on the Ukiki girl on the testing bed, and the fact that Dr. Toad was writing his case study, he was too late.

Dr. Toad’s pencil led snapped. Less associates on the project meant he would be farther from- No, Topper could not quit on him. “Are you sure?”

“Well, I can’t leave anyway just yet, I have to get something. Excuse me.” Dr. Topper patted his colorful coat pockets as he left.

Morris turned to Dr. Toad when Johnson left the test area. “Youths these days, and old stuffy men too! They do like to either rush or halt progress, don’t you agree?”

“Speaking of difficult, my first job was as a medic for Sir Grodus back in the day. I got fired when I accidentally sowed a few soldiers hands on backwards. It’s quite hard to tell when we never take off our mittens.”

Dr. Toad heard a light tap on the wall. “I’ll meet you later. I have something to do.”

Morris began to pack up. “Do not worry my dear fellow, I will man the hatches until you return!…”

Dr. Toad left the lab and hung his jacket on a rack. Once outside he saw the vast featureless Star Road landscape with its powder blue ground and dark starry sky, but there was no soul in sight.

“What’s purple, black, blue, and red all over?” Zoo Diddley became visible. His face was swollen and puffy, there were cuts and bruises all over him, and one of his eyes were red and running. “Me!”

“I lost a battle with a pokey, a thwomp, and a… I’m kidding. Give me a hug.”

Dr. Toad was hugged by his not so incorporeal after all brother. He brought Zoo inside and gave him a surgical mask and a bonnet, typical nurse ware. Zoo held a little backpack. “Is there a place to store stuff? I got a few things.”

“Yeah, we have lockers. What happened exactly with your old job that made you have to hide here?”

Zoo dropped the smile. “About that. While on the train I found a today’s paper. Bowser thinks I caused the Mushroom Flu.”

“Of course not,” Zoo said seriously. “I’ll admit I had a part, but only because they had me go to Toad Town and drop cans in places. I still don’t know why they hired me to help, and this punk toad I met tried to do some funny tricks to pin it on me.”

“You’ve always attracted trouble,” Dr. Toad said smirking. “Listen, there’s a reason we have some MF patients here. If we can find out how exactly the virus affects the brain during coma walking, we can reverse deterioration of cognitional abilities due to age or illness.” Dr. Toad noticed Zoo’s blank look. “Dad’s been sick-”

Dr. Toad grabbed a memo pad from a his pants pocket. “First sign this. Congratulations, you are an associate of the hospital as nurse ‘Sue’. By the way, you just agreed that you will NOT experimenting on anyone. Got you!”

Zoo laughed. “Yep you got me, Drew. Heh. You’ve never told me how a schizo like you gets elected president.”

“Not funny. I just studied and applied for the position like everyone else. And I’m bipolar. Get it right.”

“...One last thing, about my blackouts…” Zoo stared at the white floor tiles, trying to think of how to explain it. “Yeah, I think… I might have hurt those people. Like, I’d have a weird headache every time I’d wake up… And I’m hearing things. I think my bell, that I don’t remember packing in the first place, rung itself in my backpack.”

Dr. Toad put his arm around him. “There is a nose, elbow, foot, and brain specialist who has an office here. He’s kind of weird but he’s good in my opinion. I’ll have him look at you.”

“Thanks Drew,” Zoo smiled, revealing rows of sharp teeth. “You’ve always had my back, bro. I’m still hungry and I saw this ‘Applebys’ restaurant down the street-”

“Earn a days wage and then we can talking about you borrowing yet again from me...”

“Hey, Great Eldstar.” Geno bowed respectfully. “I was trying to tell you I might be late but my phone’s screen is cracked so it only works half of the time.”

Eldstar raised his eyebrows. “That is fine. Now, could you explain your concerns again?”

“Sure, pops. So, you know Dark Ztar, right? I think he’s doing something sneaky on Earth. I mean, what has Klevar over there found out?”

Klevar, who hung in Eldstar’s room as always turned around. “Huh? Oh, yeah.” He switched a tab over from Fleabay. “Let us see here. Recent news: A ‘dark star’ has appeared in the sky and is intriguing everyone everywhere. Astronauts in Sky Land are even planning a launch to investigate. Mushroom Flu breaks out in Mushroom Kingdom. Also, they have the first serial killer in a few decades. Here’s some good news. Chancellor Toadsworth was born today, the sweet old guy.”

Geno turned to Eldstar dramatically. “See? And wasn’t your cousin born around this time? Maybe he wants attention. I read some files on a particular Dark Boo on Earth and they saw a dark star in their childhood, so maybe he want to repeat that on a larger scale. As for the other bad things going on? I wouldn’t put it past him either!”

Everyone heard a toilet flush and Millennium Star entered the room. Geno wondered why Eldstar was insisting he come along, but he didn’t have time to complain.

“Klevar, tell anyone asking I am visiting a ‘friend’,” Eldstar said. “Thank you, dear one. Well ♡♪!?, lead the way!”

Geno drove Eldstar and Millennium Star to the dark realm in the blink of an eye. No longer were the structures made of beautiful stone and crystals, they were now jagged dull grey colors of an opaque material. ‘ABANDON ALL HOPE YE WHO ENTER HERE’ was on a sign right before a tall thorn covered black gate, leading to the sanctuary of Dark Ztar. Behind the gates was a onix colored spire coming from the purple cracked ground.

Geno bang on the gate. A moment later dark colored vortex appeared before everyone and Dark Ztar emerged.

“Jolly good, we shall,” Dark Ztar, a large ztar with white eyes, a goatee, and monocle, replied. “And I go by Dark Ztar now!”

“Oh, my apologizes. Anyway, why didn’t you tape that football game you promised to?”

“Umm, Eldstar?” Geno whispered. “I thought you were going to ask about Earth?”

“That too! There is a little more chaos than normal and those on Earth are seeing none other than your image in the skies above.”

Dark Ztar stroked his goatee. “Hmm. I’ve only been doing my job right up here. Why bother with that smelly terrestrial planet and besides, how can you have the audacity to question me when you have than old but very special pager?”

“I don’t think so,” Geno growled. He shot a Geno Whirl at Dark Ztar to stop him. Dark Ztar spun and shot a tidal wave dark matter back. The golden glowing disc sliced through the wave to hit the dark star, or its effigy rather. Dark Ztar and his dark matter dissipate like it was all never really there at all. After being struck by wonderment for a split second, everyone noticed a second sign:

THIS ROOM IS AN ILLUSION AND IS A TRAP DEVISUT BY DARK STAR.
GO AHEAD DAUNTLESSLY! MAKE RAPID PROGRES!"

Geno fell to his star warrior equivalent to knees and shouted, “Noooooooooo!”

Eldstar stood before everyone. “Wait, I have an idea. If he want to play juvenile tricks then..”

Eldstar tossed a white cylinder his way, wrapped in plastic that was labeled, ‘two-ply’.

Note: Originally Created: 5/8/18, 5/19
Rewritten version (no not rewritten on all these dates, rather work was done on it): 5/22- 27, 6/4, 6/20, 6/26, 7/18, 19, 22, 23, 24, 25, 30, 8/5, 6, 8/28, 31, 9/2, 9/8

16. East Side Mario Story

Padded seats, a light pink interior, and snacks on hand made Peach’s private jet comfortable on the way to the Chai Kingdom with Chancellor Toadsworth, (who was no longer a ‘chancellor’ but the name stuck long after retirement) as their pilot. Apparently his wish for turning a hearty 56 today was solely to air travel once again as he had long ago over the beaches of Mushroomdy during the great Bob-omb War. They had been in the air for a little while when Mario played on his brother’s phone. They owned the same model and swapped by mistake that morning. Luigi had no social media or games other than Sudoku, so that’s exactly what Mario played and failed badly at. After a while he got a message from ‘Mario’:

“No, you didn’t text yourself, this is Luigi. Toad and Daisy are awake. Contact asap. Also I can’t get rid of your bottom signature thing. It’s cheesy as heck, bro.

Mario chuckled when Bowser, seated behind him, slammed his pummeled looking flip phone shut loudly. “Grrr. Mario is my true rival, I don’t care that you have fury!”

“Luigi texted me that Toad and Daisy are awake now.” While speaking Mario did a quick recount of his own belongings, including his super scope. He couldn’t remember what prompted him to even bring it but it was there.

She smiled. “Wonderful! We can explain this and we should be home in a few hours.”

Bowser scoffed. “Are you two sure they’ll let us off easy?? Son, show em that video. Discretion is advised!”

Junior pulled a modern large screen phone from his backpack. The video was Sarasaland General Sǐwáng screaming (with the translation in caption) that they would wage war against BOTH Dark Land and the Mushroom Kingdom because the tennis match being canceled in such a way disappointed millions of native Sarasaland people who only had access to cable once a month. Highlights included footage of Sarasaland missiles on standby, weapons on racks ready to use, and a snippet of a public guillotine.

“-That’s my favorite part! If we have a war, can I launch the first missiles? Please please please?” Junior begged, on his knees even.

Peach leaned against the window and closed her eyes, her features tensing. “This is very unlike their generals but hopefully they will calm down when we tell them their princess is okay.”

When the aircraft dropped in altitude, Mario saw the village below with its red tiled roofs, spidery little paths between buildings, and people scurrying around like insects. Junior was a bug enthusiast so he had the same thoughts and became glued to the windows as well. Mario also saw a dark spot the size of a large coin in the daylight. He felt an odd feeling deep inside when his two feet connected with the ground and not just because of the bumpy landing. Everyone carried the few things they packed and walked away from the plane.

“Thanks for getting us here safe, Toadsworth.” Mario noticed deteriorated sate of the airstrip.

“No, thank you, Master Mario.” Toadsworth said, suited up in a brown bomber jacket with a matching old-school sheepskin pilot hat. “I still got it!”

Peach head to the port, a building two soldiers wearing turbans and holding large machetes were guarding.

Peach waved a hand. “I need to handle registration matters and I doubt you’ll enjoy it. Why don’t you head to town?”

Bowser’s giant hand appeared on Mario’s shoulder and pulled him back. “-Sounds good, hotness. The plumber and I will do that with your grandpa! Ha!”

Peach’s smile became a flat line. “Then we will meet you before the government building later.” And that was that.

The streets of Sarasaland emitted the feeling of a bustling but developing kingdom. Ancient buildings whether occupied, empty, or decaying neighbored brand new structures of a modern design. The streets had little to no cars, but instead goombo workers and citizens in droves, zipping to and fro on their business. A rocketon occasionally darted through the sky in their planes, leaving a faint wispy trail. A yurarin snatched the purse of a mother goombo with her kids and Mario was powerless to intervene, especially since he was somehow the one stuck holding Junior’s hand!

“Peach is going to have to go through these same streets without us. We head should back,” he said, annoyed.

Mario turned where Junior was pointing to see a sword shop with all kinds of huge sharp blades displayed in the window.

“Absolutely not!” Mario snapped, while Bowser found it hilarious. Mario transferred the vexing look to him. “Why did you shack us up together?”

Bowser avoided his gaze. “Junior, come here.” Junior went to his dad, who picked him up and carried him on his shoulders. Mario and Bowser were already taller than most of the natives, but this made his son tower over everything. “Didn’t you want a break?”

“From what? The princess? Toadsworth?” Somewhat, Mario answered in his mind. While in the company of both them AND Bowser, he did feel like he had to put something of an act up. The Mushroom Kingdom’s greatest hero couldn’t be seen as too friendly with the enemy. “Well, whatever. Want a drink?”

“Because I saw a war documentary as a kid about descaling koopas. It made me cry,” Bowser answered with out a hint of shame. They pass a gift shop. “Hold on.”

Bowser and Junior went in for a moment and then came back out quickly, with Bowser holding a black plastic bag. “Okay, lead the way mustache.”

Mario observed the street signs again, rusty with the ways of the city. “I think we turn here. What did you find in there?”

Mario rolled his eyes and led the way again. “Have you seen that thing in the sky?”

Soon Peach and Toadsworth met them, the latter now armed with thick travel packets. Sarasaland was six hours ahead of their time so they had a quick picnic dinner outside with sand dunes and the government official pyramid in the backdrop. Under the evening sun’s rays, everyone consumed food brought from home, hoping the energy from it would help them with the very delicate situation that they’d be facing. Insects desperate for free lunch made their way on the blanket they sat on which Mario shooed away and the Bowsers added as toppings for their meals.

“For the last time I didn’t kidnap your princess!! Huh? Well yeah I did that one time, but… NO YOU!!” Bowser slammed the phone shut.

Bowser glanced down at Mario’s Italian dish for a moment. “Nothing really. Idiots just think they can harass me because I ain’t in my kingdom at the moment. But anyway, that reminds me..”

He slapped two greeting cards down in front of Mario and Peach. Mario’s had on the cover ‘Will you be my...’ Mario opened it up. ‘Favorite hoe?’ There was also a picture of the diamond farming tool. Apparently this was a Minecraft card.

Peach opened hers. ‘Baby you make my palms sweaty, knees weak, arms spaghetti.’ “Whatever does this mean?”

Bowser idly scratched an itch. “Oops. I swapped the ones I meant to give y’all.”

“Well I’ll treasure it always… I think.” Mario stuck the card in his pocket.

“I am glad we are getting along,” Peach said. “If anything goes wrong, at least we’ll have our ‘interesting’ dynamic.”

Mario saw that Luigi’s phone had service again. He replied to Luigi and hoped he’d understood the lateness. He looked something up on the web browser. “Hmm. Sky Land launched a shuttle to that thing in the sky earlier.”

Bowser chuckled dryly. “They should have launched a shuttle here. Yeah, launch me back home and in my bed.”

“This is Dr. Kuribo to Boo Master of the Do-Gooder Boo Community. You will find Zoo to be a bright if mischievous little boo. Since the event he blames on ringing a ‘bell’ he had schizoid tendencies such as black outs during which he is violent in a way I cannot elaborate unfortunately, as I only have second hand accounts to go by. He is currently on medication and I will send a full report next week when he is transferred. Thank you.”

Kylie put the files Geno acquired down. The lights were out in the entire Mushroom Press building and the windows and doors were boarded up with the gang activity happening. What exactly was she dealing with? She knew Zoo was special in some way, but what was this sudden mention of bells? It was time to direct her investigation to what kind of object could possibly-

She switched the browser tab to another line of investigating. ‘Susie Que’ was hired just yesterday, so Kylie had Jesse at the front desk trying to dig for his/her application.

"I’m focusing,” she said curtly. “I mean, excuse the attitude, I forgot you were here. You holding up okay? I never intended to have you stranded here with me.”

Jesse rounded the corner gave her the application, leaving the building right after, though Kylie was too preoccupied to notice while doing a reverse number search on Susie’s reference number. It purportedly belonged to a ‘Drew Louis Diddley’, listed as a prestigious scientist with several awards at his young age.

At Kylie’s request, Emery dialed the number with her quick little hands. “Hello...Oh, wow...Okay bye, gosh!” She hung up, frowning. “Yep, I’ve met him before. He’s Dr. Toad and he freaks out when people call him randomly.”

“Dr. Toad is Drew Diddley?! Come on! If that’s our only clue about Zoo we gotta head there, for Mitch..”

Kylie pried away a few boards so that they could leave, being taken back at what she saw outside. The sky was had a red tinge even though it was only mid day. The moon, or what Kylie thought was the moon was looking awfully dark as well, hanging in the sky like a literal black hole. Some buildings were on fire and wrecked cars and property was strolled about. A few yards away a group of cheep cheeps on motorbikes circled three scared Toads and promised to make them fish food if they didn't leave the city. A dry bones and a bony beetle chased a koopa all the way down the train track. The defunct train had been covered over with a banner with both an anarchy and a star symbol on it.

Emery waved to a group across the street. The trio, a human, a bob-omb, and a boss bass turned around.

“Emery? We've been looking for you!” Daffodil said. She ran across the street with the others. Kylie shifted uncomfortably at the unlikely friends of her friend.

“Aye, we befriended two gangs, the ‘Seaworthy Switch Blades’ and the ‘Dry Bonez Thugz’ and with them ran any other baddies out! Lil’ Nukem over ‘ere is the reason why some of ‘em have these big ‘ol cannons and whatnot!”

“That's ridiculous!” Kylie exclaimed. “So you losers just go around beating everyone up?”

“What’s your problem, you unfun little punk?” Daffodil spat, whipping her hair back and getting in Kylie’s face.

Emery got between them and held out her arms. “Stop! I’m sure there’s an explanation.”

Kylie’s fist clenched. “Yeah, this one. Your friends are crap! CRAP!!” she screamed, her voice breaking. Kylie stormed off from Emery and the baddies.

Emery shrugged. “Don’t fret. She’ll be okay I mean.. Like I was the one with the car, but whatever. So, what were you guys up to again?”

Kylie had never before felt such an insufferable mix of anger and betrayal as she walked and walked and walked. It was like a dream, except she found herself in the spot where the paved Toad Town road ended and the orange dirt road began for real. A group of cowboys were lining the gate leading to the foot of Mt. Rugged. Off to the side was a fresh looking wooden sign post saying ‘all Toad Town residents welcome!’.

Once through the wooden fencing, the area was alive. Around the hospital were people’s tents stationed and makeshift shops, even Rowf and Rhuff selling badges. Inside the hospital was quieter. She tried to sit down, order some tea, and wind down when-

Kylie looked around and saw no one addressing her, but felt the urge to head towards Mitch’s room, finding it empty. She rushed back to the desk.

Rou T. went from the computer to her, face full of sadness. “Sorry hun. His family stopped by and handled the rest. I think they pronounced him brain dead.”

Mitch. The guy Kylie met in high-school. The one she spent weekends in arcades with. Her partner as a journalist. The most interesting Toad she’d ever met. Her ex-boyfriend. He was gone…

Kylie’s nose was still runny and eyes damp when she received the third tea and slowly took a sip.

Her ceramic cup make a clink on the table. “On this day everyone will know that they cannot take from me and not expect consequences."

“Kylie, I was going to tell you that the description of the railway killer fits Zoo.”

“Great, because I’m hunting Zoo down and no force will stop me. I’ll even pay for help-”

The rest of his squad seemingly materialized out of nowhere to crowd their table.

“We could use a job,” their leader James said, limping on one foot, “And a break from the walloping going on here! We ain’t getting paid enough for dat!”

“You want us to storm a place?” Richard asked, smiling despite the bandages scattered over his face. “We’re kind of good at that.”

Wiggletron cracked one set of his fingers, namely because his other set of arms were in a sling. “Then let us not let time elapse needlessly.”

Sebastian turned back to Kylie. His head was wrapped like he’s sustained a head injury. “Cool, always a fan! <3”

“Am I the only person who thinks this is the dumbest dern ideal ever?” Parabilly was somehow without a scratch.

“Loosen up, Billy. Do something crazy! Well, aside from jumping on stage and telling us what else happened with your sister and law.”

“You peeps are hired then. We’ll go to the ‘Special World Hospital’ to possibly get the jump on a guy named Zoo,” Kylie said.

Bond stood up from the seat. “Just try to not get yourself hurt.” He stopped right before the entrance. “Oh, and thank you for the tip of Zoo’s whereabouts.”

Kylie’s eyes narrowed as he walked through the hospital’s hastily repaired doors.

Mario leaned back against the sandstone wall of the ancient pyramid that was also neatly also a government official building. From the hallway he could hear the low rumble of all of the constantly stirring quicksand outside. Sandwiched he was between Junior occupied completely with his ant farm, and Toadsworth reading. The three were shunned from joining Peach and Bowser behind the door ahead so they all waited begrudgingly until that gradually abated to just boredom. Mario noticed the vibrant travel pamphlet in the hands of the ex toad chancellor next to him. ‘Take a cruise at Isle Delfino.’

Mario realized he’d been leaning in while imagining himself on a beach. “Oh nothing. I wish I was there right now.”

Toadsworth folded the pamphlet up. “I concur. Maybe we can fly there again someday.”

Mario was half asleep when the door was slammed open so hard it almost flew off the hinges. Bowser stomp out groggily.

Mario sprung into the room that contained nothing but file cabinets and a single wooden desk. A door was directly opposite from the one he entered and wide open with guards heading their way. Mario kicked it shut.

“That diplomat freak offered me a complementary tasty tonic then next thing I know, I wake up and Peach is gone! Who does he think he is??! ME??”

Mario ushered everyone out back into the hall they started in and locked that door too. “We have to find the Princess! Were there ANY clues?”

“Yeah, the topic was ‘relocation’ to a castle or something. Got any ideas, Mr. World Traveler?” Bowser asked.

Mario nodded. “Daisy’s Castle! Unless things have changed, that’s the only castle in the land.”

“I got this plumber, get over here...” Bowser picked up Mario. Mathematical formulas appeared before him as he calculated the shot. He might have missed at the Mario Kart race two days ago, but he wouldn’t this time. He tossed Mario like a speeding bullet right at the guards, making all of them topple over like bowling pins. Bowser scooped Mario up in passing and they made it outside of the pyramid and back into the Chai Kingdom.

Mario spit out part of a tooth. “Walking would take too long. We’ll need a ride.”

As the world was bobbing up and down in time with Bowser’s massive sprint like steps, Mario noticed Junior and even the usually slow Toadsworth keeping up excellently as they zipped out into the streets and down an alley, entering into a closed shop to loose any guards following their trail. Among some carpentry, Mario was dropped down roughly into a short wooden chair.

“Next time I’ll drop ya on the floor then.” Bowser went back outside. He really was on a roll when the princess was involved, Mario pondered.

Toadsworth peered into Mario’s eyes with his beady own, shedding his previous look of fear for something Mario couldn’t describe. “Master Mario, what is Bowser to you?”

Mario rubbed his cheek where the tooth ache, not in the mood for that in the slightest. “It’s complicated.”

“Not at all. Let us see here: Bowser let a rogue nearly cause a bio-terror scare and you are okay with that.”

“You are being ridiculous, no offense. I can’t stop every bad thing, okay? I’m one person and I’m not freaking perfect!” Mario raised his voice, wanting so badly to tell off the old man who really was more of a liability these days anyway. After all, he did no real work around the castle aside from worrying about Peach needlessly and enforcing so many arbitrary rules even though this was the twenty first century and-

Mario shook those bitter thoughts out of his head while Toadsworth continued to look uncharacteristically smug.

“Indeed you are one person. Smart move old chap, electing your brother to do all of your work back home today.”

“Don’t go there, Junior,” Mario warned. He spun around when he heard Bowser stomping near. “Did you find a bike or something?”

Outside was an army motor dolly, but he shuddered when he caught sight of its original owner unconscious and curled up in the shadows to the side of the building they were hiding in.

“LET IT GO MR. GOODGUY,” a voice seemingly inside himself said. Mario could not eschew the suggestion.

Mario got into the drivers spot and Bowser got beside him. Junior hopped in the back, and Toadsworth got in last. The engine came to life as smoothly as an old decrepit lawn mower, cruising them out the alley and onto the condensed crowds. They left down town and drove over one last sand dune to find a bronze colored sphinx to the left and an Eastern styled temple to the far right. Daisy’s Castle was in the middle, positioned right under the evening sun. It was two stories tall, reflecting Daisy’s down to Earth nature and it had age on Peach’s castle by at least a century or more. Leading to the castle was a sandstone path with daises lining it on each side and five guards armed with spears. Five guards that were starting to become very alarmed at the vehicle racing towards them!

Next Mario knew, the guards were jumping out of the way as their car shot down the sandstone path. Mario stomp the brakes and they skid all the way into the nine foot tall bamboo doors, breaking the lock and knocking them slightly open.

Bowser shrugged. “Not really your style fatso, but it got the job done.” He jumped out the kart and slammed the doors fully open.

They first hugged the wall to the right, sending alarmed servants and unarmed guards packing as they snuck around. It was like Tom Clancy… Except Mario had the super scope, aiming it at every moving thing and not stopping short at the person that descended the stairs that lead to the second floor where the throne room was. The general raised his arms high, muttering in another language.

“Bowser, stop screaming at me,” Mario said with gritted teeth that ache, souring his mood farther.

“I haven’t said nothin’ moustache,” Bowser replied, confused. “Hey, you! Take us there already!”

The general went back up the steps slowly, Mario’s gun pressed to his back, heading towards Daisy’s throne room, a frilly and old fashioned looking thing with walls lined in gold, a glass chandelier above, and a red ornate carpet leading up to the throne with Princess Peach beside it.

He froze with weapon in hand. Guards were in the room also armed with spears raised to attack but no one got near. The general they’d confronted went straight to a young person, arguing with him in native tongue that didn’t sound very good.

“Y-you are welcome to attend the upcoming wedding of Princess Peach and Great Honorable General Sǐwáng XIX of Sarasaland’s National Force,” the shaky Bullet Biff in a business suit said. “Or, you w-were...”

The general, apparently General Sǐwáng went off again on a rant they couldn’t understand. There were apparently multiple General ‘Sǐwángs’, it being part of a title rather than a proper name. The skinny looking fellow before them was definitely not the one who sent death threats over video message to Bowser.

“Mario, whatever are you doing?” Peach frowned. “It’s all a misunderstanding. Put that down!”

Peach continued anyway, holding back tears. “Once Bowser fell asleep during that meeting, they told me they would launch the missiles towards the Mushroom Kingdom if I did not marry the general. I told them that Daisy was unharmed but no one cares!”

A low growl emitted from Bowser’s throat as his eyes wandered to the super scope. Mario caught the look, his intentions, and everything. Toadsworth and even Junior were silent closest to the door, both anxiously anticipating what might happen next (for differing reasons) but also determined to only observe.

Mario wanted to reply, but the words never came out. Something was wrong, very wrong, but what could he do now? Was it really his hand holding the trigger at this point?

The bad guys… Mario dropped the weapon to the ground as the fog cleared. Consequently he found his voice.

“Princess, you’ve always known what was best for the kingdom before. I’m very sorry and I wasn’t thinking straight. Umm, blame jet lag. So I’m Mario if you don’t know. This is Bowser, Toadsworth, and Junior. We only came here to let you know that your princess is awake now and the whole thing started by a mistake, so please don’t take this out on the rest of our kingdom.”

The translator relayed that tangent and the General and his guards seemed more confused than angry.

“Umm, let me introduce the Princess properly too, if you’ d let me approach her. It’s a custom where we’re from.”

The translator said that. The General didn’t take his eyes off Mario when he spoke back.

The General nodded, finding that a much better idea… for some reason. The blonde princess became free to slowly join Mario’s side.

“So, this is Peach and why don’t you get to know her? She’s a treasure, she really is.” Peach flushed when he said that. Bowser seemed sort of jealous, but knowingly Mario’s entire group shared a ‘glance’.

“In addition to running a Kingdom that’s gone hundreds of years strong without even an official army,” Mario continued, “she plays sports, throws parties, and has a good time. Notice her shoes. She has another neat talent.” Mario, with Peach in his embrace, had his back against the door. “...She’s a good sprinter in them. EVERYONE GTFO.”

Peach ran out of the doors with Mario, Bowser, Toadsworth, and Junior frantically tumbling down the steps as well. Clumsiness paid off when they collided with guards at the bottom of the steps. Mingling around on the bottom floor were now a lot of normal looking towns people and a banner hung up said in Chinese ‘Civilian Group Meeting’ (though they didn’t know that). Mario and co. tried to blend in with the crowd who were conveniently heading down halls leading out. They almost made it when they pass by a very innocent looking servant girl, shyly standing near some fine pottery and dusting it off while trying to avoid the gaze of too many people. Peach took kindly to her and smiled warmly. Suddenly the servant pointed to them all and screamed with an unusual alarm sound.

They got a shock when rushing outside. The sky was becoming darker and darker with a burgundy hue. Monks were running from the temple and archaeologists from the sphinx. It was like the entire country got put on alert at once.

Everyone crammed in the cart to speed back up and over the sand dune to get into the city again. It was dark without street lights and they almost collided with panicking natives immediately. Mario strained his eyes to see.

“Grr. I blame that stupid moon.” Bowser pointed above to the eclipse. On closer inspection the ‘moon’ was oval and no extra light could escape from behind it.

“Master Mario, I want to apologize. I said some things I should not have and I do not know what came over me,” Toadsworth said all of a sudden.

Mario was only partially paying attention. “Sure. I think we’ve all screwed up today.”

“What were we thinking trying to negotiate without Daisy physically with us?” Peach hugged herself tightly, overwhelmed.

Bowser Junior’s phone was almost the only source of light around when he cut it on. “Done, dad.”

~Make a left turn in one-hundred feet. You will reach your destination in five minutes~

It was a good thing Mario was a taxi driver very briefly back in Brooklyn. (How else would he get the inspiration for the deadly Mario Kart?) He could memorize that distance anywhere, even in the dark. What couldn’t be memorized however were random cars and passengers blind without technology assistance who almost crashed with them every minute. Mario swerved to avoid a goombo on a bike. He almost crashed into another motor dolly. A sign post knocked off the left side mirror. Okay, so maybe that last obstacle was a stationary one. Either way, it was time for that left turn which would put them on the airstrip. The already vibration prone dolly became an earthquake simulation when they started to hit the pot holes.

Mario stopped the kart just as it became dark enough to only see the white strip that was on their private jet. Bowser felt around until he found a door.

They then heard someone’s nails scraping against the plane’s aluminum panels. Mario and the rest protest.

“What?? I’m only scratching deep enough to find the door seam. Bleh. Our airships down home don’t have this problem. Well, we don't really use doors either but still..”

Bowser became illuminated by a warm glow. Approaching the five were soldiers holding flaming torches with a different general tagging along.

“Attention foreigners, you will not be leaving!” one soldier said, holding a loaded weapon. This general, a bearded bombshell koopa with his features contorted into a deathly looking scowl, was recognized as the guy sending those threatening video messages. A breeze also started to pick up.

The general said something that didn’t sound good and shoved the soldier aside. He grabbed Peach’s left arm and tried to pull her his way.

Mario and Bowser found themselves jumping out at the same time but froze in place as a low drone unlike anything they’d ever heard. While not visible against a black sky, a swirling dark cloud settled and became a black hole. Dust and sand from the landing strip began to be sucked upwards like there was a giant vacuum above the area. It increased in strength and they felt the pull themselves. The soldiers had long ran away and abandoned their general. Even where they were, they could hear the cries from those in the city.

Mario’s hand closed around Peach’s right one, but the general still held the other side, star struck and staring upwards with his mouth wide open.

“Mario?!” Peach began to scream and Mario also, eternally at least. His hat and her crown were taken from their heads. Mario held on for dear life when he felt large hands surround his waist area.

Junior shivered as Toadsworth scurried inside the jet. The sound of the engines spinning up right next to them was silent compared to the vortex.

“Do something!” Bowser’s feet began to lift from the ground. “Right now!!! Do it!!”

Junior grabbed the first thing from his backpack and smashed it over the general’s head. As his ant trooper farm shattered, insects and shards of glass went everywhere, disorienting General Sǐwáng and making him lose the grip on Peach. Mario, Peach, Bowser, and Junior came crashing to the ground while he disappeared in the sky.

A moment later Mario could tell they were in the jet and he could hear Peach and Bowser arguing loudly, as he lay in a chair exhausted.

For Sarasaland, whose timezone was six hours ahead of the Mushroom Kingdom, April 4, 2016 was over.

Originally Created: 5/15/18, 5/18/18
Rewritten version: 5/27/18 -6/3, 6/15, 7/23, 24, 25, 30, 8/5,
Revamp: 8/24/18, 8/31, 9/17

17. Stan

Personal Letter: This is to my buddy Whacka on Mt. Rugged. Wasn’t that math homework terrible last week? I got an extension because our teacher knows I work so much but I’m still struggling! I might need you to tutor me. I don’t mean that in a funny way though. XD Me and the others are having to run off thugs a lot but it’s pretty fun. Did you hear about that Sky Land shuttle? It's creepy, the shuttle was sucked up and they couldn’t contact it anymore. We’re all stipulating that it’s a wormhole but that still don’t seem right and the news ain’t covering it no more. These are freaky days, ain’t it? Worse still, forecast calls for storms later and our power reserves can be shoddy. Stay strong and remember how often we flood.

Toadette muttered to herself as she trudged to answer the doorbell. “-Dr. Toadley, if you're going to go outside and search for mines when I told you we don’t have them, don’t lock yourself-” She opened the door. “Out?”

“Hey Toadette. What’s wrong?” Luigi asked, coming in behind the koopaling.

"Alright then," Luigi replied skeptically. Besides that, Mario had replied that Luigi was doing a great job as the temporary leader and that was great, even if the text took some hours to get through overseas.

“Mr. Luigi?” Captain Toad came out of a room holding a plate full of blackened cookies. “Would you care for some? They are crispy but..well...”

“Luigi! Don’t take anything from him. He hit someone with a Mr. Toadworth’s car,” Buckenberry jumped out from behind a houseplant like he’d been there for a while waiting. Also, he inexplicably had a black eye.

“Let the sir settle down, will you?” Captain Toad said with a dangerous twinkle in his eye.

“I’ll pass, but thanks.” Right then, Daisy cartwheeled into Luigi, knocking him down.

“Hey Weegee!” she said over his body. Her skin was green and she’d grown six feet tall.

“Give him some room, babe,” Toad said in perfect English. He smiled and was wearing some spare clothes while also covered head to toe in red spots like on his cap with a third arm sprouting from under his left one.

“We got used to them an hour ago...” Iggy said with a shrug. He came from where Ludwig came from, only he was suited up in a white coat with yellow thick gloves like a mad scientist. “But not him.” Iggy pointed out Russ T. who was currently on a tall ladder painting black stars on the roof. “Creepy right?… EVERYONE DUCK!”

Iggy and everyone else dove to the ground as a helicopter drone with razor blades zipped in the air above everyone’s heads in an erratic pattern.

“It helps you exercise. If you don’t move you die. Neat right? Do you all feel exercised yet?”

“Iggy, turn that thing off. We need to get back to work!” Ludwig growled. “Junior just sent me some horrid emoji ridden text message that they are on their way back.”

“Peach is almost back?! Great but why are people mutating anyway?” Toadette asked. “You never explained that.”

Ludwig thought for a moment while the drone continued to whirl dangerously above, somehow never managing to hit either them or Russ T. “Junior probably cross contaminated our Mushroom Flu virus sample by spreading it on toast once or twice, they should live however... Do not give me that look, everyone. In the mean time, Toad and Daisy would be great at tennis.”

Luigi flipped on his back, turning to Daisy. “He’s right you know.” He stared at the ceiling above, observing the well detailed black stars that were now obscuring the original blue paint job. “Yeah, definitely not a fan of the redecoration.”

Channel 64 reporter Lakitu turned the microphone back to himself as the cameras rolled.

"Thanks for the time. You’re one of the last undisturbed businesses in Toad Town."

The Postmaster smiled, hardly detectable under his grey mustache. "Just doing my job. After all, thugs, freaks, and baddies still need to send their letters. Just look over there.”

The camera panned to a bemused Dry Bowser retrieving a package from his PO box.
“I am not a thug, freak, or baddie. I am not even sure why I am here, save for a thinly veiled author shout out to another author they like. Oh well, off to Waluigi’s Taco Stand...”

The camera panned back. “Anyway, that was Channel 64,” he said into his camera. “CUT!” Lakitu put on a spartan style warrior helmet. “I’m going to roll before a baddie steals my car again. Over and out!”

When Lakitu opened the door, his face was pelted with a large water balloon. His car drove off with the occupants laughing.

“Woohoo! No more expired tags for me!” a teenage orange spotted toad girl said with her passengers being a human, a boss bass, and a bob-omb. All but one of the nearby boo buddies hanging around also cackled. The Postmaster ran out and shook his fists at the hooligans but it was too late.

Just then a bandaged and bruised Parakarry landed roughly near Postmaster, with half of his lost feathers floating down from the sky a second later.

Parakarry leaned against the door frame, rubbing his scraped knee. “I know, but there’s this huge influx of letters from Mt. Rugged to Toad Town. Since it’s probably concerned family checking up, I can’t stop now.” He breathed out deeply. “I’ll head across the street to Club GameCube for a drink. Club 64 got unsafe hours ago.”

When the winged mail carrier went across the street, he had to pass the boos hanging around. He felt leery walking past the group consisting of a Big Boo, Pink Boo, and normal Boo Diddley, but they didn’t disturb him when he entered the club.

“Hand it over!” the dry bones demanded. His buddy, a bony beetle held a knife to the manager of the club, a sentient orange Gamecube console. Both baddies clothes consisting of black vests and red bandannas looked scorched for some reason.

The baddies turned to Parakarry. “Don’t you know who we are?” the dry bones spat. “We’re honorary Dry Bonez Thugz, Phil and Leo.”

“They can’t take anything from me anyway. My funds are with my banker and he’s a sentient Playstation 3, so you’ll never hack the info out of him!” the manager said.
Phil shoved the manager backwards hard into the floor chipping some of his plastic.

“That is enough!” Parakarry rushed forward, and as an ex partner of Mario, he knew how to battle proper. The Paper Mario style curtains fell. Parakarry was on the left of the field and Phil and Leo to the right. The backdrop was the restaurant and the only audience was the manger and one more traumatized cook who didn’t get off early because his train home happened to be the defunct Toad Town 101. The irony.

Completely out of turn, they rushed toward Parakarry with their blades in hand. The whole simulated stage fell apart and right as Phil was about to toss his blade, aiming at Parakarry’s heart, a heavy salt shaker bopped him in the head. His detachable body broke apart once more and his head rolled a few feet way.

Leo spun around. “What the? Who did that?” He turned to the manager and cook. “Did you?!”

“It was me...” a very low voice growled. A very plain looking boo diddley revealed themselves, the same one Parakarry saw out side.

“Oh, one of you freaks! You’d better run, cause this is my strongest attack, brutha!” Leo shot some spikes at the boo, who didn’t flinch when they bounced off harmlessly.

“That’s a lie and I knew it. Here, let me show you my strongest attack, heheh..”

The boo ran up to Leo and disappeared again. A bluish glow surrounded Leo and before he knew it, he was tossed into the restaurant’s dishwasher set to ten. As Leo’s muffled screams came from the appliance, Boo appeared again at Parakarry’s side.

“It’s ‘Booigi the Second’.” Booigi turned to the workers. “You need to be somewhere safer.”

“No way,” the manager said. “I’m going to be the last still open club in Toad Town if it kills me.”

Boo kicked him of his own restaurant by means of defenestration. He survived however, because he himself happened to be sentient Gamecube, but his disk tray lid wouldn’t close anymore.

Parakarry was wide eyed and slowly began to walk away, then ran out screaming for his life, both him and the cook. Booigi shrugged.

“Eh, buddy,” Phil’s head said. “Umm, could ya at least place me on that bar table? I think there’s mousers crawling on the ground.”

Booigi chuckled. “Sure.” Boo took a sip from the tap and then burped loudly.

Elsewhere, Captain Toad was searching for Dr. Toadley. The doctor arrived at the castle just in time to revive Toad earlier after Russ reported him passing out, and Russ and the captain got into a bit of an argument as well over something very silly. He stopped and dug in his backpack for his phone so that he could check on his vacationing Toad Brigade squad when he found something else. While resuscitating the Castle Adviser, someone must have taken his signature blueish purple vest off to aid in stopping his fever. That didn’t explain how the Captain now had it since he wasn’t even in the room due to the argument..

In the privacy of the halls, he wasn’t sure why, but he had the urge to lift it to his nose and inhale, taking in a mixture of the fabric softener that was standard issue in the castle and sweat. Captain Toad checked his back, confirming that he was alone. That was… weird. He idly put vest back in his backpack for the time being and got back on track, sending a short text to Hint Toad and finding the doctor in Peach’s backyard garden, partially submerged in one of many little holes all over the place, uprooting the vegetation indiscriminately.

Captain took a step back onto the ‘safety’ of the concrete path. “Thank you for the warning, and for saving Mr. Toad’s life.”

“Have I found any? Not yet, but they are near I know.” Toadley tossed aside the little gardening spade he was using as he caught his breath. “-How is Toad by the way?”

“Am I just checking? Yes I am. One can never be too sure, especially with the people working in THIS castle.”

“I certainly agree.” In Captain Toad’s mind, he had at least three people on a hit list already. “What went wrong with Mr. Toad anyway?”

“You should know that I could not determine. Could you tear you eyes away even for a moment as I placed the drum against his abdomen and slowly moved it upwards to his chest as it rose and lowered? No you could not.”

“Only for a second, and I don’t remember staring at Mr. Toads, er, abs.” At this point, Captain Toad realized how red in the face he was.

Dr. Toadley began chipping away at stone boarder of the eternal star fountain again. “Should you relax? Yes, I am teasing you. Go on...heh..”

Captain Toad thought it best if he just forgot that ever happened. Back inside Morton had one eye pressed against the kitchen door’s key hole with Lemmy, Larry, and Wendy standing with their backs to the wall.

“Iggy is handing Ludwig an orange test tube. Then a green one. Now it’s bubbling over...” There was an explosion sound. “Now Ludwig’s face is covered in soot. Iggy is being strangled by Ludwig. I repeat, he is strangling… wait, now a death machine gone awry is chasing them both!” Morton reported.

As Captain Toad walked past he heard giggles from the group. Whipping around he shuttered when he saw Lemmy waving around Toad’s vest. He felt a heat wave come over him, even to the tips of his ears.

“It’s not nice to take things that aren’t yours,” Lemmy said, wagging a finger in a mock authoritative tone.

Before the Captain reached him, he tossed it over head to Larry who had ran down the hall. Before he got to close to the koopaling with a blue mohawk, it was tossed to Morton.

“You stupid children really don’t wanna to piss me off..” Captain Toad said, forgoing formality. “It’s not yours.”

“I don’t see what the big deal is, I mean, yeah it’s not ours but it’s not yours. What good is a musty old vest to you? Do you like bad smelling things? Is it a hobby?” Morton made a pass to Wendy.

She barely touched it before holding her nose and sending it to Larry. Larry made a sort of mouth with his hand and had it kissing the vest. With a wave of disgust he dropped it finally to the floor.

“Larry saw you in the hallway earlier. He’s good at spying, it’s just his thing, and he saw your nose all in that nasty vest,” Lemmy explained, hardly containing his laughter.

Captain Toad picked up the vest, balling it in his fists. “You speak of this to no one, now get out of my sight.”

Captain Toad punched the closest decorative vase with a swift right hook, making it practically shatter into dust all over the textured floors. This sent the koopalings running. Right after, Luigi entered the hallway with Dr. Toadley’s intern at his side and stopped at the mess on the floor.

He sighed. “I see the kids were playing in the halls again. Anyway, how are you, Stan?”

“I am quite well, thank you Mr. Luigi.” Captain Toad regained his composure.

“Show me that garden in the back,” Mary said, grabbing one of the tall green plumber’s arms.

“Sure, but it’ll have to be quick. I still need to fix the flooding issue Toadette told me about.” When he got really close he whispered, “And we can discuss the car incident later...”

Was Luigi threatening him? Well, it didn’t matter. They both knew who would win in a street fight, none other than the guy voted ‘bravest toad’ of 2014. Stan, or Captain Toad decided to head out for some fresh air, but before he left out the front door Russ T. came up from the basement, dripping wet from waist down. Muttering to himself the entire time, he opened a closet and pulled out a gray plastic bin before retreating back down. Captain Toad followed, they had unfinished business.

“Sir, you wouldn’t argue for the independence of the BeanBean Kindgom if you were aware of what befell Giant Land during the Goomba Wars of Year 334 CE!” Captain Toad screamed his rebuttal (that he’d mulled over for a while after ‘losing’ badly in the earlier political discussion) down the stair way to no response.

It was dark and humid due to the basement directly below being inundated by blueish green flood water and all but abandoned. Russ was walking through it at the bottom of the stairway leading to the basement, tugging along that bin that floated.

Captain Toad rushed to meet him. Russ had only became ‘quiet’ for once after his face became glued to the book that was on the bed next to Toad. From that point on, the historian was apparently a muttering ceiling artist.

Russ fiddled around with picture frames on the wall. “Delimited by the natural and bestowed potential by..”

Captain Toad ignored the rambling when he noticed a dark five pointed shape painted on the floor that wasn’t there when he met Toadette this morning. What was more, it matched perfectly what Russ painted on the ceilings back in the main lobby. Behind him Russ went back to work, salvaging random water logged items for the been.

“Leave me alone and go bother that castle adviser you’re absolutely infatuated with!” Then he added in a whisper like voice, “Or don’t. Mr. Toad will never see you the way he does that Toadette girl anyway.”

Captain Toad flushed angrily as he slung him around, pressing him into the wall. “Excuse me, sir? Please speak up!”

Russ shrugged rather uncharacteristically. “You are just another generic toad to him and your secret fanclub is all a waste. He’ll never love you.”

“TAKE THAT BACK!!!” Captain Toad punched right next to Russ’s face, making the blue capped toad duck into the water while the Captain punched a hole in the dry wall. Breathing heavily, he realized his mistake. “Sir, uh, I’m sorry. Hey, where did you go?”

“You will resist no longer, hero.” Russ emerged from the water to rush Captain Toad, armed with the a sharp metal corner end of a picture frame. Hidden behind Russ’s glasses where black starry pupils that Captain Toad would never notice because he was too busy holding him off.

“I knew you were a crazy old man!” Captain Toad said, pushing him down with ease to hold him under the water. It bubbled beneath him for a while before he finally let Russ up who gasped to catch his breath. Captain Toad pat him on the back with a patronizing smile. “My apologizes.”

Suddenly Russ head butt Captain Toad, knocking back him onto the star mark on the ground. It felt soft and rubbery, with some of it pilling off the ground when he got up and even sticking to the Captain’s hands and clothes. It had an acidic smell and even burned. Thoroughly freaked out, he made a run for the upstairs when Russ made him trip up the stairs falling in a way that broke his headlamp on impact and made his backpack fall off and roll down into the water. The weighty contents escaped to float in the murky water, including Toad’s very special vest.

Enraged, Captain Toad punched Russ in the face, hitting his mark this time. Down he went on the upper dry portion of the steps headfirst with a small almost inaudible snap. Feeling his stomach churn, Captain Toad waited for Russ spring up and try something else, only…

The star symbol on the floor and the black stuff that was once on the Captain’s hands was gone. Numbly walking back to the lobby, the stars on the ceiling were gone yet still there. Black stars seemed to follow him in his mind...

Outside, Dr. Toadley was now destroying the front yard using a snow shovel as his excavating tool. He was currently knee deep into one large hole, not far from where Bowser’s Airship was parked.

“Let me dig the rest of this one. I want to bury my time capsule in it later, if we don’t find a mine.” Captain Toad sat a heavy and wet plastic bin down with a lid firmly on it.

Dr. Toadley climbed out of the hole. “Is that a wonderful idea? It is. I have already found ten mines.” He held up coin sized objects that resembled pebbles, then slipped them away. “What is in the capsule?”

“Uh, a secret, sir.” Captain Toad, now a shadow of his former self without his signature headlamp or backpack, got to work for a few minutes, trying to plan exactly he would avoid becoming subject to guillotine due to what was possibly the third worst situation he’d even been thrust into.

“Ah, have I found mine #11? Yes I have!” Dr. Toadley suddenly said from a hole adjacent to his.

Dr. Topper sat down as his desk once all of his students were stetted at their computers and playing online games or whatever youths did. He often used the computer lab to let his class have fun under the guise of it being a therapy. They weren’t really learning anything, but they deserved some fun and they always loved the ride and visuals from Donut Plains to Special World. It also kelp his mind off the nasty custody battle he dealt with at home.

He opened a drawer where there was a little bottle. While hiding his hands under the desk, he poured a little into a small shot glass and downed it. The liquid warmed him from within and he was relaxed again. Someone knocked.

A nurse came in. “Hey, can I use one of these?” he asked. “I’m Dr. Toad’s new assistant, Sue.”

Dr. Topper paused at the sight of the rough looking boo. “Go ahead. I see Dr. Toad isn’t a complete loner for once.”

The dark boo chuckled dryly as he went to a computer. “Guess not. How do you know, Drew, or Dr. Toad I mean?”

Dr. Topper walked to where he was. “I’ve been an associate since he was elected president. It’s kind of funny, he’s always been cold to me from the start but never fired me. Even when I try to quit he hesitates. I don’t really get him, no offense.” He noticed the CDROM his new guest held with ‘take control over your mind. 100% works’ scribbled on in sharpie, making him frown slightly. “You didn’t pay for that, did you?”

Sue gave him a mischievous smile behind his back. “I can tell you’re a cool dude. You wanna know something? You wouldn’t have to share the custody with your second ex wife if you made went ahead and just told her supervisor that she cheats the taxes.”

Dr. Topper froze in place. “While I don’t agree with what she does, I could never ruin her life just because- Wait, who told you that??”

“Dr. Topper! Dr. Topper!” a purple yoshi preteen said. “Your phone is vibrating on the table.”

His text message said: “Visitor at front door.” Dr. Topper as unofficially elected as the ‘least weird associate of the hospital’ was oft sent to answer the door, especially when someone ostensibly important showed up.

Dr. Topper left the computer lab, making a note to recheck his privacy settings on social media. The hammer brother knew he was an open book, and any one of Topper’s behavioral class could have put that kind of sensitive info on his page.

The metal sliding door opened and Dr. Topper reached for the hand of the black shelled noki who wore a loose black tie over a green Hawaiian shirt for some reason.

“Greetings,” Jelectro Bond said. “I am from the Special World government, just doing a census on enemy species working here.” Bond handed over a check list that he’d written out on notebook paper with several common enemies on it, ‘dark boo’ curiously being the first on the list.

“-Don’t call me your friend first of all. Secondly, no one is an ‘enemy species’ to me. Why judge someone as an enemy just because of what they are? Do you think I’m one too? Huh?!?” He pushed the paper back into Bond’s chest.

“Yeah, one that damages the social rights of eighty percent of the population. I watch over kids that are abandoned and alone. Do you know that ‘enemy species’ are three times as likely to be given up than toads and friendly species??”

Bond stepped back at his animation, getting the same feeling he did around Kylie, though he couldn’t come up with exactly what it was. Either way, there wasn’t time to argue politics. “Let me rephrase. Is there a recent hire that’s a dark boo here? I am also checking forms and he did not do so correctly when hired.”

When the hammer brother went back inside, Dr. Toad was waiting for him fidgeting around nervously.

Dr. Toad saw the visitor from the window. “I don’t know. You seemed kind of ticked off when entering. Did you explain that we’re up to code?”

“He wants to see your new assistant because didn’t fill out some forms or something.” Dr. Topper pat the sweat off of his face from the rapid onset anger. “Not sure where that tantrum came from..”

Bond was outside checking his Rolex when he saw something down the street. Kicking up a big cloud of power blue dust was the van of the MKDCU speeding like they were on a drag strip. “Merde!”

“Oooh, you said a bad word..” Zoo answered at the door. “Actually I don’t care. What’s up?”

They sprint to the vehicle. Just as Bond hit the push button ignition, his face collided with the steering wheel as the van plowed into the car from behind and dragged it down the road.

“This is super exciting, hehe!” Zoo exclaimed in the passenger seat. He’d face planted into the dash also, but thankfully Bond couldn’t see how much more ugly it’d made him.

Bond threw off his broken sunglasses and felt a cut above his eye. He stomp the gas and swerved to the left, going off road. The van stayed parallel with them and from the street as James leaned out of the backseat window and fired a mafia gangster styled weapon. The bullets still sounded like little explosions as they pelted the car, the bullet proof nature of the car being the only thing saving them.

Zoo turned to Bond. “I’ve met those guys before and they’re real softies. I could liquefy their brains if I could concentrate-”

Bond eased up on the gas just enough to let the van get slightly ahead, then he swerved towards its rear wheel, making the top heavy vehicle spin out and fly off the road, landing into patches of green, blue, red, and yellow flowers. Bond continued to drive without looking back.

“So like…” Zoo said in the car after they’d driven for five more tense minutes and his heart stop beating out of his chest. He was visible now. “Are you going to arrest me?”

Bond studied him in his peripheral vision. He’d never been so close to Zoo before and was more surprised than he thought he’d be to see that he really was a typical boo and not some imposing monster..

Zoo stared out the window. “Hard to explain. Let’s just say an old co-worker told me.”

“You are taking measures to conceal your actions. I know what happened to Mitch. I think it’s too late for him now.”

“I know. Just… forget your past transgressions from this point on. I wish I could have gotten more info from Kylie before she went mad but the way she spoke about hunting you down felt ominous and I just knew I had to intervene. Could you explain about the bell? I gleaned it from Kylie’s notebook.”

Zoo went back to staring at the road. “This is going to sound weird. I took it from my dad a long time ago because he made me mad. It was just this really old thing he had with some other junk, but it caused some freaky stuff to happen like portals, loud noises, pants wetting stuff. I never had an issue with it again for years until a few weeks ago. It always seems to follow me and I thought I heard it ring on its own.” Zoo opened the glove compartment, and there it was. It’s yellow glow lit the car up before he put it away. “See? I guess you know about the homicides at the train stations too then.”

Bond cut the radio on low. “Yes. You have to understand, clingy objects tend to want to preserve their owners, not destroy them. I will work with you until we solve this.”

“I do not think any of us are the real enemies,” Bond replied vaguely. “Either way, you look beaten. Perhaps you slept on a train, on your right side, and you got into a fight with a hobo who was dead when you woke up. Take a sip of the Absinthe in that cup holder, you’re of legal age, oui?” Bond noticed Zoo staring at him with astonishment. “I’m a detective, and quite talented with brain waves like you.” Bond slid his glasses down, unabashedly revealing his eyes. “Do not use my friendly gesture to try anything funny, mon ami.”

Zoo only smiled and slyly. It was the time of day when they played tracks from independent artists so an oddly fitting ‘Reprisal in A minor’ by Ludwig Von Koopa played all the way down the long road back to town.

Miles back on the road: Wiggletron bent back into shape the metal axle of their truck, being hindered by the slick oil that covered his body and Sebastian’s shaky grip with the flash light.

James got into the drivers seat. “Good work, Wiggs. Imma give it a go.” Once everyone got out of the way, James slipped into neutral and let the van coast about ten feet before the car sunk back with the tire popping off and rolling away.

“It’s no dern use!” Parabilly threw his straw had down. “Our livelihood is gone and the misses down home ain’t gonna let us use my personal truck. Not after what happened last time.”

“For your info Billy, it’s not my fault that plate of steaming hot nachos spilled in the back seat. I can’t help not having arms. Besides, blame her for this mess!”

Richard was talking about Kylie, who silently sat crisscross on the ground the entire time since the crash. “We’ve ran Bond out and he was alone. Zoo is all ours.” She got up holding a can of boo repellent. “After I spray shoot, one of you.”

Kylie held James up by the collar. “I am paying you, so I am indeed. Do as I say or your ‘axle’ will be broken.” She dropped him.

After an uncomfortable moment the MKDCU agents eventually abandoned the van and followed Kylie’s unflinching walk towards the Special World Hospital.

Originally created: 5/31/18, - 6/5, 6/10 (oh and it’s VERY different…)
Rewritten version: 6/25/18, 6/26, 7/18, 7/20
Rewritten again (yes three very different iterations of this chapter): 7/23, 24, 29, 30, 31, 8/3, 8/6, 9/3- 9/12, 9/17, 9/22

References in no particular order:
-‘Stan’ (aka stalker and fan) is a term for an obsessed fan. Now you get the reference?
-Long defunct X-Play on G4 videogame station did a test on the Gamecube, PS2 and Xbox. The Gamecube won the durability tests, but the lid was messed up a bit.
-Shout out to Yoshizilla!! ‘Always a fan <3’ to quote Sebastian of MKDCU.

18. Minesweeper

Geno hated to sit around when who knows was happening on Earth, yet here he was. Bored, he picked out shapes and patterns on the sapphire colored floor when the sparky and impenetrable caged door swung open.

The star jailer, dressed in silvery armor, stood in the doorway tall and imposingly. “Thou hath been summoned before the judge.”

Geno was escorted into a grand coliseum in the middle of space, where the session was in progress. Six members of Eldstar’s household were all up on the witness stands while he himself was nervously seated at a desk as the defendant. Dark Ztar slouched on the prosecutor side, even yawning. Starslaps with cold dark unfeeling eyes were all lined and packed in the jury box and the gallery were star beings holding signs either for or against the star spirits. Meanwhile Judge Rosalina, dressed in elegant blue dress, announced the charges.

“Dark Ztar is charging for attempted assault, vandalism, abuse of power, and invasion of privacy.”

The platinum blonde continued. “Now that we have every witness for the defense in the courtroom, wait. Where is Millennium Star?”

Rosalina nodded to the baliff. “Then by refusing to defend himself, he will be considered guilty.” She slammed a mallet. “What is your testimony?” she asked the witnesses. “Dark Star claims you spy on him from some kind of ‘com-pu-ter.’”

Klevar broke the ice. “I only searched information about Dark Ztar that was publicly available.”

Misstar was so far stooped down to conceal herself, only her oversized ribbon was visible. “So are we going to go to jail? I'm too pretty for that!”

“I'd run the prison if I got sent there.” Muskular not subtly puffed out his chest.

“What fun is that?” Muskular then picked up a brassier a fan threw their way.

“There was a stage play here yesterday and that was an actor returning a prop,” Klevar explained quickly, while flushing.

“Order!” Rosalina wrinkled her nose. “If the crowds do not control themselves, this case can and will become closed to the public.”

“I’d like to make an objection!” In flash Dark Ztar’s attorney appeared in the courtroom. A green sickly looking star with deep black eyes, Zeostar, wore a blue tie and held a suitcase.

Dark Ztar perked up at the sight of his attorney, glaring at his cousin. “Here is evidence of Eldstar and his ruffian family’s escapades!” He snapped open an old dusty laptop that had crashed and showed a blue screen.

Rosalina and the bailiff traded an uncertain glance, then she tapped the table. “Is there an expert who knows if it is supposed to be that way? You two may come to the bench.”

Just like winners on a TV game show, the yellow male and pink female star that Rosalina had chosen got up from their seats and skipped down the steps, ignoring the jealous audience booing them except for the part when the female sucker punched a jock looking star that catcalled her. So the two approached Rosalina:

“Yep,” Iris Rage, his companion said. “That laptop is busted by spyware.”

“Actually Miss Rosalina, spyware isn’t put on a computer by a spy. It just means he picked up a virus somewhere online,” Aurelius explained.

“On...line? Is that where you can speak to others electronically? Like, say, Twatter?”

Everyone stared blankly and so Rosalina slammed the mallet. “You two may sit. If the defendants are as confused as I am, I highly doubt they have infiltrated the prosecutor’s computer. What does the jury say?”

“Let us move on to the next charge of vandalism. I want ♡♪!? and Eldstar on the witness stand.”

“Oh great…” Geno grumbled from his seat. He went to the stand with Eldstar.

“We did it,” Geno and Eldstar confessed simultaneously. They turned to each other in surprise, as they’d expected the other to lie so that their contradictory response would hopefully cause confusion and buy time, except being who they were, nothing went as plan.

The mallet was slammed. “Well that was easy. Time for a recess!” Rosalina jovially got up from her seat. “Besides,” she said quietly to the bailiff. “I am curious as to what this ‘internet’ is all about!”

The bailiff grinned knowingly. “Just beest careful with that internet, princess. It’d beest a shame to receiveth hath lost in thither, and there’s few or none will entertain it thee doth, doth not behold up thy own name on Google Images!

The sky was taking on a red cloudy hue, the black hole in the sky had grown during the evening, and the castle's moat overflowed by six feet, but everyone’s attention was on Ludwig as he stood before everyone outside near the entrance of Peach’s Castle.

“I am pleased to announce that the modified cure for Mushoom Flu X is complete, if you have not noticed by the fact that the kitchen is accessible.”

The koopalings conspicuously hid snacks stolen from Peach’s cupboards behind their back.

“-Thus, we can make plans to deliver the cure the moment King Dad, the princess and the others are back!” Everyone began to clap. When the clapping would die down someone would start again and rouse it up all over. This as annoying as it sounded.

“It was only a matter of reducing the stardust, Mushroom, and fruit to their basic chemical elements!- EVERYONE SHUT UP! -And then distilling the mixture with the active ingredients to Dr. Mario’s megavitamins.” After a pause Ludwig added, “Someone should send him a card. I am not too proud to admit my shortcomings and this speedy development of the new formula all would not have been possible without the hours of research he did on the Mushroom Flu beforehand.”

Ludwig glanced at Luigi with a hint of admiration. “Thank you. Working with you today was not an entirely miserable experience..”

“The doc’s my homeboy back at Smash Mansion. I’ll send one,” Toad scratched his back with his third arm as he’d been itchy the entire time. “Umm, that reminds me. That leak downstairs has flooded the basement up and screwed up the septic tank. No one take a shower in the meantime. I learned that the hard way.”

“Daisy, Toad, no!” Luigi said right before he got knocked over into the grass by the brunette and mushroom retainer.

“Me too, what a bishonen!” Anime style lighting bolts went from Iggy’s eyes to Luigi in a bizarre visual effect that only he saw. “I bet Luigi never needs to use womanizing spray!”

Thomas came out of the castle doors. “Can I go home now? My uncle’s relocated down south.”

Thomas turned around with a huff. “This wouldn’t be a problem if Captain Toad hadn’t tracked the mud in!”

The Captain had been present only physically until that point. “I’ll clean it up myself,” he mumbled.

“This meeting is adjourned. Someone help me load up the airship.” Nose in the air, Ludwig marched away.

Eventually everyone else also went on their separate ways and Captain Toad was alone with only the sounds of the birds and wind. He went inside to clean up the floor, his mind still on many things when someone entered.

Captain Toad spun around and there was Toad Toad standing merely two feet from him. Instantly he began to sweat.

“Say, we really do look alike when you don’t have all your fancy equipment on,” Toad continued.

“I left it in my van… My equipment,” Captain Toad sputtered. “Uh, sir. I have.. something to tell you about the castle’s librarian.”

Toad shrugged. “Really and without a trace? Well, I don’t blame him. Where’d he go?”

Toad reached up for a high five. “You know what this means, right? His tyrannical door closing polices are over!”

Captain Toad raised his hand to his, and held it there maybe too long. “Sir, one other thing.” If there was one person he could tell it would be him so after taking a deep breath-

“Let’s go Toad!” Daisy interrupt. She cartwheeled through the lobby in her own mutated green skinned form.

Captain Toad stood for a moment, then lashed out by punched the wall once or twice. After hearing snickering he followed the patter of koopaling feet up many stairs. He went all the way up to the fourth floor, reaching the top just as an electronic sliding door closed tight. Prying it open, he found a figure seated before a large grandfather clock. The small koopaling turned around with a playful look.

Captain Toad realized his holster felt empty and then a shot went off on the ground near his feet.

“Ha ha ha! Lemmy’s such an entertainer! An experienced one! A pro!” Morton came away from an alcove in the wall rolling in laughter.

Lemmy twirled around the zapper. “I just wanted to show you some tricks, like-” Lemmy tossed it up into the air, making Captain Toad dive to the ground. The gun landed in Lemmy’s hands stylishly then he blasted a random house plant to smithereens.

Captain Toad glared just as the lights went out in the room, leaving only the orange glow of candle light. For a moment the Captain wasn’t sure if he’d somehow made that happen, only to be disappointed when there was the distant sound of thunder. A storm was coming.

Lemmy dropped the gun with a high pitched squeal. “I’m afraid of the dark!! Let us out!!”

Morton went for the door and beat on it. “It’s locked, sealed, inoperable!!”

“Save it, koopas. These electronic locks will never open unless the power is restored,” Captain Toad said. The certified marksman retrieved his zapper to find that it was still loaded. The two Koopalings turned to Captain Toad.

“Are you going to do what you did to that Pianta guy??” Lemmy asked tearfully.

Had Toadette not been tasked with the clean up of a kitchen considered beyond repair to anyone less determined than her, she might have heard the single boom from upstairs, but instead she was zoned out while washing pots and pans and nodding along with headphones on. The song was mildly chaotic. It almost sounded like something Ludwig might conduct...

“Oh yes, I met the most wonderful Nigerian Prince using a thing called e-mail…” Rosalina realized her mic was on with a flush. “-And so the recess is over.”

Ushered in from the left of the courtroom came Reggie the Business Bro dressed in a white robe. “Eldstar is indeed vengeful.” Reggie got in the witness stand. “As of yesterday, my five children are now without their father!”

“Actually, your honor, the strike did not originate from me,” Eldstar replied. “Reggie J. Business Bro was zapped because he was attempting to use Dark Ztar’s power to strike Bowser Koopa, the intended target.”

“No!!... Well maybe… But I had a business to run and that Bowser guy ruined it.”

“I’ve started an Overthere division but they are a tough crowd and too many are on a diet to drink my sodas!”

A ringtone went off from behind Rosalina’s desk, making her fumble to silence it. “Excuse that, I am still learning this new iPhone. Now as for you that is unfortunate, but it does not concern this case. You are dismissed.”

Reggie muttered under his breath as he was escorted out while Dark Ztar clapped in mock.

“Good show! Tell me Great Eldstar, how exactly did HE get struck instead? It’s like you knew what his message to me was, hmm? Go on.”

Zeostar opened the suitcase and pulled out a tablet. “Here Eldstar is admitting that he has an item that violates the rules regarding the balance of good and evil millenniums ago.”

“That is absolutely ridiculous,” Skolar spoke up for the first time. “The Great Eldstar is the epitome of fair and good, if he was not he would not be himself. If he was not himself he could not exist. Without the existence of Eldstar our entire council could not be established and we would not be here now. That evidence has to be completely rubbish.”

Anxiously everyone waited while Zeostar hit a switch and the floor of the coliseum became crystal clear to provide a screen. The video was filmed by a shaky phone camera held by Dark Ztar. He knocked on the door of the Star Temple and was let in. A banner that said ‘Family Reunion’ was tied high above in the ceiling and the area bustled with various stars, all up in age, socializing in various halls.

Dark Ztar dart straight to his cousin drink bar serving punch from a bowl. “Say chap, I have a question for you. Why is Goomba Bieber still alive when I get about a thousand requests to annihilate him everyday?”

Eldstar, swaying a lot, showed his old pager patched up with tape. “I can change the messages,” He downed another cup. “But I only do so rarely! Okay, sometimes. Okay, yesterday.”

“Oh really now?” Dark Ztar said mischievously from behind the camera. “Is not that cheating?”

“Not if it is saving lives. Besides, if it was up to the people of Earth to execute, angry teenagers would have wished every young pop star dead. I like some of them, say that Generation Z and Atari and iiii. You know?”

Dark Ztar quickly shut off the film with his cheeks red. “So there! You heard it folks!” he announced as others gasped in disbelief.

“Let us wrap it up. What does the jury say Eldstar abusing his power?” Rosalina asked.

“So in conclusion, ah, no need to read it all out again. They failed miserably!” Rosalina slammed the mallet and the gallery spilled out down onto the floor and everywhere else with a thunderous rumble. Unbothered, Rosalina was instantly messing around with her new iPhone again and the bailiffs and other members of the court joked among themselves. There was a dark cloud in the court, but it only hung over eight individuals.

Geno threw his hands in the air. “Didn't you at least see the camera aimed at you?!”

Eldstar stared blankly at the star warrior. “So that is how he did it? I thought he was just holding his phone funny.”

Skolar frowned. “Cameras defy logic with their mysterious ability to capture the past.”

“Did you all know about the pager situation?” Eldstar asked, thinking about something.

“Yes, Great Eldstar,” Klevar said solemnly. “But we never however fathomed that we would be sued over it!”

Dark Ztar was proudly walking past the golden towers of millennia that lined the outside of the court when someone jumped out in front of him.

“I know you’ve done something, Zach.” Blocking Dark Ztar’s path, Geno went full X-Files on him. “I couldn’t place it at first, but you used Zoo as a catalyst because he had history with the bell. Zoo Diddley’s psychological reports had eye witness statements. Hundreds of people saw a dark star emerge from a portal the day Zoo rung that bell, so explain that. Plus that portal is on Earth right now. And you thought this lawsuit would shake me off of your tail? Ha!”

Caught in the moment, Geno tackled the dark star down, hearing something also fall to the ground and crack.

A deep growl emitted from the monocled star’s throat as he tossed Geno off. “You buffoon!! I have not had a presence on Earth in a very long time!!”

Geno quickly scooped up the broken phone device before too many people noticed. “Sorry. My phone’s like that and it still works.”

Dark Ztar jerked it away. “Capital! It’s bloody busted! I turn 434,324,356,234 today and this is what I get? There’s only one other dark star I know in this part of the galaxy and I rest assure you chap, she is OLD news. Now, I suppose you want another charge don’t you!!”

Geno turned to run, but he couldn’t stop thinking about that last part. What other dark star??

The battered Aston Mushroom puttered through another back alley to stop behind a building. Bond rolled down the window, which fell out and shattered on the floor. He turned to his companion in jest. “Think you can give me the tour?”

Coming around front they were at the Mushroom Press. Zoo followed Bond when he ducked under some undone wooden boards, having nothing else to do than to play along with the noki. It was dark inside with papers strolled about and file cabinets hanging open. Zoo found something he’d left at his old desk under ‘Susie Que’, a small framed watercolor where a black and red color swirled together to become a dark circle in the middle. ‘Assimilation’ as it was called, painted by Drew years back.

Meanwhile Bond sat in an empty chair and dialed a number. “Just checking on you.”

There was commotion in the background including the sound of a choo choo train, indicating to Bond that Agent N didn’t have his office door closed like usual. “Getting pampered in the tropics?”

“Not exactly.” Bond lifted one arm and regretted it. He hadn’t had a chance to shower considering he slept in the car last night after leaving Kylie’s house. “Have you heard from your niece?”

“She’s down south with no progress but spies have reported that Bowser and the Princess made a truce to develop a cure sometime before leaving the country. Did you know there’s another issue in Toad Town now and we’re suspecting a death ray? Between that and our satellite disguised as a Sky Land shuttle getting eaten up by a black hole in the sky, aren’t you glad you’re nowhere near Toad Town?”

“All you should worry about... Tell me, Agent,” Agent N said in a lower voice, “how are you fairing having to stay indoors all of the time with that tropical storm sweeping through?”

“It’s fine here. If it stormed, I slept through it!” Bond glanced at the weather forecast in a nearby paper and hoped he was right.

Bond hung up unsure if that was a good or bad response. Did his superior not trust him? Had he been discovered by fellow spies? And even worse, if they discovered his association with Zoo they’d never understand. He went to Zoo who was still nosing around his old office.

Zoo tossed him the bell super hard on purpose, but Bond caught it anyway being a ‘shortstop’ in every meaning of the word.

“If you HAVE to know Mr. Sherlock Mario, ask my parents. Drew told me they’re just out of town, ‘retired’. Stop that stupid smiling because that’s the last place you’ll ever drag me.”

Bond examined surprisingly heavy object that had a warm glow. “If your parents hold the clues, that is where-”

“Yeah, that’s right,” Zoo spat. “You saved me that one time but now we’re through. I bet you think its my responsibility or something even though I was HIRED to drop off the sodas off with a ‘for free’ sign on it. That whole hospital thing was me getting bored at the press over there. Do you see any windows in that corner? Of course not, so I made a prank call based on some newspaper clippings in Steve’s office. I didn’t think that entire hospital was corrupt enough to take it seriously. That gang thing? I just ran into the wrong knucklehead pinatas.” Zoo cornered Bond against the cubicle walls, baring sharp teeth. “And while you might be ‘special’ you don’t fool me. When this is all over, THEN you’ll just turn me in and I’ll be right back where I started. Medicated again in an asylum with no job or life!!!”

Bond stared back with a perplexed melancholy before sighing. “I would never do that, but if you still want to go that is fine.” Bond held the board blocking the entrance. “Please be careful.”

“Of course. Just clarify one thing. You were ‘medicated’ at some point, but now you aren’t?”

Zoo paused. “Yep. The prescription ran out a week ago and I never bothered. Will you piss off now?”

Zoo phased through the wall instead of taking Bond’s kind gesture, but he didn’t mind. He only watched Zoo for a moment before dodging back inside to Kylie’s station. All of her work was present, including Mitch’s journal. He thumbed through a few pages and became fixated on a single page containing a detailed sketch of a black colored star that he must have missed yesterday. ‘Dark’ stars were everywhere starting today, from becoming a component of anarchist symbols, to being the shape of the ash left behind in the Toad Town 101 subway incident, to being in the skies. He jot down his thoughts: the bell brought a ‘dark star’ to Earth fourteen years ago on a small scale once. Kylie’s notes said Zoo was put in institutions right after yet its resurgence is right after he’s unmediated? He could only speculate the connection between the bell and Zoo’s powers. He just knew that malevolent objects attached to people usually protect their owners, not the opposite. To see the latter was unusual indeed. He packed up and went back outside around the back.

Bond didn’t plan on completely losing touch with Zoo go since anything could happen, but he didn’t think the reunion would be so soon. Someone was digging in the trunk of his ramshackled car. His borrowed ramshackled car. And Agent N’s expensive items were littering the grimy alley floor.

Bond stepped up to the pile of dress clothes, cuff links, and even an expensive watch, all untouched. What wasn’t untouched was the wrapper of a devoured choco-bar. “These aren’t mine obviously. They’d drag the floor.”

“I wasn’t. You ignored the valuables for the one snack. I’ll take you somewhere and then drop you off.”

Oddly calmed down, Zoo gave up and got back in the passenger seat where he’d started. Surprisingly, he didn’t hate it that much.

One ‘doctor’ was observing a crazed yoshi in a cage practically bouncing off of its walls. The dinosaur was ‘coma walking’ and his meters were going off the charts. The metallic portly intern of sorts was hanging around to hold the place for the actual doctor chosen to be an associate on the Case X project, the last one actually but arguably the most important. So he stood and sipped from the silver canister borrowed from Dr. Topper. That Chuckola Cola hit the spot!

“The health inspectors are here!” a goomba doctor screamed while passing the door. Metal Mario took his time leaving.

Outside, the MKDCU thought they had all of the associates of the Special World Hospital lined up against the building. Richard dragged Dr. Toad out last as rain began to sprinkle down.

“Sure shortie!” The burly goomba towered over Dr. Toad, making him shiver. “Just gotta make sure you're up to date.” Richard tossed the badge over to Wiggletron.

“I detect no fraudulence here.” Raindrops pattered the flower on the tall wiggler’s head and he clinched his side where he’d gotten his phantom injury from when Sebastian attracted cultists during an expedition abroad in a Spear Guy village. The poison dart injury that was actually neither poison nor dart still acted up on rainy days. Which was… today.

Parabilly also found Dr. Toad’s badge and the papers representing all associates just fine. He put on his straw hat and handed the documents to James.

“Where is your assistant, dear fellow?” Morris whispered to Dr. Toad. “We’ve never had these kinds of health agents here. They might want a higher bribe than usual.”

“The government person still has Sue but his warrant wasn’t even active in Special World so there’s no way they know about that anyway.” Dr. Toad dug in his back pocket. “Also I have this. No worries.” There was a shiny gold ‘Master Plan’ credit card in his hands.

Meanwhile dapper monty mole squint at the papers for a time too short to have read anything. “It's all good boys. Guess those ten patients are fine in your care except, yep, we have those travel costs and there were a few issues that we could forget about if-”

“On it!” Dr. Toad rushed forward with the card. “You have a terminal, correct?”

“Well I reckon I can find it in my bag. The terminal connects to the serial port adapter I installed in the mini-pci slot on my laptop,” the parakoopa explained.

Sebastian dropped to his knees, teary eyed. “I’ve waited all my life for this!!!”

“Actually it has been eight days, five hours, and twenty-three minutes since our last paycheck,” Wiggs clarified.

“Stop! Everyone freeze!!!” Kylie came up from behind with her eyes glued to some of the documents. “You claim forty eight associates but I see forty seven, brother.”

Dr. Toad swallowed hard. “It must be a miscount. Someone from Dr. Topper’s class might have gotten counted by mistake.”

Dr. Topper and his class waved. “I remember you. That's Kylie and she's a reporter. I’ll call you if I get any news.”

Kylie threw the papers to the ground as thunder boomed and the downpour began. “Where is that last person?!”

Just then, Metal Mario finally came out of the building. He gave everyone a look like he was too old for this nonsense and then went back inside.

“Uh, it’s him. Yeah, he’s the missing one,” Dr. Toad held a clipboard over his head to shield the rain.

“All of you GET!” Kylie growled, causing all of the staff to rush back indoors.

“Woman?!” James glared. “They didn’t pay us our overpriced service fees yet!”

But Kylie was already walking in the middle of the lane down the road, to the displeasure of everyone.

“Her paycheck had better be worth it...” James thought, losing his patience with their employer.

Downstairs Luigi saw that the stairway to the basement had the water reaching the third stair from the top. Luigi had a flashlight, a tool belt and two companions.

Luigi peered into the water and couldn’t see the bottom. “Yikes! This is b-b-bad.”

Toad dove in first. His hyper ways and the third arm made him like a jet turbine in the water. Luigi grabbed on for the ride with Daisy grabbing him and completing the chain. The three zipped around avoiding submerged linen, clothes, furniture, paintings, and more in the darkness. Very quickly the flashlight shown upon the rusty metal door of the drainage room, an area somewhat ingeniously built into the castle that contained two pillars that if pressed, released all water from the moat into a nearby lake. Luigi tried the handle to no avail. He turned to his friends and did a shrugging motion while holding his breath.

Daisy immediately pried away the metal door with her bare hands, pulling it back like a sticker. Enamored Luigi almost missed dating her except he didn’t because he was actually kind of terrified. Luigi and Toad were pushed into the room by water rushing in until Daisy closed the door again, sealing them in. There was an another sealed door leading out but other than that they had a breathable air bubble.

Luigi illuminated the area with the flashlight. “I’m glad I brought you and not the others. None of us even almost drowned or got hurt.”

“We'll always have your back green!” Daisy noticed the square stone pillar that rise about six feet high. “I’ve never been down here. Can I do the honor y’all?”

“Go for it homegirl,” the bespeckled castle adviser said stepping closer to the base of a pillar where some kind of gravel crunched under his feet.

“Hi ya!!” Daisy jumped high in the air and stretched her legs out so she landed while doing a split on the switches. Rumbles came from the floor, growing in intensity. Keen and alert, Luigi looked around until the floor buckled under them and all of the shallow water in the room, along with those little ‘pebbles’ Toad stepped on earlier went down the two inch crack.

Toadsworth and his four passengers got warm reception from their friends and the Koopalings (aside from the several of each group absent inexplicably) as they came over the hill that was behind the castle.

“Mario and the Princess and Mr. Toadsworth and Junior are back!” Toadette said, with most of the castles staff and party celebrating.

“Of course Vater.” Ludwig motioned for Iggy to come close. “Do not you have something for our dear King Dad?”

Iggy snapped his finger. “Oh yeah, I have a death machine- I mean gift!” Iggy put a Hawaiian flowery necklace over Bowser's head.

Bowser noticed the real feeling flowers. “Hey, I like it!... Wait, this ain’t gonna slice my neck off is it??”

They went inside from the back entrance and explained the harrowing details of what happened to Sarasaland. Peach nearly fainted at the reminder that another black star was in the sky over the Mushroom Kingdom. This called for yet another meeting between Bowser, Peach, and Mario who spoke outside again, this time in the front. (Peach ignored the pot holes amazingly.)

“You don’t, plumber. Anyway, what about that cure stuff? My eldest brat said they finished it and it’s ready to go.”

Mario made sure his spare hat was on tightly, turning to Bowser. “I almost messed it all up back there with that super scope stunt and so now I have to follow though doing the right thing. Whatever happens happens afterward.”

Bowser crossed his arms. “That’s stupid, suicidal, moronic, and did I mention stupid? But ya know what? I don’t care about all this ‘right thang’ stuff but you’ll probably need my help to not muck it up so I’m in.”

Peach patted the tears on her face with a cloth. “You are right, no matter what tragedy befalls the stars are guiding us… Even if I do sense a bit of disturbance in them today.”

Bowser stretched his leg that gotten restless on the way back. “Stop that crying! It ain’t a good look for ya, hotness. On the bright side, you left the castle all day and it’s still in one piece-“

In a roar a metric ton of the freshwater shot up like a tidal wave from the moat and splashed over on everyone, quickly flooding the land. Yoshi had become the Dr. Toadley’s next bomb hunting partner after he discovered that the odd pebbles scattered about were bombs. He was at the property line of the castle and Royal Raceway a few miles away and felt the explosion. Yoshi ran back to assist but Dr. Toadley stayed put dropped the shovel in regret.

Bowser, Mario, and Peach hung for their lives in a tree. Water filled with loose debris rapidly flow just inches under their feet and mist filled the air. Everyone was displaced in the flood water and there were screams coming from in the castle. Bowser turned to Peach as he thought of something.

“Yeah, your castle is now screwed, but my airship’s alright over there floating. Looks like a success to me.”

-Generation Z is from Kaiimi’s ‘Suicide Country’ (at least in the first chapter before the author changed it to Girls Generation which is a real band, so I stuck with the fantasy version.)
-Atari and iiii is borrowed from Mario and Bowser: Frenemies Forever Chapter 13 Mario Party

More dates: 6/3 – 6/13, 6/18, - 7/3, 7/11
Rewritten first time: 7/16/18 , 7/17, 7/18, 7/20
Changed again (all the dates above are different stories essentially with how much I changed but I’m a nerd about exact dates..) : 7/26/18, 28 , 29, 31, 8/6, 8/7, 8/13, 8/28, 9/2- 9/12, 9/18, 10/3, 10/7, 10/9

19. Mario Party

Emery’s mind drift as she drove. “I wonder what’s going on with Kylie? She didn’t pick up.”

Daffodil rolled her eyes. “Forget her, plus we’re losing daylight. We need to get to the South.”

The troublesome four were cruising out in Lakitu's fluffy cloud kart when they bypassed a Boo near a stop sign who seemed really familiar to Emery for some reason. The little boo had a confident smile as their eyes locked to hers.

The car skid into a thin telephone pole on the edge of the street that snapped and fell towards them. Inches away from the screaming passengers, it became transparent and the log phased through them to hit the road where it became solid again. Their hero and protector was right at the driver side.

Daffodil nodded. “Come with us pal. We owe ya one and we’re going to the hospital to have some, uh, fun.”

They were traveling again though the busted up, worn, and gang infested Toad Town someone ran up to their car.

“Emery, what are you doing here?” Geno asked, running along side them comically. “And have you seen Kylie?”

“♡♪!? , I can’t help you. She went all bipolar on me and ran off.” Emery shrugged, being egged on by her friends except Booigi, who only observed.

Geno was left in the dust, panting. He knew why everyone on Earth was acting strange, but he had no idea what to do about it. He hoped Kylie would be more level headed once he finally located her.

Located outside of Toad Town, the orange evening sun was low and the weather clear. A silver Aston Mushroom, riddled with bullet sized dents, no driver’s window, one flat tire, and leaking oil, coast to a stop in an open green field. On the dash was every error alert ever. Bond got out and took a look around. Zoo got off afterwards and thew his burger wrapper in the back seat.

“This reminds me of being a teen at a community camp,” Zoo grumbled, shielding his eyes from the sun.

“Quite the opposite. You know, there is still a walk to the village so if you leave now, your parents might not spot you and bake cookies for your arrival,” he teased.

Silence, aside from the rustles of grass and very distant birds. Zoo was about to reply sharply but he couldn’t ignore the tears involuntarily running down his face. Caught between embarrassment and anger he prepared to run before Bond clipped his glasses on his shirt. Though Zoo never noticed back at Special World, he could now clearly see Bond’s beady but grey and cloudy eyes.

“Believe me when I say I understand. Your upbringing was rough, so was mine. I was given up for adoption and lived in camps until I was eighteen. My ‘fancy’ things, the car, the watch, the shirts, all come from work. I do not even own a house, I live with Jeremy, erm nevermind. Either way, I had no right to joke like that. Do you want to leave?”

Zoo wiped his nose with his head turned, tying to play it off cool to the very end. “I call the car. Or not.”

The car a quarter a mile away was smoking from the hood. If Bond hadn’t placated Zoo so much the noki would be dead by now except- No one ever calmed Zoo down... Even his brother Drew knew to simply not make him mad in the first place. What gave this dude he’d met today that privilege? He had to know more about him.

“New plan.” Zoo held out one arm threateningly. “Teach me that rick Mitch did to me last light and I won’t turn you into swiss cheese.” Zoo had to be in control of this situation, even if it mean sticking around. Since this entire mess started he’d felt like some force was nudging him down a path in life and he hated it, so was this mysterious guy really an ally? He glared at this short Hawaiian shirt noki freak who was.. decently pleasant to him always. And spoke to him like a person. And was generous. And other things, Zoo noticed the more he thought about it, so he cut that out quick.

Unperturbed, Bond went a few feet down the dirt road. “I would have shown you anyway.”

Dark Ztar switched his 50” smart tv over to what was happening on Nebula 9, chuckling at normally pacifist Z3ns and T4ien alien races driven to annihilate each other due to believing one planet canceled the other’s Super Bowl. Now aliens were using their prayer bells to bludgeon each other and their damaru to beat while marching to warfare.

That reminded him. Star warriors were such punks these days, running dragging memories he wished to bury with their stories of dark stars. Nonetheless, there was little else to do but drag himself to that terrestrial planet to only further convince himself that it was rubbish.

He first visited Toad Town, the so called capital of the Mushroom Kingdom. Bands of sailors at the boarders were charging double to ship families and throwing overboard anyone that snuck on. The citizens in the main lands were deserted and only ruffian looking people roamed the streets. The south was having internal struggles dealing with their crazy Mushroom Flu patients. Boring.

Dark Ztar was just about to leave when he heard a soft voice calling him to the East. Visiting Sarasaland he saw fighting, strife, missing persons, and devastation; some sort of grand disaster struck. He even sensed residual dark matter in the atmosphere from another dark star like him. A name flashed in his mind, but no, this wasn’t their style. It must be someone else.

Dark Ztar pushed his monocle up, humming. “Forgive me love for not recognizing it sooner, but you’ve pulled no such stunts since a millennium ago. How did you do it?” He attentively listened to the plain and dark star before him wearing only a bowler hat.

She stared at him funny. “I did something like this just the other day, silly!”

Dark Ztar paused. “Look at me. Did I have this then?” He stroked his luxurious black goatee.

“But..but..” She spun around to look at the world below, noting for the first time all of the electricity, modern plumbing, and cellphones. “What year is this?!”

“TWO THOUSAND? YEARS CAN GO THAT HIGH?!” She rose up and down in the air, freaking out. “You know, when they the banished me to this planet I found a host with special abilities. He could tap into dark matter and using him so I blew this lame dusty place off the map, but he wised up and then… I don’t know it’s confusing. I just know he died but not before he passed me on. I knew I might get stuck with ordinary people for a while, cause that makes me inanimate basically, but I never knew it’d be this long!”

Dark Ztar nodded at her plight. “Tough, love. Who’s the bloke you’re attached to now?”

She thought for a moment. “Ummmmm. There’s this boo named X or Y or Z or something and he must have been special because I woke up the moment he owned me but he was weak then. Next I know I wake up again and I’m just as strong as I was with that original guy. What should I do? Did anything exciting happen?”

“We have internet now but that’s about all that’s important. Since this insignificant planet is your oyster now it is entirely up to you,” Dark Ztar said, all dignified like.

“Wait, where are you going??” she asked the fleeting star. “I’ve been tempting high profile people to get destroyed by my portals, like old times. Don’t you care?”

“Dear, I haven’t cared since the great heroes of year 44 BCE. Your homages are charming and all, but wasting time with Earth means nothing to me. Nothing!”

Her features contort into a scowl as she rushed him. “I’m also trying to get rid of my host like before. When that boo is dead I’ll be free.”

Dark Ztar spun around, smirking. “But you are still banished here, Ms. Bellstar Doomella. Farewell.”

“You punk!” Doomella screamed after him, shooting daggers at him all the way until he left Earth. Moments later Dark Ztar would return to his layer and set back on his couch, feeling a crunch.

“Bloody capital!” His voice resounded bitterly throughout his abode as he held his even more broken cellphone. At least it was still powered on and recording.

Kylie, with toilet tissue wrapped around her head and arms like a sort of mummy approached the front desk. The entire airport was deserted and it continued to storm outside.

“I’m biting the dust soon, brother. That’s why I need five doctors with me everywhere I go. Got something for Toad Town for six?” She pointed with her thumb to the MKDCU behind her standing around at a distance, adding credibility.

The toad checked the schedule. “We’ll have a flight out of Special World to the Mushroom Kingdom in about two more hours.”

“Too more hours?!” Kylie was fixated on the video screen above that showed a different story.

A moment later a large red bird came to the window, suited in tie, and already impatiently watching the digital clock. “Yes, ma’am? Did you have a concern?

Kylie leaned in. “Mr. Albatoss, it’s Kylie, ace reporter. You were just the front desk guy when Mitch and I wrote that article. You know, the one that made the entire airline close over those tainted peanuts?”

“Words have power, brother. It wouldn’t look too good if you didn’t let me see my loved ones before I leave this world…”

Mr. Albatoss cleared his throat. “Uh, maybe we can do something. What do you have?”

“Nothing that’s a travel risk. Just, er, Mushroom Flu. Now I need a one way for six. You feel me?”

Moments later the MKDCU rushed inside the ratty economy class passenger plane, illegally they were sure. They hadn’t found seats when the plane was already lifting from the ground. Sebastian found his seat mysteriously moist, Richard had a spring stick him in the butt, Wiggletron’s head smacked the overhead luggage department, and James sat down to in someone’s lap.

Richard rolled him off onto the dirty floors. “That ain’t this crappy airplane’s fault. You’re just blind!”

Meanwhile, Kylie foot hopped in the plush leather seats when Parabilly found her in the sparsely filled first class area.

“You’d better hope we don’t get caught blackmail’n,” he said quietly, but seriously. “I don’t see why you’re doing all his costuming and fibbin’.”

He bent down to her level. “Talk to me, koopa to koopa. I know we’re hardly familiar, but you just ain’t the same from yesterday.”

Kylie didn’t even face him. “I have to destroy Zoo. It’s all I can think about...”

Kylie rushed the agents out the moment they landed, barging past anyone else. It was pouring down when Kylie saw a shiny new taxi that was parked in front of the airport.

And the MKDCU did so, huddling up around to escort her to the cab which she jumped in.

“Now it is, brother.” To Kylie’s mild dismay, the MKDCU took that response at face value, joining her inside the car. She put qualms aside and sped off while the actual cabby, a goomba who wore a neck brace, had burn marks on him, patches under his eyes, and incidentally not much change in his pocket, ran after them yelling before giving up shortly.

“I quit! I don’t care what the statistics say, Bowser’s army has to be better than this!”

With another wild rushed ride, Kylie stopped in front of a regular house in East Toad Town. It was so boring that it hadn’t even been raided by a gang, and all around was eerily deserted, left behind by the blue clad gang that got dissolved as soon as it start. Kylie jumped out without an explanation and went in.

There was only a toy box in the room to anyone not in the know. What Kylie knew however was that this was a secret passage to Shy Guy’s Toybox, which was another cover up for the secret spy headquarters guarded by Spy Guy.

Outside the MKDCU waited for a few minutes before they sent Sebastian inside. He came out empty handed.

“There’s no other doors in there so she just disappeared!” the snifit informed his squad.

Toadette used the abysmal window light to see her clipboard. She was on the inside deck of Bowser’s Doomship with across from her Toadsworth sleep. Everyone in the corner of her eye she could see some unsightly wanted posters of who was apparently an ex garbage collector of Bowser’s, Zoo Diddley. That was the criminal that had poisoned Ludwig's mind, though thinking critically as she always did, wasn't Ludwig still responsible to an extent? She guessed the military commander being their only hope for a cure canceled it out. It was weird how that worked.

Okay, roll call time: Alagold and Thomas were playing some kind of card game. Wendy was setting around listening to music on her phone and Larry was on a laptop.

Out loud she continued, “Mario, the Princess, Mr. Toadsworth, Bowser, Junior, Ludwig, Iggy, Wendy, Roy, Larry, Gold, you, I, and Dr. Toadley’s intern are on board. Russ T. was the only other staff other than Thomas working today but Mr. Toad told me he retired. Talk about great timing.”

“So we’re missing a lot of people.” Buckenberry sat a plate with a sandwich on in front of her. “Here’s that snack by the way.”

Ludwig was at the helm with Mario and Bowser. After the watery explosion, the entire area flooded with some of it shorting out the controls. Most made it on board anyway, but they were stuck with the old school method in their attempt to rescue Yoshi stranded on the castle’s roof and anyone else missing.

Peach, who was surprising many with her eagerness to help despite her home being destroyed, held her parasol while pointing to Roy on starboard side. Roy pulled his ore really hard to try to show off, but instead it slipped out of his hand to plummet into the water. With a sigh, she turned to port side where Iggy and a mechakoopa held ores. Instead of row with Iggy, the mechakoopa spat a ten foot long trail of fire down the side of the boat, scorching it black.

“Nah, it’s alright hotness. Our airships are heat resistant...” Bowser began to smile. “Though with you around it is getting a little warm here, heh heh...”

Ludwig shifted uncomfortably in place at the change of topic. “Iggy, lend me the battery from that mechakoopa, will you?” he asked, opening a control panel with lot of wires popping out of it.

Ludwig step aside and let Mario crouch down. “Be my guest plumber, but do be wary of-”

When Mario touched the wrong wire, bolts of electricity ripped through his veins, shocking him in place with bulging eyes. On reflex Bowser tried pull him away but the electricity spread to him, shocking him with a particularly goofy expression. Dr. Toadley’s intern ran over to strategically pulled them both off to sizzle on the deck.

“I’ll show up when I’m needed again.” Mary slowly backpedaled to leave the scene, just knowing she’d be important again later. Roy left too, not because he was important, but because he was lazy.

Bowser rubbed his head. “Mario?” he said groggily. “I knew you’d be best man in the wedding...”

“There was a reason why I quit that job real quick,” Mario moaned. “At least I see blinking lights again.”

Ludwig flipped a switch on the navigation panel. “Systems are on at 60%. Awaiting farther instructions.”

Bowser jumped up. “Here’s some. Turn this blasted thing around already! Some of my kids could be inside!” Bowser pulled the wheel hard. The battle cruiser took a deep turn to the right, making everyone get pressed into the rails as they sped towards Peach’s flooded castle. They crashed, shattering the stained glass mosaic of Peach and exposing the third floor. Lemmy looked up from the ‘SOS’ he’d made with crayons and Morton dropped the pocket thesaurus.

“We were left in the lurch, stranded, alone, but now we are rejoiced, happy, ecstatic!” Morton jumped on as well.

“Keep that boat right there, homeboys!” Toad came around the corner with Luigi and Daisy. They were dripping wet and covered in some kind of dusty powder. A hole in the floor was near them.

Luigi shook water out of his ear once he got on board. “Sorry we missed the welcoming party. We were draining the moat when some landmines exploded or something under the castle. The geyser shot us up into the clouds…. And then we landed again.”

Daisy spun around to face everyone, wobbling a bit with her balance. “Oh, yeah, I knew that. Say, since when did you all have twins?”

“Where’s Stan?” Luigi asked. He made the long jump back into the castle appearing again a moment later to help support Captain Toad who held to the side of his face a clothe stained deep red. Even with the down pour, everyone could see his deathly parlor.

Also white in the face, Lemmy cleared his throat. “I-it was a zapper accident.”

“Indeed! He was showing us a trick, a technique, a wonder! But then it went off right next to his face!” Morton added.

“Both of you, downstairs,” Bowser motioned to Wendy, who had joined the wet and (mostly) living on the top deck with a phone firmly planted in her hands, protected by a sandwich baggy of course. “Take Fungus Face’s look a like to the ER.”

Bowser kept silent, grinning in a way to suggest that the ‘ER’ wasn’t really an ER.
“We’re just missing dinosaur breath, right? Come on down!” Bowser yelled upwards at the dinosaur that was hesitant to jump.

Bowser whipped around to Junior, who’d been silently manning a cannon on the surface of the ship the entire time waiting for a chance to shoot it. He lit the cannon and with a boom a large iron ball shot towards the spire Yoshi was on. The dinosaur dodged out of the way just in time and with an explosion behind him, Yoshi flailed in the air and landed flat on the deck of the ship.

“What. Did. I. Tell. You. About…LIGHTING MATCHES BY YOURSELF!! YOU CAN GET BURNED AND HURT VERY VERY BADLY!”

“The special alien brain wave technology we have hidden under our pyramids.”

Bowser yawned. “Leave flower chick alone. So you don’t care that we curb stomped your lame generals, trashed your armies, probably burnt down part of your castle, and then a portal showed up?”

Daisy’s jaw was clinched in repressed emotion. “I don’t have any family that still lived around there, but those generals were like my uncles, don’t push it.”

Bowser backed off, softening a bit. “Sorry, flower chick, or Daisy I mean. Didn’t mean it like that.”

“Yeah, he didn’t,” Mario added. “He’s even sorry he stepped on your Xbox on our way out.”

Dr. Toadley relaxed on an inflatable like on gentle waters at a beach. Except that was the opposite happening...

Mario waved to him from the rail of the rescue ship and Ludwig dropped down a rope ladder for him to climb. On board Dr. Toadley ignored Bowser who looked like someone had recently punched him in the face, and walked around Yoshi’s body still laying on the deck.

“Thank you for the rescue. Did I find 100 mines? Yes I did.” He lifted his cloak where his undershirt had a bulging pocket.

Up ahead, Mario saw very faintly in their path a purple glowing star floating below the clouds...

The was stormy enough outside for Dr. Toad to hear the thunder even from his office. Before him, spread all over his scratched up desk were result papers from all of the testing on their ten patients. Electrotherapy, using gases, brain scans? Every single one was a failure. He let his head drop down on the desk as he felt all of his hopes slip away, finally clicking his buzzer that he’d been ignoring.

“Is this Dr. Toad?!” replied an angry sounding associate. “We’ve been asking ya to join us in the board room forever. Say something!”

Why did they have to be so loud? “Something. Now associate, you do NOT have to pester me constantly.”

“I ain’t a doctor! If you don’t get over here I’ll knock that door down and drag you!”

Dr. Toad blinked twice and then obeyed. Waiting in the board room where the other three he’d assembled for the team, Morris, Dr. Topper, and Dr. Goom, plus Metal Mario, all looking either tired or disgruntled.

A goomba doctor clicked a remote and the monitor behind Dr. Toad cut on. “Do you see that sir? I think it is time to let our Case X patients go.”

Dr. Toad turned around to see the news report that described Toad Town as a ‘wasteland’ over run by gangs.

“If we keep them we might get into trouble your Masterplan card can’t get us out of. Besides, I’m tired to getting hurt, my dear fellow.” Morris’s left arm was in a sling.

Dr. Toad turned back to his associates, frowning. “We have made no progress.”

Dr. Goom nodded. “I would have liked to have seen something happen myself, but don’t you think these aren’t the best circumstances to keep pressing on? If a local cure is developed sir, it is not likely to make it here.”

“If the pipsqueak has his own little plans, let em do it!” Metal Mario said, keeping himself in the dark back corner of the room with his arms crossed.

Dr. Toad yanked the cord from the monitor. “I’ll lose my father forever if we can’t figure out how Mushroom Flu affects the brain!” he blurt out before realizing what he was admitting. Everyone in the room, even Metal Mario stared.

Dr. Toad sat back down defeated. “I don’t discuss them because they’re… they’re boos. That’s why I’m a ‘Diddley’. If people knew this sort of thing, that I grew up on circus grounds, in forests, not even in the Mushroom Kingdom, I’d never gotten where I am now…” he explained in between sobbing. “I’m losing Lou to dementia. He could hardly hold a conversation on the phone and when I saw him in person, he didn’t even recognize me.”

“Fellow, there are many mad experiments that we can conduct to help with that.”

“I don’t know about ‘mad’ experiments Morris, but that’s definitely something I’d vote for if you put it up on the suggestion board,” Dr. Topper said with a smile.

Dr. Goom nodded. “I would like to assist. After all sir, every other associate in his hospital other than that giant goose is unnamed and unreliable.”

Metal Mario shrugged. “Sorry kid. That’s all I can say.” Then the metallic clone gave a start at the set of keys Dr. Toad produced from his coat pocket.

“Heck yeah!” Metal Mario cheered before he caught himself. He grunted and put the keys in a pocket, attempting to be edgy again.

Jelectro Bond glance to his left. The distance from the military grade aircraft to his target were thousands of feet. The young rookie’s heart beat out of his chest, but the last thing he needed was a bad mark on his test. The lovely Maria dressed so elegantly was beside him, going next. The early comrade at Super Spy Headquarters who could speak to him in his mother language and always cheered him on was eventually his first swing...

And so Zoo did so at request of his impatient family, as it was starting to get dark. Zoo hit the pink colored golf ball shot into a fake rock that bounced it into the water hazard. Drew told him his high score which was actually quite bad considering golf. Zoo threw the putter to the ground. This was one of the few times his family visited some out of town attraction, and it sucked. Mini Golf Fun Land of Chocolate Island? If they wanted Zoo to return, they’d have to-

“Drag him!” command the criminal mastermind shrouded in darkness. Bond was dropped roughly in the alley and flogged by the criminal's masked mooks. He would have never gotten captured if he hadn’t refused the suggested ‘run and gun’ tactic, but he was never much of a fighter and he knew the hearts of most were innocent. His backup would arrive any minute, and while he wasn’t a too close to the thromp, Agent 999 could defuse a mean bomb. Even a furious one. Either way after a little more endurance the drug cartel leader bob-omb before him and his cohorts would never again be able to plan a-

Bank Heist. Zoo read all about it while setting in his dark apartment with no lights or water. He was in an unemployed gap, a dangerous one, because that meant he got bored often. Maybe he’d try to crash with his brother yet again, but Zoo’s phone was also out so how would he call for a ride? Night night skyline of Toad Town was black, sprinkled with many lights below. Zoo thought it fruitless but said out loud anyway ‘Dear-

“Eldstar, could you have possibly picked a better time?!” Agent N fussed as he shaved in the bathroom. The half suited Yoshi deep was in paperwork even while home and off the clock, trying in vain to clear up complications caused by other ragtag agents. Bond waiting outside the door was not deterred, the Sprixies couldn’t wait any longer. This would be the first time he went on a mission without the forms he needed to make it official and far from the last…

Zoo nodded without knowing what he was agreeing to, the brisk game of ‘psychopath’ they played during the walk leaving him in a daze. The guard let them in and soon they were walking among small cabins. Zoo wasn’t sure what to think about the noki or why he’d stick with him anyway. He guessed a part of him was actually curious about if his parents were as bad as Drew warned. Another part, didn’t have anything else better to do.

Bond stopped just short of Zoo’s parents porch. “Did you say something, mon ami?”

“I don’t do autographs!!” he screamed, shaking violently with popping veins visible even under his blindfold. Hyperventilating, he bared his sharp teeth like a rabid animal before being grabbed back by another boo, this time a pink one. She gasp when she saw her son and shut the door. Zoo had almost forgotten how his mother sounded.

Bond entered the cabin while Zoo spied in from the dirty window. The house was barren, even to someone who was familiar with Dark Land’s pathetic excuse for public housing. Lou was on ratty mats asleep as if his conniption one minute ago never happened. His mother was near Bond in the middle of the room, worn down with heavy lives gracing her once completely smooth skin. The other corner had an old looking stove with a bubbling pot on it. The last item in the entire one room cabin was a wooden chest, the same one his father had when he was a child. Seeing it again was surreal. For a moment to be replace by an intense anger bubbling up.

Zoo wandered off in the wooded community in circles until a monty mole exited a cabin and made the mistake of crossing his path on a motor bike. Without thinking, Zoo sent his death ray forth. The mole tumbled over with a yelp before Zoo caught himself and ceased the attack. He watched the small mammal on the ground for a moment, hoping he was still alive. Zoo approached hesitantly..

“Bro, you’re alright?” he asked, trying to sound as innocent as possible. The mole shook their head and crawled back towards their house, leaving the bike. Zoo was about to pursue until an all black cruiser speed down the road and skid before his parents house. Two guys stormed through the doors yelling. One second later, Bond was dragged out and stuffed in the car’s truck. Zoo rushed back to the house before the exhaust fumes had cleared.

“No no no!” He shout at the closed door. He could ram the door down and make her speak if he wanted to but… He took a deep breath. He was free but why couldn’t he let Bond go? “Please Sue. Or, mom. Whatever. That guy was uh, a friend. I need to know what’s going on. What were you talking about in there?”

With his father snoring in the background he rummaged through it to find familiar contents: Some rocks known to be ancient and some kind of alien looking scrap metal. All of these artifacts came from space…

Zoo ran out and grabbed the discarded bike from the monty mole, following the direction the car went.

References:
-This chapter is NOT a remake of Mario and Bowser Frenemies Forever: Chapter 13 Mario Party, that’s why it lacks the ‘2nd Edition’ moniker.

-Mr. Destroyer of Worlds moniker is ref of ‘Power Play’, an org. fiction franchise of mine.

Created: 7/29/18, 8/1-8, 13, 14, 16, 8/27, 9/2, 9/9, 9/11, 9/20, 9/23, 10/5, 10/7, 10/8
10/11, 10/12/ 10/23

20. Mario Party 3

A toad girl skipped up the hallway pushing a medical cart with orange pill bottles. She met a noki nurse in front of room 212, a room where the door was being banged on constantly from the patient side. The blue noki with one arm in a sling stared her down vexingly.

“Thwomp, Paper Mario, Scissor thing sticker!” The girl gasped. “How could I lose?!”

The noki smirked, still holding the winning thwomp hand formation. “You’re just about the only one who hasn’t gotten your hands dirty. It’s about time.”

She fell to the ground in despair. “But I don’t work here, I’m a traveling sister!! They said volunteers didn’t have to deal with the violent ones!”

“Oh for the love of...” Probabilly groan as he pass by with janitor equipment. “Gimme that…” He took a pill bottle and went in. Screams of terror ensued but no one could tell if it was his or the patient’s..

This to Moo Moo Meadows. Go ahead and send them volunteers. The last intern doctors we hired, there were about five of the oddballs, ain’t showed up again since this afternoon so we need it. Umm, that’s it.

Jr. Troopa licked the envelope. The teenager was outside the hospital under its hooded porch while it poured. He got another scrap of paper.

I know people must write you all of the time but this is Jr. Troopa and I want you to know I've grown from the little punk that harassed you when I was younger. My parents pushed me into medical training of all things and I took a liking to it quick. You’re an expert in saving lives so I’m asking for help-

“Junior!” A ptooie plant named Vick inched towards the porch, notable for biting a difficult patient once and then being banned to only work outside.

“Two things, partner. Lookouts in Toad Town saw the baddies grouping up and heading our way.”

As Jr. Troopa groaned inwardly, someone was thrown out of the second story window above them. The koopa bounced off of the porch and landed flat in front of them on the ground. Others standing around in the area rushed to pick the old man up.

“I’m alright.” Probabilly unceremoniously got up without a scratch and even still held the broom he fell with.

The person who came around from the side of the hospital looked confused for a moment, but then shrugged and head towards Jr. Troopa. He had a clean white doctor’s coat, black jean like pants, a stethoscope around his neck, and a lamp strap to his head. His moustache was trimmed neatly and his blue eyes were deep and intense, beaming determination and hope.

“You called me at the right time since they never invite me to do anything at Smash Mansion and I just feel so left out with some of the DLC invites and being so low on the tier list and… What was I talking about?” He shook the water off of his umbrella. “Oh, right, you had a theory or something involving Mushroom Flu so I sent my partner here to hold my place. I don’t see his car so he must have gotten lost again. Oh well. I’m ready for work. What’s up?”

Jr. Troopa picked his jaw up from the ground. He glanced from his notebook with the unsent letters to the man before him. “Mario, you’re the best!” he exclaimed, forgetting his fake southern dialect. Others around echoed his statements and surrounded them quickly.

Dr. Mario smiled nervously. “Thanks I think? And it’s ‘Doctor Mario’ by the way. Me and the famous plumber only share a last name...”

Later Jr. Troopa dressed in a rain coat was scouting the territory to check how bad the baddie situation was, keeping his eyes peeled while fighting against the muddy ground limited visibility from the storm.

He face hit the mud. Satisfied, the Seaworthy Switchblade member on the bike whistled to the rest of the gang. Soon a whole gaggle of bike motors were heading closer to the hospital and community center.

In the downstairs portion of the Airship, there were five people in the back corner of the airship, the ‘ER’.

“Homegirl, are you okay?” Toad asked, across from her also on the ground with Captain Toad lying on a mat before him in a semiconscious state.

Daisy’s slowly lifted her head up. “My ‘Unreal Championship 2’ high scores are gone! Forever!”

“That sounds like that sucks,” Toad said, not really sure what he was agreeing to.

Bowser Junior, in great pain, (emotional at least) polished a cannon very loudly. “I’m hungry again.”

Yoshi, the last of the sick with an ice pack on his head, looked at the koopa child with annoyance, shrugging in a way to suggest that Junior was just eating out Peach’s refrigerator before the castle exploded.

"Don't silently yell at me!" Junior screeched. "I'm still traumatized by King Dad yelling at me!"

BOOM. Everyone felt a beat to the chest. In the rear of the ship, there was now a gaping hole leading hundreds of feet to the ground!

Morton sniffed around. “What’s cooking? Sizzling? Grilling? Me! AHHH!” Morton ran around with his tail on fire, inadvertently spreading it to the wooden furnishing.

“Stop that!!” Luigi tried to yell among the panic as the ship began to get pelted with projectiles. Everyone zipped around wildly, knocking things over, stepping on toes, and kind of hurting themselves before the enemies on the ground got a chance to.

Though all of this Captain Toad weakly grabbed Toad’s shirt, catching the castle adviser off guard. "Sir, I- I have a confession..."

Upstairs, Mario peeked over the rails to find that they passed over Baddie stations and abandoned houses equipped with bill blasters and cannons galore.

“Everyone strap in!” Bowser bellowed into a radio. He kicked the airship into the highest gear it had. The baddies below saw their target escaping and fired their biggest weapon. A six hundred pound bullet shaped torpedo tore through the sky. Mario was knocked off his feet by the crash just in time to get trampled by almost a large group covered in black soot rushing up to the top deck.

“Do you have another plan?!” Peach, who was anything but that color now, plead.

“SHUT UP! EVERYBODY SHUT UP!… If the Koopa Troop gave up this easy our names wouldn’t be in record books, we wouldn’t have made it past the first videogame, and we wouldn’t have decided to help you Mario losers out. Now strap your boots on. You’re all enlisted in my army now and the first order is!” Bowser realized how quickly they were losing altitude and his gameface waned. “Erm…”

Mario joined in arms with several others, his brother, the princesses, and almost all the toads. “Dear Eldstar, we’re in your hands.”

Yoshi was off alone when he bent his head. “Eldstar, if I survive and get my voice back, I’ll finally retire like I should have long ago.”

Dr. Toadley grabbed Mary’s hands. “Should you save us right now? Yes you should. Amen?”

Bowser didn’t have a good relationship with the stars after that whole stealing Star Rod incident so he told Ludwig to represent the family.

Ludwig bowed his head. “Dear stars above, that is right, all of you. I know you are there so help us, or else!”

“Ho ho ho! I had fallen asleep earlier, sorry.” Everyone held their breaths as a purple star materialized above their heads, the one Mario thought he saw earlier. “I am Millennium Star, and I know exactly what is going on. You have shown the wit, kindness, strength, love, courage, beauty, and mischief needed to become Super Stars, but there can only be one winner!”

“..Never mind,” Millennium Star said casually. “My friend Game Guy told me about the portal issue, so how about you help me conceal my identity until that army of lumas stop searching for me and I’ll help you all avoid meeting our demise in a fiery explosion. Deal?”

Not waiting for a response, brilliant light emitted from the star as it became the figurehead of the airship, repairing the boat, and making everything turn rainbow sparkly colors like a super star. The effects spread to everyone on the boat, making them flash and glow, and reinvigorating all of their senses.

A deep voice came out of nowhere as the airship began to lift into the sky once more. “Carry on, Mario Party! You are now all ‘Super Stars’!”

The koopalings and Junior rushed to the deck below them for war. Eight of of the battle cruiser’s cannons aimed in a downward direction and obliterated the shacks with ease, creating huge explosions and pillars of fire on land. With the ship in better shape then it was when Bower flew it to the Mushroom Kingdom this morning, it got out of the danger zone in a matter of minutes and like the fitting conclusion of a great job solved only by love and team work, everyone high five. Almost. (Peach still refused to touch Bowser.)

Zoo raced down the road on the motor bike to a flat highway. His abducted friend was only a mile away, the fleeing car restricted in it’s departure to the winding path. Zoo drove off road, roughly running over rocks, shrubs, and plants. All he could focus on was that car whose driver was an island variant boo with sunglasses. There was a plump strollin’ stu dressed in tactical wear as the passenger. The Stu agent pointed to him and then rolled down the window, firing a tranquilizing gun. Zoo felt the prick but kept up with the speeding car. He lifted an arm off the handlebars to focus on the Stu. When the enemy raised the gun again it fell from his grip as he seized up, red liquid dripping from their nose. First a drop or two, then a steady drain a second later. The boo agent driving hardly had time react before his eyes glazed over and he fell limply to the side, making the car veer off road completely. Red dust was kicked up high into the sky as they careened in a diagonal direction, finally coasting to a stop in a small trench.

Zoo opened the driver's door. The boo agent was resting on the cup holder occupied with Starman Bucks coffee, obviously his. Zoo hated hipster mega corporations on principle so he threw the boo agent’s body out to the ground. Wait, that was random. The stu agent’s once yellow skin was white and consequently his green outfit dark red. Nothing of use was on him, well, the gun might have been, but it wasn’t that effective judging by the fact that Zoo was still standing. The dash board was cluttered and modified from normal with various equipment and a hand written note that said: ‘Charles, you owe me five bucks or else. I know about your latest pet.’ Zoo ignored that and finally located the switch to unlock the truck.

Bond sprung out and took a defensive stance immediately. When he turned around he froze at the sight. “That was Agent M and 0088. They’re dead…”

“...Well sorry for flipping tying to save you! just I couldn’t lose-! I mean-" Zoo cut himself short.

"They were going push the car into the nearest lake. With me in it..” Bond explained with some rare malice in his tone. Bond dug into one of his back teeth and chucked a very tiny device in the distance. “Thank you.”

“Obviously,” Bond surprised him by saying. “I was speaking to your mother about the bell and it is from space. I hate to sound obsessed but we cannot let this halt our investigation.”

“Talk about bouncing back quick, does this guy just regularly escape death?” Zoo mused while Bond was emptying everything else in the trunk. There were chains and weapons and junkfood. Zoo might have gotten along with those two if they had a better introduction.

Zoo didn’t have to think about it. Er, he kind of was familiar with the stuffing bodies in trunks thing.

Bond paused and glanced at him oddly. “I am curious. What did you want to be growing up?”

"I always wanted to perform,” Zoo answered as he dragged the stu. “Comedy or acting with costumes. It just never worked out.. Oh, and I like hurting people so that's kind of a problem for an aspiring entertainer." Zoo felt more weightless than usual. Either the tranquilizer was starting to work, or it was the fact that no one had ever really asked him that.

“You are under citizen arrest! I know your scheme with Zoo, a trusted friend on Earth has told me all about you two!”

In an instant the fog cleared away in Zoo’s mind. They were in an urbanized area, Mushroom City. In a familiar vehicle flipped to is side from a nasty accident. People around ran and screamed as a short person blue garb was shook their fists at Bond, who was pressed against the window of a shop. Zoo crawled out of the wreckage and tried to use his powers but there was nothing. This attacker had no organic parts to target. As Zoo’s jaw dropped, Geno made a tsk noise and aimed his Star Rod towards him.

Superstar Mario was looking down from the rails on the newly repaired Doomship. He felt a bit numb, maybe even insensitive that he was the only person not buzzing with excitement, but someone had to keep calm. Away from the baddie stations, Toad Town was empty again except for a coasting taxi with sticky notes attached to the hood in the formation of ‘SOS’.

“Yo, save us!! We’re doctors!” Richard yelled upwards. “Remember us? We got stood up and we just want a ride to the south hospital!”

“We’ll volunteer!” their leader James said. “Working for our normal over priced fee ain’t worked all day or yesterday, so we might as well do charity work!”

“Can we really trust them?” Peach whispered, also remembering from yesterday.

“Sebastian, how’d them posters of yers end up over yonder?” Parabilly asked once on board, eyeing wanted posters of a certain dark boo garbage collector.

“Those originate from me. You would not be able to enlighten me would you?” Ludwig asked, his sixth sense of someone guilty coming to fruition.

The MKDCU gulped collectively. “Negative. Your captive has escaped our vicinity,” Wiggletron answered with a half truth.

Off from where that was going on, Mario was standing around again aimlessly. “Thanks for that telescope. Whoever that was.”

“No problem, Mario.” Toad, his normal self now leaned on the railing. “Someone told me something before that close call we had and I got me thinking. I interviewed a few of us just now and there’s a pattern,” he mentioned in low voice.

“Of a ‘dark star’! Homeboy, almost everyone had some sort of run in with that symbol, or hearing voices, or something else freaky today, including you! Remember what you told us?”

“I’m in the same boat as everyone else,” Mario answered vaguely, going back to scouting out. Inside he was still empty and he needed to fix that quick.

“Halt!” the young koopa cowboy said to the approaching caravan. He and the rest of the defense force guard the gate to Southern Mushroom Kingdom, a sub region just south of Toad Town.

“I hate people who make little girls cry...” ‘Booigi the Second’ bounced on the koopa’s head and sent his shell flying towards his comrades. They all fell down into the soil, where boo knocked them all out with a single slap. Booigi realized they found the area familiar but it was like those memories were locked away.

Daffodil’s phone rang. After a conversation lasting ten seconds, she began to bite her nails while handing the phone over to Chomper.

“Aye?... No, I sent the bikers before us.” He gave Daffodil the phone back. “Nothing to fret over, lass. There’s enough of us.”

Booigi wondered what that was about, but let it go. They drove on. Southern Territory consisted of flat plains with the famous Mt. Rugged in the background, partially obscured by low hanging rain clouds. The Southern Hospital was near the foot of the mountain and there was a little town set up near it with tents and other provisions for those who had fled from Toad Town. Twelve loud bikers were also circling the entire hospital.

Boo left the car last, feeling a pit in their stomach. They followed in the rear until they found a young koopa on the ground leaning against a shed house.

“Pfft. We’re the only hospital open for miles and yet your terrorist group is trying to take that!” Troopa explain like it was obvious.

Back with the others, Emery was tagging along with a random biker while Daffodil and the other two baddie leaders stood around under the porch.

“Okay, I saw we just storm in and claim the place. This is a nice building and supposedly they keep the refrigerators stocked with the good stuff.”

Daffodil poked a finger at Chomper playfully. “Didn’t your doctor warn about your liver?”

Chomper grinned. “If anything happens at least I’ll be in a hospital already, lass.”

“Excuse me.” Booigi floated up to them slowly and deliberately. “What are you trying to do exactly?”

The three played dumb. With another threatening rumble, Booigi pushed open the doors to reveal what was going on inside the hospital. A group of nurses and volunteers were holding back budging doors that went to the east and west wings of the hospital.

Dr. Mario stepped away from the resistance force. “Oh boy! This is some strong Mushroom Flu if I’ve ever seen it. They won’t respond to my vitamins, and they’re coma walking strength is twice as much as it should be. I wish Metal Mario was here.”

“Don’t let the circus freaks out,” Daffodil sneered from the safety of outside.

Emery was covered in dirt and grime and water. “That’s right!… What am I agreeing to again?”

“This.” Chomper’s battle cry made the gangs from outside pour into the hospital.

Booigi’s head spun as bikers zipped past left and right, their wet tires leaving streaks all around in their rampage. Vick swung around hungrily and took a big bite out of whoever got close with a little too much pleasure. Rou T. once again swung over the counter and started chasing baddies with that shotgun, making everyone near duck to avoid her badly aimed bullet barrage. A blooper tripped her up and she fell head first into Probabilly’s mop bucket.

Jr. Troopa used his crutches to jab at some Dry Bonez Gang members. A bone they threw back whacked a noki nurse in the face, knocking him into the wall and sending knickknacks to scatter on the ground. A toad girl hesitantly held a flower pot in her hands as she tip toed behind a cheep cheep on a bike who was just sitting there. She cracked it over his head and he fell out cold.

“Hey pretty thing, let me talk to you!” Leo the bony beetle started chasing her around. She ran and the chase went out of the doors.

Jr. Troopa had a table tossed at him by a Big Bertha. She shoved and flung nurses and volunteers of the south left and right and was heading straight towards Doctor Mario when she suddenly slipped up and rammed her head into a wall. In an instant a mounted dino rhino fell off the wall and became wedged comically on over her head.

“Watch your step, hear?” Probabilly put down a wet floor sign and then proceeded to mop again.

Dr. Mario abandoned the door to hide under a table petrified, as in Smash Brothers there were never real injuries. Here however was another story. Down the doors came on both sides allowing the ravenous sick, all red eyed and foaming at the mouth to enter the fray, attacking both MK South staff and baddie.

Emery, Nukem, Daffodil, and Chomper watched the whole thing again safely from outside.

“Lame.” Daffodil began to file her nails. “Oh well. There’s always other places to take over.”

“I don’t think so.” Everyone spun around to face Booigi. “You tricked me into helping you cause this. Now you will pay.”

Chomper laughed arrogantly and brought out his fish hook. “Have fun with that, mate.”

Booigi grabbed the five hundred pound baddie and his weapon and tossed both into the storming sky. With an Earth rumbling boom, a blinding ball of lightning came out of nowhere and collided with the spear, which struck Chomper in an explosion. Booigi brought their arm out to catch the fish took that transformed into a trident.

Emery, Daffodil, and Nukem screamed their lungs out and scattered into the rain. As Nukem was running for his life, he first thought to dial emergency services.

“Hello?! Please please please help me! There’s a lunatic chasing me right now!!”

“Mmmm, I suppose so. Maybe you should have thought about that before you joined the terrorists.”

“Terrorists??!” Nukem frowned. “I suppose got wrapped up trying to stick with these younger guys emergency person, but- but you still have to help me right? I’m sorry okay?… Umm, hello??”

A pink sticky tongue emerged out of the speaker startling him. The phone fell to the ground just as Booigi materialized above it, cackling.

Daffodil meanwhile ran into a cave that was attached to Mt. Rugged. She leaned against the side to catch her breath. Her damp clothes were making her shiver, so she took off the yellow blouse she wore in imitation of Daisy and only had an undershirt and shorts on. Without the clothes, and with her wet hair having lost the style it was in, she didn’t really resemble the Sarasaland princess any longer.

She kicked a rock farther in the cave where it was pitch black. “I should have stuck with doing impersonations in the theater and left this baddie stuff alone...”

“You should have,” a voice said from before her. A bright white flash went off and Booigi emerged from the darkness holding a Nukem’s camera. Daffodil missed that however because she was too busy wrapping her arms around herself with a flush.

“You screwball, what are you doing?? I can’t let anyone see me out of character. Don’t run from me!!”

She chased Boo out of the cave and through the mud, heading toward the little settlement until she crossed an item shop. She heard a whistle and turned to see the shopkeeper, Rowf and Rhuff, and several others there hiding in the makeshift item shop tent gazing at her half dressed.

“Looking good! I love this I Spy badge!” Rhuff snickered until Rowf smacked him.

With a high pitched squeal she ran blindly away from the men, rushing into a smelly old yoshi staple.

Emery ran around back towards the boarder where Toad Town was just a mile ahead. She had no idea how she had allowed her friends to drag her into so much trouble, but the seriousness of it all was like a punch to the face. Emery gave up and sunk to her knees.

A white orb was before her. “Somehow I remember you from yesterday. You called yourself a ‘Do-gooder’. Now look at you.”

She bent her head up towards Booigi who held the trident. “I know what I said, but just I’m a stupid teenager, okay? Kylie was right! But I can't fix this anymore. We can't fix anything anymore!” She wept bitterly in the rain.

“Stop already, idiot!” a small distance away, Leo tussled with the traveling sister toad in the rain.

“Leave her be,” Booigi zapped the trident as a warning, striking the ground and making Leo’s shoes catch on fire.

Other dry bones gang members came up, with Phil taking the lead. “We got bigger fish to fry than this baddie stuff.”

Daffodil, who wore a barrel over her body, Nukem who’s pink bob-omb skin was pure white, and Chomper who was scarred up black and covered in bandages while being pushed in a wheelchair also met them.

“Yeah. Don’t you see how dark the sky is for it to only be seven o clock? Something ain’t right,” Daffodil said.

“You could redeem yourselves by going back to that hospital and helping out.”

After a pause Emery spoke up first. “Okay, I’ll do it. Don’t look at me like that, I used to be a nurse and we honestly don’t get paid enough for what we have to put up with.”

Phil put his head back on, which had gotten bopped off again at some point. “At least we’ll be out of the rain. What do you say?” Leo and their other five or so dry bones members agreed.

“Us too. We have to make it up to you somehow,” Daffodil said. “We’ve been rotten friends.”

The paraplegic Chomper blinked his eyes twice, indicating that he had no objections.

Everyone faced the North as a large doom ship radiating rainbow colors crossed the boarder to invade Southern Mushroom Kingdom.

“ATTENTION,” came a voice from the ship originating from a speaker. “THIS LAND IS NOW PROPERTY OF KING BOWSER KOOPA… HA! Did I get you?? You should have seen the looks on your stupid faces!”

“Ah hem,” spoke up another voice that sounded like Mario. “Actually, we’re here to deliver the cure for the Mushroom Flu! Make way for our landing!”

Created: 8/7/18- 8/13, 14, 16, 9/2, 9/9, 9/10, 9/20, 9/23, 25, 10/5, 10/8, 10/12.
11/4/18

-Daisy worrying about ‘Unreal Championship’ is a self ref to my other fic called ‘Mario and Luigi enter the Wiivolution.’

21. The Power of Friendship

Bowser’s airship approached the Southern hospital to a welcoming party of Booigi, Emery, her baddie friends, the remaining members of the Dry Bonez Thugz and the Seaworthy Switchblades, the staff and volunteers of the hospital, and lastly Birdley perched on the roof.

“Welcome to Southside, partners!” Jr. Troopa waved the ship down and it descended ‘gracefully’ on top of their nearby shed house, flatting the wooden structure completely.

Probabilly nodded his head that way. “Don’t get yer britches in a bunch. I can fix it right up.”

Bowser was the first off board, mostly because everyone forced him to be. Rain poured on his head and he was just generally soggy all over, giving the very best first impression.

“I am King Bowser, ya know me. By the way, you are my new slave labor force!” he said with a toothy grin until Peach and Mario step off very unhappily with that statement.

The blue Noki ‘Laki’ punched Vick in the side with his good arm. “He means we heard you guys were in Sarasaland and that place got… you know. Its all over the news.”

“Dears..” Peach held her parasol with nervous tension. “-Just know we’re safe now.”

“Yeah and don’t worry about the koopas. We banded together for a cure and now we’re going to deliver it.” Mario noticed their allies were ‘interesting’ consisting of rednecks, random weirdos, and thugs but helping hands were helping hands and he wouldn’t judge.

Their eyes locked and Booigi instantly dissolved into a more familiar shivering blithering form. “L-luigi?! I don’t even now how I got here!” They ran up to hug the green plumber tightly, weeping into his blue overalls. Luigi reciprocated though he didn’t really get it.

Mario, Bowser, the Koopalings, Junior, Peach, Daisy, Toad, Toadsworth, Dr. Toadley, his intern, Yoshi, Toadette, Thomas, the MKDCU, Alagold, Buckenberry and lastly Luigi and Boo piled up at the front porch of the hospital where Dr. Mario gape at the approaching party.

“Long time no see to all of you!” Dr. Mario turned to Jr. Troopa beside him. “I mean, forget a few extra volunteers showing up. You sent the whole gosh darn cavalry!”

The teenager dropped his unsent letters to the wet porch with a sheepish look. “Wasn’t me and honestly” he said in a hushed normal accent, “I'm scared to go in there again. I’ve seen what they can do to you and I'd rather fly across the ocean in one go or go back to boot camp before I run in that place."

Mario and pals lightly chuckled among each other. The plumber went ahead. "Don’t worry. I’m sure it can't be that bad...OH MY-" Peeking through a sliver between boards, Mario’s moustache went limp and his knees buckled. Bowser tore off a wooden board to let everyone rushing up clearly see the disarray within.

“One coma walking patient is knocking down walls. Another is screaming and wailing like a crazed animal. One is swinging a chair around. Another is gnawing on the leg of another. A yoshi is destroying everything in sight,” Morton commentated before being slapped and forced to shut up. Either way their excitement plummeted faster than a thwomp falling off of Mt. Rugged’s peak.

Among the murmuring and confusion that ensued Bowser pulled Mario aside. “I know that’s a hot mess in there, but if something's gonna get done, it'll be cause of us and not these other losers. This is still about OUR rivalry still, or frenemyship, or whatever still right?”

Ludwig squeezed between them and scoffed. “-Am I not worthy of assisting? I am feeling audacious!”

Bowser groaned, observing the constantly jiggling door knob. “Hold the door or something.”

Toad surprised Mario by coming up. “Homeboy, whatever you decide I’m for it. I’ve already died once today technically, Dr. Toadley told me.”

“Sorry I didn’t mention it princess, I should have TOAD you all. Get it?” Toad smiled cheesily.

Iggy barged up to the front. “I have a death machine in the airship that could help with this!”

“Iggy!? Come back- Oh never mind. Everyone execute formation: balino!” Ludwig command, trying to get all the attention again. He meant to say ‘impetus’ however so
Lemmy, Morton, and Junior promptly got in a military style line and march their tails instead right to the outhouse.

Mary nudged Dr. Toadley’s side while smiling in a forced way. “No you don’t...”

“So what will it be?” Bowser turn to Mario. “There ain’t no save blocks here. Now or nothing.”

Mario’s eyes shift to his rival with a sly smile. “See you in the Overthere.”

Bowser was for a moment caught off guard but then he also flash him the ‘grin’. “You too, plumber breath!”

Ludwig pulled open the door, allowing a crew that now only consisted of Mario, Bowser, Ludwig, Iggy (holding a black tube), Toad, Peach, Daisy, Toadsworth, Dr. Toadley, Mary, Buckenberry, Daisy, the MKDCU, Dr. Mario, a few straggling baddies and bikers, a couple nurses and volunteers that weren’t beaten too badly, and Birdley (if immediately perching on the ceiling fan counted) to CHARGE!!!

It was an odd feeling to know you were supposed to be dead coming from someone who had narrowly escaped with their life in many a time during adventures, but that was the boat Captain Toad was in… That one and Bowser’s airship. Just then he was startled by Alagold plopped down on the bench across from him.

“Don’t mind me, Bro. I was uh, seeing things.” Alagold rested rather abruptly on the table.

Captain Toad ducked down as more entered the docked vessel, Yoshi, Luigi, Boo, and a few koopalings.

Yoshi grabbed a seat. “You guys try to wake up Millennium Star. I’m really tired all a sudden.”

Boo inched closer to Luigi when loud thunder boomed. “But what if that star person never wakes up??”

“Well, I saved this from the castle.” Toadette held up a rusty pot. “I can bang on it for noise. I would have had more but a certain front door guard bailed on us to join his uncle in the downtown.”

“It’s fine, Toadette. There’s enough of us to do this, we just have to be loud and annoying.”

Roy barged ahead. “Let’s get to not working already!” And so they all went upstairs aside from Yoshi who napped. Thinking the coast was clear, Captain Toad got up.

“-I say! I could have stayed in the tussle for a little longer!” an elderly voice said.

“Please chill out. You didn’t even make it inside before you slipped and fell and the Princess would worry if you stayed anyway. Set next to, er, Stan over there!” Toad motioned to Captain Toad who had no choice now but to wish he was invisible.

Toadsworth sat next to Alagold with a somewhat juvenile huff of annoyance while holding an ice pack to his bruised face. “Master Toad, take this will you? I was always meant to be a gift.” He dug in his small knapsack and pulled out an old book labeled ‘IV’, the same one that was laying next to Toad when he passed out and the same book Russ observed before going mad. It was slightly water damaged but still even had the bookmark firmly in place.

“It is a nice little read if you are in for a brain twist. It is from an ancient explorer ‘Zheng Koopa’ and all that but unfinished! It just seemed important, so I took it before the castle flooded over,” the old mushroom explained.

Toad smiled to be polite. “Thanks Toadsworth.” He leaned in on Captain Toad’s side. “By the way, relax. I get that it was an accident, homeboy. I’ll even send ya the good stuff before you get probation,” he said conspiratorially.

“Mr. Toad,” Captain Toad spoke up when the thought crossed his mind. “Your book. I explored some old ruins once. I think that might have been written shortly after old world Sarasaland collapsed on itself-”

“Like what happened to Mario and Peach? Uh huh?? So does this have clues or something? Tell me.” He shoved the book under Captain Toad’s nose.”

“’Delimited by the natural and bestowed potential by..the unshakable shadow shed by its origin’..” Captain Toad read before stopping to lean back sadly. “Sir, I’m not sure I get it.”

“But this could be important,” Toad stressed, beating the table. “….Y’all know any puzzle specialists for this book thing??”

Captain Toad leaned up abruptly. “Sir, that is highly specific but in fact I do!”

Deep below Toad Town Spy Guy handed over an updated census of the capital city. There were exactly one hundred residents left, all tucked away somewhere and undetectable to all but the most savvy discoverer.

Agent N handed over a photograph. “This was the last image taken from our satellite.”

Spy Guy lifted it closer to his face then spun it upside down, trying and failing to find any meaning behind the completely black image. “Umm, what is this?”

“That’s above the clouds right now!” Agent N replied like that was a dumb question. “I’m afraid we’ll have to-” Someone knocked with a thud sound.

Spy Guy pushed open the box flap, exposing the Super Spy HQ’s ‘office’ for what it was, a single large cardboard box located in a Shy Guy’s Toybox Blue Station.

Without a word, Spy Guy blew a dart designed to instantly debilitate any living thing at Geno.

“What a way to introduce yourself, Charles.” Unharmed, Geno flicked if off and it bounced on the floor. “So again, where is she?”

Agent N, a slim orange yoshi undistinguished from any other aside from the very nice suit he wore, crawled out of the box. “Who are you and what are you doing here?”

“Don’t worry about me Jeremy, just know that I caught Zoo and Jeletro for you guys and I need to speak to Kylie. I know she’s here.”

“Never mind, here she is.” Geno spun around as the indoors train came rolled up to the station stop, whistle blowing. Kylie Koopa was right in the caboose looking straight ahead as she squeezed an effigy of Zoo in her hands in a creepy manner.

The star warrior snapped his fingers, making his Shooting Star car and its passengers miraculously appear behind him. Seating the back seats were Jelectro and Zoo suspended inside of a thick yellow crystal. Zoo’s eyes dart over to them all and Jelectro's expression changed ever so slightly, indicating that they were both still conscious.

“Send them to the cells,” Agent N ordered before turning inquisitively back to Geno. “So you don’t even have a name? We’ve never had an uh, infiltrator quite like you...”

“I’m not from around, call me Geno,” Geno answered as Spy Guy prepared to take the prisoners away. “It would be hard to pronounce anyway. Just know I follow a higher authority and I’m on a criminal investigation of my own I guess you can say. That boo is using a bell that connected to a real villain in the sky. A Dark Star.”

Kylie stopped drooling at Zoo and Bond. “Right.. right right right. Where will they be held?” She asked flatly.

“In an ultra secure cage where Agent 0064’s public interference yesterday will be thoroughly investigated. If that boo really is the train station killer from this morning, that will be taken care of also.” He clapped two times an a shifty eyed secret agent came from a backroom riding a go cart styled like a cutesy little train.

“Get out of that thing,” Agent N snapped. “Why haven’t Agent 0088 and M reported back yet? They were supposed to be the ones bringing Agent 0064.”

“Them?! Jelectro and Zoo were in their car and there were bodies in the trunk!” Geno explained.

Agent N pulled a radio up. “Interrogate the prisoners now. Show no mercy,” he hissed.

Kylie heard the whole thing and began to laugh under her breath. Geno instead went back outside to get himself together. Rain made his blue clothing soggy as he pondered. He’d investigated the portal above to find that it was in reality a remote projection of concentrated dark matter, inanimate in every way, a killer that was neither live nor dead. He didn’t get it, where was the dark star mastermind hiding? How did Zoo become the keeper of a destruction summoning bell? Why did that noki agent risk so much to shelter Zoo? That wasn’t even touching the fact that he was supposed to be on house arrest at the moment. A great cowboy cop he was not..

He tried to enter the HQ again 20 minutes later to find something disturbing. Two things actually. He could feel another star being near, but the other thing:

Dr. Topper sneezed, almost dropping his hot tea. With that close call he knocked on the office door of Dr. Toad. “Drew, come out. I won’t bite.” His cellular shopper rung and he tucked the folders he held under his arm to answer. “Hello?”

“Hello? Doc, this is Toad the castle adviser. We just needed some help with this thing called a ‘book’.”

“Oh wow! What do you need?” Dr. Topper asked attentively, eager to be charitable.

“I’m not good with big words, but here I go.” As Toad read out loud the entire page, three more people were entering the airship.

Daisy jerked away from the nurse. “-But I’ve only been stabbed twice. Com'on!”

Yoshi grimaced when he noticed the two sharp wooden planks that impaled Daisy on her arm and leg. Daisy only ignored them and went upstairs.

Back at the hospital, Dr. Topper was listening so intently he didn’t notice Dr. Toad in the open doorway tapping a foot impatiently and staring holes in him.

A stage act in play for millennium past of actors a facsimile of their roles and those scorned..
Delimited by the natural and bestowed potential by..the unshakable shadow shed by its origin’..

“Okay so while it’s as old as you say, it doesn’t sound like a riddle, at least not intentionally. I’d even venture that the author wanted people to understand. That first part means that the stars watch over us like a stage play working out, however the text referred to someone making a crude copy of these ‘actors’ or people. The last verse about being limited, that thing is tied to the power of its owner but it can only be gotten rid of ‘shed’ by taking it back where it came from.” Dr. Topper paused. “What object are we talking about?”

On the other end back at the airship, Emery over heard the call, recognizing Topper’s voice and finding familiar the topic. Overcome with guilt she dashed out. Sebastian tapped her on the shoulder in passing.

“Where are you going?” He asked. “Believe it or not, I’m also a Boo hunter. Didn’t you work with that celebrity on something like this?”

Emery froze with one foot out the door, turning back towards her former classmate. “Kylie isn’t a celebrity and we were talking about bells, not boos!”

Yoshi leaned his head up, blinking twice in recognition of Emery. “Miss? I’m sorry for offending you yesterday, I know it seems forever ago, but if you know something you need to tell us.”

Emery took a deep breath and step back in as several eyes laid upon her. “Kylie was researching this stuff. Me and her aren’t so tight anymore but maybe mention it anyway.”

At the Special World Hospital Dr. Topper nodded, still ignoring an increasingly annoyed Dr. Toad. “Sure. She even stopped here for some reason earlier and made me catch a head cold standing in the rain. I’ll see if I can reach her.” He dropped his folder in Dr. Toad’s hands and left, confusing the toad doctor until he opened it up and found many drawings from Dr. Topper’s classroom saying to ‘Get well soon’, all addressed to his father Lou Diddley. Dr. Toad might have stood in the door way for five minutes after.

Back in the South, everyone was somewhat overwhelmed by the info dump except for Toadsworth.

The assassin took one more glance at Bond and then got lost, moving away from the sturdy cage. Agent N stooped to Bond’s level for a moment.

“-Mon ami.” Bond jolted Agent N out of his thoughts. “You are correct, I have not rebelled, joined Bowser, or have been replaced by a doppelganger.”

Agent N stood up straight and cleared his throat. He quickly check that they were indeed alone in the room. “Then why did you do it?”

Bond nodded. “I did leave to check on your niece but after many twist and turns I had to refocus. This is bigger than even us. You have to let us go.”

“I doubt it. It’s annoying enough listening to you like this at home so I won’t do it here. Bye bye.” And leaving Bond speechless, Agent N left to check in on the rest of the circus animals that were his agents.

Back in the Blue Station, a thwomp slowly step back in horror at whatever was going on in the Pink Station ahead. The bandit Agent 0069 ran screaming from there while holding his mask tight to his face. Agent N briskly entered to investigate, finding Zoo’s eyes meeting his immediately. The pink station had a playful look with pink painted walls and stuff teddy bears and building blocks for decoration, all covered with splotches of fresh blood. Agent N tried to back out before he felt a stabbing pain in his stomach. He fell to the ground and lost his lunch while Zoo cackled.

“Listen up. Bring Kylie to me or you’ll cough up more than that,” Zoo hissed, dropping the laughing act in an instant. “Get up. Now!”

Agent N dragged himself up. Zoo was locked in their special nigh impenetrable and anti teleportation jail cells, but it didn’t work against mind power apparently. Meeting back at the entrance area where his ‘office’ was were the whole team and a stationary train with Kylie still in it.

“Zoo.. wants.. to.. see.. you!” Agent N collapsed on the floor with rumpled soiled clothes. The other agents glared at him.

“Is it still bleeding? It’s still bleeding!” Agent 0069 whimpered while Agent Maria tended to his wounds, which were unfortunately for him bleeding eye sockets.

“He is right, Monsieur,” the French woman said sternly. The pink shelled Noki, Maria, put down the gauze and stood up to an approval of the remaining agents, 999, Anti Guy, Toad, and W.

Agent N got in his face, inches away from the humans bulbous nose. “We ARE HQ.”

“Of this region yeah, but not the planet. Money talks and we’re so poor we have to rent this amusement park,” Agent Toad quip.

“That is enough!” Agent N turned to Kylie. “Little miss reporter, if you wish to mix yourself with our affairs, you will obey me. Don’t even think of trying to blackmail us with your Koopa Kronicle.”

“Koopa… Kronicle?” Kylie mumbled while her old fashioned analog phone. While her mind was too clouded to recognize the caller id, it wasn’t too much to be eager to learn new information. “Hello?”

“Kylie? Neato, I knew phone books weren’t obsolete just yet. This is Dr. Topper and I’ve been speaking with some of your friends about something you were researching. I know when you visited me at my day job you mentioned a Zoo being here-?”

“ZOO?!” Kylie put it on speaker phone, which let everyone hear the call with the echo like acoustics of the room.

“Yeah him! Wow, love that enthusiasm! I never knew him, but I got a hint to check his profile. Yeah, he had a bell or something and there’s this book your other friends have implying that the bell is doing something with the sky. You’d better look into this, I don’t know how bad it is from way out in Special World where I’m at, but it sounds serious. I-”

“Hmm. No. I can only do so much from here. You’re the reporter, am I right? Take care.”

The call hung up and everything was silent before Kylie toot the whistle on the train.

“DIDN'T YOU HEAR? ZOO IS CAUSING THE PORTAL AND BOND KNEW THIS. DESTROY THEM BOTH NOW!” She threw the train into a hard reverse to go where Bond was being held. The agents scrambled to catch up, and Anti Guy and Agent W got hit and dragged along. When Kylie careened into Bond’s room, his cage was empty. Kylie jumped off and rushed the cage along with Agent N.

After a quick look Agent N spun around, eyes flaring dangerously. “Who had the keys??”

“Ouch...I gave them to… her!” Agent W used the one arm that wasn’t broken to point to Maria.

“Do it!” He pointed at her and at his call, a dart was shot at the noki. She hardly had time to realize what had just happened when the venom from the dart spread through her body. She pass away right then on colorful tiled flooring, agents around her all in shock while she herself regretted nothing. Bond, a close friend and partner back in the day did not deserve what her agency was trying to do. That, and she just knew somehow that her death would not be in vain.

Agent N looked up from her body like he couldn’t believe what had just happened. “Did anyone check on Zoo?” he eventually asked, voice wavering.

“He’s also gone,” Agent Toad answered, checking his time slip for when his next break would be.

“Find them both. They are maximum level threats at this point.” Agent N hesitated only for a moment before hitting a switch that sealed all of the doors electronically but also using some sort of force field he didn’t even understand, per strict protocol. No more entry or exiting now. Understanding this, all of the agents gulped.

22. Burning the Bridges

In the Southern Hospital the sick were roaming and they’d need to catch all fifty or so. Mario and Bowser teamed up in the lobby to focus first on an infected whomp who was in a frenzy. Slam! All knickknacks clashed to the ground. Slam! There went the rest of the drywall. Slam!

“Can I be with ya’ll?” A boney beetle with an urban accent and red bandana asked them. “I’m Leo. My buddy left me so I ain’t got nowhere to go!”

Bowser snorted. “You joined my army once and dropped out a week later. Also you smoke that stank fire flower.”

Everyone moved just in time as the whomp attack. He flopped down with an Earth shattering boom to flatten them, snapping in half a table, but got stuck that way.

Mario pricked the whomp with the cure syringe only a few of were armed with. Obviously 90% of Mario’s crew couldn’t be trusted with sharp objects. “That’s one down.”

“Squawk! Check your back! Check your back!” Birdley sung as he spun with the ceiling fan.

Bowser froze. “Plumber, you have an infected MICRO GOOMBA crawling all over your back! Sit still so I can-”

“Ooh! Let me handle this, bruthas.” Leo shot a ton of spikes that rain down everywhere. Mario, now impaled all over, tumbled around until he tripped over Rou T.’s La-Z-Boy chair. Leo scram before Bowser could strangle him.

“Yeah, yeah,” Mario muttered grimly, still dizzy and flipped over that chair, “This is a good look for me, right?..”

“I was gonna say let’s stick to being a duo, but since ya mentioned it that too! Ha!” Bowser winked.

Jelectro Bond crawled in the pitch black air duct, pacing himself when he bumped up against something. The object pulled him suddenly into its oddly chilly embrace.

Bond nodded. “It is gravely unfortunate, but we must move on. Are you with me to the end? This is it.”

Bond smiled in the darkness. “Ah- The stars aligned and I overheard an obnoxiously loud phone call from Kylie. While I am hardly at base we must have something here to work with to fly that bell to the moon. I will do that while you look for a way out of here. I figure you would rather not interact with anyone, yes? How good are you at spying around?”

“I’m so bad, when I turn invisible people can still see me.” Bad joke or not that was the plan and they were sticking to it.

On the second floor left wing, the blue toad named Buckenberry gave a swift right hook. Down the infected patient went in a heap of clothing. “Were you filming that for my Facenote profile like I asked?”

He gave a second glance at the victim, finally noticing the granny panties and dislodged dentures. “Oops.”

“Quiet. Is a patient over there? Yes it is!” Dr. Toadley pointed to an empty broom closet, listening. In a poof of smoke an infected ninji revealed themselves and sprint down the hallway. “Do I think so? No I do not!” He tossed something which exploded in the hallway, filling it with smoke that didn’t bother him while his two companions choke. The ninji however made it down the stairs and the eccentric doctor was prevented from following due to someone grabbing him.

Then with a breeze the smoke cleared out in seconds and the world became breathable again. Mario showed up out of nowhere behind a large whirling industrial blower. “I was just passing through. Are you guys alright?”

“Thanks Mario,” Buckenberry said, letting go of Toadley. “I’ve always been a fan..”

Anti-Guy was in the maintenance area’s storage room were it was dark and illuminated only by the glowing power hungry television screen and terrestrial sonar.

“Stop running up the electric bill, idiot!” Agent W barged in, hardly fitting in the narrow space. Anti-Guy in turn pinched a pressure point on his shoulder relentlessly. “YOOOOW!” Pain rippled through W’s body for five seconds before he was pushed out of the room with the door slamming shut.

Bruised mostly ego wise, Agent W traversed dim corridors to reach the Blue Station where Agent N was standing around the sealed doors.

“Finally someone. Watch this while I take a leak okay?” the yoshi asked right away.

W stood around pouting until he decided to peek into his superior’s snack stash in the office box thing. It was the usual tasteless vacuum sealed stuff, so he stood by the electrified double doors with nothing to do until an intruder came up. “Hey it’s-”

“Didn’t I see you earlier today at Special World’s Applebys?” Zoo asked. “You were that cook in the back.”

W sized Zoo up, being quite larger. “Don’t remember ya but I wish I would have. Your boss Bowser brought down FungusUp yesterday and I had good stock there.” W smirked at Zoo’s dumbfounded look. “I did some personal digging on you, see? And I know your full story. Our databanks are the bes- Erk-!”

Zoo struck him with the agony beam before the sentence ended. He came to and stopped the invisible assault. Agent W collapsed at Zoo’s feet, bleached aside from blood originating from his ears and nose. Zoo poked his body but he never woke up again. He eyes lingered on W for a second, sweat gathering on his forehead, before dragging the body a little ways into a dark and unoccupied room. With that panicky moment over he returned with W’s radio. It exploded like a small bomb when Zoo toss it at the electric field, setting off smoke alarms and sprinklers which freaked Zoo out again. The way out wouldn’t be the front door, he decided.

Agent N suspected trouble if he took too long walking around the building to the only known restroom. Now the sprinklers were on and everything. Even more there was a faint pink hue in one of the water puddles, then dry blood trial leading down the hall into the closet. Cautiously he took a peek inside before jumping back at the sight. Someone tap him on the shoulder. Anti-Guy appearing to be quite flustered.

Dark Land commander Ludwig led his squadron of Lemmy, Morton, and Bowser Junior, plus Jr. Troopa, Laki, and Phil like soldiers into battle, systematically kicking open doors and dealing with whatever was inside. When Ludwig was about to kick open door of room 400, the door kicked him! The koopaling was launched backwards until a large tentacle caught him and pulled him back in. He screamed for his life while his claws scratched the floor.

Bowser Junior gasped. “I’ve seen enough of Iggy’s cartoons to know where this could go!”

Lemmy turned to Junior. “Did you get past the parental lock on the WiiU? Or use the laptop?”

Morton beamed. “Because if so that explains the viruses, the malware, the technical support people that hold your computer hostage and demand you to pay them in Fleabay gift cards!”

“Gah! Move out of the way so we can help him!” Jr. Troopa shoved aside Bowser’s kids to rush in. This patient room had a family of sick bloopers floating around in the air and a giant one holding Ludwig helplessly upside down near the window.

“Anyone hungry for seafood?” Phil asked. The dry bones got a mean look from Troopa. “What?”

“I’ll get the small ones,” Laki said. The noki used his short stature to dodge around and poke some of the bloopers with the cure before they could retaliate.

“Stand clear, I’m gonna launch missiles!” Bowser Junior almost lit a match to prime his pocket bill-blaster until the words of his father echoed in his mind. “Oh no I can’t!” he cried dramatically. “It’s not safe and I could get hurt very badly.”

Jr. Troopa used his wings to dodge the bloopers. “I’m glad you’re taking responsibility.”

“-Which is why,” Bowser Junior continued, “I’ll let you older people do it. Here!” He handed the heavy weapon to Jr. Troopa. “You’re an adult, right?”

Jr. Troopa accepted a little too gleefully. “Uh, close enough. I turn seventeen next year!”

Jr. Troopa fired without the safety being on. The extremely pressurized blast shot him backwards out the door and his target was sent the opposite direction, crashing through the walls. CRASH. Both koopaling and squid landed right on top of a perfectly restored shed house and flattened it. Again.

Outside Bowser was coming around the corner and saw the crash site. “I don’t even wanna know.”

Spy Guy and Agent 0069 occupied the pink station, a long wide passageway with train tracks on one side and trenches of sorts Spy Guy designed to ensnare an enemy if one would be kind enough to come along on the other.

“I understand N, over.” Spy Guy terminated the radio session. “Wow, I can’t believe Rodney would do that. I knew he was weird but...” Spy Guy stood up from his invisibility cloak. “Hello?? 0069?”

0069 leaned back against a little podium against the tracks. “Huh? Didn’t hear you. Check this out.” He turned his phone towards Spy Guy. Displayed on it was some sort of web page involving ‘Toadettes gone wild’.

Spy Guy frowned beneath his mask. “Idiot.” He was about to go back when- Wham! Knocked off his feet, Spy Guy fell forward into a sandbag. Quickly he reached for a weapon on his hip to find his tool belt empty. “Help!” he screamed to Agent 0069 who pretended to hear nothing.

“Too late.” Right behind him, Jelectro Bond snapped the slingshot in half. “Now, mon ami-”

Spy Guy sprung towards Bond, tackling him down. “Friend, huh??” He punched Bond in the face. “Why does Jeremy always-” Punch. “Treat you-” Punch. “Better than ME!!!” He socked him a fourth time, stopping to take a breath. “I’m his secretary but does he call my personal cell while I’m on vacations??”

Bond rolled out of the way to miss Spy Guy’s kick, simultaneously getting hit with that feeling again- Spy Guy was under the control of something! He dodged to avoid a poison dart. The sand bag behind him ruptured and fine yellow dust filled the air.

Spy Guy ran out of his own maze to escape the sandstorm. Near the tracks he did a double take. Where Agent 0069 once sat was instead a small chain-chomplet wagging its tail excitedly.

“Mr. Snuggle Buns?!” Spy Guy dropped everything to run up and hug his lost pet. “It’s Trevor’s fault. If I knew he was taking you for bomb sniffing-”

Bond cut the ‘touching’ reunion short by whacking Spy Guy in the back of the head. He fell out cold and the illusion shattered. ‘Mr Snuggle Buns’ was actually Agent 0069 blushing a lot.

“I apologize for incorporating you into that trick. Have you any clue of secrets here at base? Say, something similar to that lost satellite?” Bond avoid eye contact for reasons.

The bandit shrugged, easing back into his lazy position. “Not sure if this helps but I stay up all night so sometimes I hear coming and going near the red station.” He returned to his mobile videos.

“Oh but thanks for earlier, Jelectro. I don’t what happened just then but no one ever hugs me voluntarily!”

Bond thought he heard a train whistle. “Andrew, move out of the way!” A gush of air blasted Bond backwards. With a roar the locomotive sped through the station, making Agent 0069 splat like a bug. Bond felt punched in the gut figuratively yet more painfully than anything Spy Guy had delivered shortly before.

Peach picked up a sweat rushing around the hospital curing whomever they could. With her was a toad girl, a Daisy impersonator, a bob-omb buddy, and a Boss Bass in a wheelchair- Quite the bunch.

“What’s Daisy’s favorite flavor of mushroom?” was Daffodil’s fiftieth trivia question.

Peach got between her and the uncomfortable toad girl. “Do not pester her anymore.”

“Then what’s your’s lass?” Chomper’s gaze lingered on Peach from behind. Before she could reply a patient sprint past them into the dark basement that was ahead.

Nukem step ahead of the group. “Let me trudge forward fair maidens.” Peach tried to call him back but down the bob-bomb went.

“He’s always ‘white knighting’, don’t mind him,” Daffodil said, looking around shiftily. “Psst. Real quick, I missed Daisy’s game yesterday so if you happen to know like, any sweat droplets that hit the ground… Ooh! Or any strands of hair lost and where I can find them?-”

Chomper got Daffodil to back off. “Aye, forget that little lass. I just thinks the blonde one raises me sails if ye know what I mean.” He grinned.

Before things could get any more awkward, Nukem climb out of the basement covered in layers of medical gauze. “I should have known those minions booby-trapped this baaaaassssmeeeent!”

A stampede of little critters, goombas, buzzy beetles, swoopers, and shell creepers rushed up the steps. Running away, everyone rounded a corner where Iggy wandered about aimlessly, impeded by a sign on a closed door that said: ‘Clean’n goin’ on. Wait a sec, hear?’

Iggy took notice of the hoard. “Ooh, I have a death machine for this!” He presented a small black tube that looked a lot like an internet controlled virtual assistant.

“Moshi moshi, Koopdrandia desu? I await your command beautiful Iggy-sama!” it greeted.

“Whatever it is, I hope it can save us. Please tell us what to do!” Peach plead.

“Aaa! Mushroom Flu infectees can become disoriented from sound due to their senses being amplified! Fufufufu!” advised the machine.

Iggy scratched his head as the baddies surrounded them. The goombas and swoopers bared their fangs while buzzies and shell creepers snap their jaws ravenously. “Who knows the most loud band ever? I don’t think my vocaloids will count.”

Peach’s hand shot in the air. “Play the Boo-Circle Jerks!” A song called: ‘64’ed (Good as Gameover)’ blasted from the virtual assistant just in time to throw the infected into confusion. Everyone step into high gear pricking the sick with the cure which thankfully had a sleep inducing agent in it too. Peach and the toad sister cheered together when Daffodil incidentally got in the way between them and got knocked down.

“No, not that. Two people that know Daisy just TOUCHED ME.” Daffodil happily fainted.

Chomper wheeled up to Peach, patting his lap with a mischievous twinkle in his eye. “Why don’t ye ‘faint’ right here? Har har.”

“What a creep, even by my standards.” Iggy packed away his ‘death machine’ that, for the first time ever, actually wasn’t.

The green station is where Agent Toad put up a few cans of soda in a locker, smuggled before the ban happened. He’d been playing the slots with Agent 999.

“C'mon!” he exclaimed when he lost again. “I hope we move on from this soon. I kind of wanted to leave the country you know? A movie’s going to be shot in Sky Land that could use a generic toad number forty two and I’ve been here all day. My feet are tired.”

Agent 999 raised a thick eyebrow. “Want a cookie, child?” the aged thwomp teased. His personal coin case was heavy.

“Shut your face.” A moment later Agent Toad spot a dark boo that appeared out of nowhere.

“Open that locker!!!” Zoo demanded, meaning an overstuffed looking one. “I mean… please?”

Agent Toad reach for the alarm button and Zoo had to do something. He wasn’t sure what, but it was something alright that happened... The young toad crouch down like to vomit only instead out of his mouth slid a small pink sack that dangle over the floor, still attached to his insides by a thin red cord that ran down his throat. Zoo was as taken back as the other person in the room he hardly noticed. The thwomp was backed into the corner with shallow breaths.

“Then just stay out of my way.” So Zoo pick the lock on his own. Out of Agent Toad’s locker spilled tons of manila folders that covered Zoo up to his head. “Oh, cool, I didn’t expect that,” he mumbled from under the pile, focusing on one paper in particular.

Enclosed is a schematic of your newly renovated base. You are to figure out where we’ve relocated the bathrooms, extra closets, and jacuzzi on your own. Have fun, it should sharpen your skills.

PS. Where do you hire some of your weirdo agents? One admitted to being a shoplifter, another said he shoots goonies out of the sky for fun, another.. literally said you hired him off the street one day. Anyway, take your map and hide it well:

The MKDCU finally took a breather after the noise they’d caused before. None of the first floor rooms had doors anymore due to being knocked off the hinges, their signature style. Dr. Mario, who was with them taking the place of Sebastian, marked off a check list of rooms in the front lobby, stunned at the results. “We’re off the charts! Er, well mostly because this hospital’s records are incomplete and drawn in pencil, but still!”

“Yep. Who needs proper documentation? Hey, we missed that one.” Richard spot a stray yoshi running in. Parabilly tackled the dinosaur down.

“I got the lil rascal! Uh oh, spoke too soon fellas!” Parabilly got slurped up in their jowls.

“Release our old and annoying but valued friend,” Wiggletron warned. The small dino made a run, heading outside into the rain.

“We have to save him fast. Even though yoshi’s can’t digest koopas, that doesn’t mean she might not try!” Dr. Mario lead the chase that went out and through the shanty town surrounding the hospital. They even pass Bowser’s Airship, which had a small group of people in front of the bow.

Luigi, Daisy, Roy, Larry, Wendy, and Boo watched Toadette bang her pots and pans in an effort to wake up Millennium Star, whose dormant form was attached to the vessel only as a curious decoration.

“Okay, now it's my turn. Watch my sweet moves.” Larry said, glancing in Daisy's direction. The brunette barely paid him any mind, instead wrapping up her knuckles in preparation for something.

The fifteen year old Koopaling kicked the side of the ship, making only a small knock. He hopped away with a bruised toe just as company arrived.

Roy threw his hands up. “Skip my turn. I just wanted an excuse to get out of working in the hospital.”

“Yes, here. Drop me. No, not there!” Ludwig’s slime covered body fell roughly over supply barrels that surrounded the ship, specifically landing on some broken ones with sharp edges.

“My bad,” muttered Vick. “Here’s yer Prince, partners.” The ptooie plant snickered as he left.

Wendy rushed to her brother. “What is this icky stuff all over you?! You're totes disgusting!”

Ludwig’s eyes opened slowly. “Excuse my disheveled appearance, sister mine.”

BOOM BOOM BANG! SNAP! Daisy plowed her fists into the front half of the ship making a lower support snap. Down came piles of wood landing everywhere except on Daisy. “I'm so flipping sorry!” she exclaimed, on the verge of tears.

A barrel overturned from the wreck, revealing Luigi. Others followed except for one. “We’re alive, don’t worry but... Boo?… Boo?!” He gasped at seeing Boo’s short little tail from under some heavy artillery.

Larry, Wendy, and begrudgingly Roy all helped Luigi clear the weaponry. Boo was awake but with a large discolored knot on their forehead.

“Don't fret, everyone,” Boo spoke in an unusually deep and gritty voice. They marched pass everyone's shocked faces to approach Millennium Star atop the pile. “By the power of Eldstar!”

The sky flashed as a blinding bolt came down. There was a spark and soon the wreckage was on fire, red flames persisting despite the drizzle and it spread to parts of the ship.

No one had time to process the rapid events when their attention was brought to Jr. Troopa in the distance loudly rounding up others for a meeting that was to occur at the hospital.

“I will drag along my own to check that out while you and your people handle this,” Ludwig said without looking back.

Luigi found his abrupt shift to helpfulness unexpected yet appreciated. His boots squeaked were he rushed inside the burning ship. “Everyone out!” Toadsworth took the hint right away.

“There's a fire so you need to wrap it up to go!” Daisy shook the table violently, waking up Alagold and Yoshi as smoke gathered at the ceiling.

Yoshi’s eyes weighed heavily. “But.. wait. Toad..went into town for me...”

Boo was into the fields where they once terrorized a few baddies, fixed towards the sky, captivated by ‘something’ above with a pull like force. Up and up they went on the road that spiraled around Mt. Rugged. Clouds hugged the rock’s midsection, closely shrouding all above it like a curtain waiting for someone to reveal its secrets of the heavens.

“Where you’re head’n partner?” Whacka, a curious blue creature that lived up there nice and settled yet isolated, asked the distracted boo.

The entire sky was deep black and the closer they got the more insufferable the wind became. Swept up entirely they were by the strongest unnatural gale and then it was all over for the little boo..

Mario gave a start, as did others in the group surrounding the hospital. The rain falling from the sky was diluted with something dark. While they were focused on that, around the building came Metal Mario, the metallic partner of Dr. Mario.

“How many times you babies wet yourself? Just kidding!” After hacking up a laugh he targeted in on Mario Mario like a guided missile to deliver a bone cracking handshake to the middle aged man.

“Oww… Glad to see you too I think. Oh Eldstar, what now??” Mario noticed due to a particularity bright lightning flash that a futuristic helicopter that was parked right where the twice repaired shed house was. Surprisingly the architect shrugged.

“See, cooked up a better one anyway,” Probabilly explained, pointing at a structure to the other side of the hospital, a cabin that was split down the side with one half being old western style and the other modern and cubist. “Couldn't decide what to make it, but stop that drooling! This place is just for tools and not yer hootenannies!”

Metal Mario shoved others aside for a better view. “Does that place got a spa? I call it!”

“Pssst,” went Dr. Mario, clearly embarrassed. “Why didn’t you show up before?”

“I should say the same to you, softie. The mix up don’t matter cause point is, ten more patients fresh from the Special World Hospital are in there. Have fun,” Metal Mario went on before the MKDCU storm the helicopter with him getting caught between them. His head was buried in the soil while everyone listened closely for blood curdling screams but got nothing. The squad came right back out one minute later without a scratch.

“What a let down. They were all asleep,” Sebastian noted, dragging his feet.

“Thanks again for the help partners, (and for taking out that scary metallic dude) but first here’s our due.” Jr. Troopa whistled and reluctantly, all of the staff lined up to pour the coinage into the MKDCU’s hands to their bafflement.

“I’m finally going to Club 64 in say, five more years when Toad Town rebuilds itself,” Richard said, rubbing the coins under his nose.

“I call the drivers seat!” Sebastian was the first in the new van they’d acquired. The MKDCU were officially done for the day.

“…. Isn’t that OUR van they just took?” Laki asked, eyeing the car sprinting away in the mud.

Jr. Troopa pulled him his way. “Who gives a hoot? It’s over! We did it ya’ll!”

“Good work, ya idiot plumber!” Bowser slapped Mario to the ground hard, his signature way of expressing himself which the plumber didn’t really mind given the moment.

“And thank this handsome guy right here!” Rou T. pushed Dr. Mario forward to the latter’s bafflement.

“That is appropriate,” Ludwig had to speak up. “The cure would not be here without his past research on the Mushroom Flu.”

“Thanks,” Dr. Mario replied genuinely. “But are you implying you caused this new outbreak?”

And then in Ludwig’s mind a record scratched. A violin string broke. A bum key was hit. The backing track shut off. The guitar fell from the strap. Insert some other musical gag here.

Bowser nearly melted under everyone’s collective gaze turning to him. “Uh…what my brat meant was, er- We all make mistakes okay? Everyone’s alive ain't ya??”

“I believe em,” said Probabilly, back to his janitorial chores on the porch. “And you can use the new shed for one little hootenanny this time. You’d just better clean up after.”

All of a sudden Bowser really liked that old man, namely because due to that announcement it no longer seemed like the local hillbillies were going to knock his block off rodeo style!

“There you are finally.” Agent N found Kylie in the maintenance room near the parked train on the tracks. Kylie’s skin was now darkened and her eyes pierced through him. “-Uh, I was going to say that I’m letting you go. I’m about to get Higher HQ involved and-”

Kylie blinked. “DO NOT. The ones we seek are very close.” She tilt her head towards the passage out. “Be ready right there.”

N just happened to check his pda. Somehow all systems were now on, even one’s he hadn’t touched. Unlike his usual self he wasn’t bothered by this. Not bothered at all.

Bond and Zoo met again, this time in the open hallways. “Updates? Yes?” Bond held a grenade snatched from Spy Guy, tossing it a short distance and catching it.

“Yeah because I did your job. Where’s this??” Zoo excitedly shoved that map in Bond’s face. Shy Guy’s Toy box formed a circle with the colored stations with a center area defined as ‘launch site’.

“Hmm. We should be able to access it from any of the stations but let us try the red. While you were doing my job, I did yours! We can leave from there after launch.”

Zoo rolled the map back up. “You know I did have to deal with people anyway, and it wasn’t pretty.”

Bond lead the way, carefully rounding corners. “At least you did not mean it. Yes, I know it was Waldo, Sonny, and Lt. Stone. You are that transparent.”

“Apparently, except when I’m trying to be..” he replied before accidentally bumping into his companion.

Up ahead were faint red lasers stretching from one end of passageway to the other. Some were still but others periodically moved around.

“Neat, this is like in a movie!” Zoo was pulled back before he got diced. The lasers shifted their position, making the previous safe space impossible to cross.

“Cover your ears.” Bond’s grenade roll under the lasers with only a hair’s width to spare. It blew up on the other side, taking the door, the wall, and the security system with it. Bond noticed Zoo speaking to him quite eagerly about something but without sound. It occurred to him then that he forgot to cover his own ears..

Bowser lean back in Rou T.’s La-Z-Boy, staring at the drab hospital front lobby that was still torn up from earlier events. It was night. The patients were all tucked in bed for the slow recovery and volenteers had packed up. He knew Dr. Toadley and crew did, most of the gang members, and even Dr. Mario, except Metal Mario who wanted some of that hootenanny action. Or just more alcohol. Bowser himself skipped the party so it was just chill time. It was weird, but he felt kind of good about things.

“Yeah, Peach. I used to be a carpenter once. I can get your castle rebuilt in a fraction of the cost of some licensed professional!” a voice near said.

Outside, a figure approached the hospital. Mario watched them come closer before he sprint to their aid. Shivering harshly the green plumber trudged in the rain before Mario scooped him up. He knew Luigi had trek towards the mountain looking for Boo, but it was now so dark it was like Mt. Rugged disappeared and Luigi was alone.

Luigi grabbed on to his brother with jittery hands, his eyes clouded and empty. His voice came out with the softness of the wind. “...It’s here.”

They were getting closer to red station when like a clap of thunder, something black and spidery that resembled lightning crawled from around the steel air vents above to bring them down. Bond and Zoo had to dodge forward into the room ahead to avoid the collapse which was actually the maintenance room.

Bond felt the hair on the back of his neck sizzle as a flame jet shot just inches from above. Without sunglasses on it nearly blinded him to see that Agent N was wielding it. “I’ll take him while you find Kylie,” he told Zoo through gritted teeth. He himself threw something grenade like across the ground to fake out N. The fire stream halt just long enough for him to make a move.

Zoo went straight for the train were he thought he heard her but there was no koopa reporter there, only her weird little puppet of him. It was hand stitched and, wow, no one had ever done that for him so in a morbid way he really liked it enough to take along. That was a mistake. It disintegrated in his hand, spewing dark matter in a floating form like a fog. Some got down his throat and he coughed, opening his eyes to see the whole world growing dimmer.

Kylie bent to his level. “RIGHT HERE, MORTAL!” She sent him flying into the train. She made some of the roof fall on him too, resulting in sheet rock falling and pipes bursting. She caused so much damage some of the outside rain water could trickle in.

Agent N punched Bond with the hand not on the flame thrower. They were tumbling around on the other side of the room near the cage but Bond refused to let up the tug o war, even with his black eye. Agent N step back peddle on the durian, the object Bond had actually tossed earlier, losing his balance and falling with his back against the cage. Bond thought he had an opening and lunged forward but N expertly kicked the fruit upwards, spiking Bond in the face. Once fruit was swatted to the floor the next thing in his face was the barrel of the flame thrower.

“T'as pas de couilles!” A silenced pistol was now aimed it at his roommate. Bond made a dire realization. He was the one aiming the cold steel!

“You think so, huh?? I will turn you to ashes right now, agent!!” Agent N hiss, tensed and eyes dilated. His rigid stance said that he was ready to incinerate yet the wavering of his voice conveyed something else.

Kylie opened her palm revealing a blue wick. She motioned upwards and the entire train lifted and moved to the side, revealing only rubble. She step closer to make sure Zoo was underneath where she could finally acquire her prized bell, in fact, after lifting a ceiling panel, there it was! The glowing yellow noise maker was just laying on top of the rock. She dove for it only for her hand to be caught by something.

Zoo revealed himself. “Try again, sis. Heh heh!” He twisted her arm and flung her body across the floor, sliding all the way near whatever staring contest was going on at that cage.

“Go forth old chap,” Anti-Guy calmly spoke in an unexpectedly posh English tone as he held Agent N against the cage by the necktie. The yoshi wasn’t resisting, only standing normally but he chose to let the dark shy guy think he was really doing something.

Bond dropped the gun. “I’m sorry to say no, Jeremy. All of us, even myself for a moment, were being exploited!”

Bond moved just as Kylie’s shell bang up against the cage with a huge clang. She sprung up, sending forth black lightning that dart across the air at Zoo. He vanished just in time. Her head snap Bond’s way with her eyes flashing. She bent to throw the durian at him with super human strength but failed. She tried again but the fruit refused to stay in her hands.

“A distraction.” Zoo appeared behind her, hitting her with full force of his death ray that threatened to split her molecules apart. She fell and from her pores oozed a black mist that form into a cloud above.

The matter dissipate into the walls. Right away the lights went red in the room and alarms blared. ~Poro 13 Launch Initiated~

Bond pressed his ear to the wall. “Eldstar, she’s going to prevent the launch to the moon!” He ran for the red station on his own.

“She? Kylie or that dark star person??” Zoo rolled Kyle’s body to find that she still breathed.

Agent N stood over Kylie before carrying her in his arms. “What was Jelectro talking about with the moon? There’s no moon up there.”

“Don’t you guys know?” N said as other survivors were pouring in, no matter how unlikely.

A concerned looking Spy Guy climbed over the rubble from the hallway Kylie had destroyed. With him was 999 and even Agent Toad on a stretcher who survived because 999 was an army medic. The surgery wasn’t pretty, but thwomps did lack arms...

“No one told me about a rocket,” Spy Guy said. “And were are you going to launch to? The void above?”

Agent N sigh, still carrying Kylie who slob on his shoulder. “Let’s follow. Go go go!” He stop. “Oh, and let Rodney out, whoever has a key.”

“The office is closed, plumbers!...” Bowser watched as Mario sat Luigi down in some chairs. “What’s gotten into him?”

A glass jug began to vibrate on the desk. It shook until it fell and shattered on the floor. The sound of rain pouring transformed into a low roar then in the distance they began to hear a series of low thuds in the distance. Mario ran outside in time to catch sight of a yoshi carriage engulfed in flames.

The noki nurse dropped to the ground and rolled. A random doogan passerby splashed some water to little effect. Mario ran over to pat out the flames with his own natural fire resistance and soon the nurse was blackened but safe.

“Thank you but no time to talk!” Laki ran right back into town were every other building burned. Giving the skyline a warm orange glow were rows of settlements up in flames, houses, shops, tents, and even the new shed house. The entire town was out on the streets in panic.

Yoshi nearly knocked Mario down rushing his way. “I think that monster is back!”

“Listen. The black star monster, the thing that made us mute this afternoon? It was flammable and that’s how we survived. Now notice something wrong?” Yoshi waved his hand in the oily substance that continued to rain. “The fire and rain are working together. We can’t put this stuff out if it combusts.”

“-Mr. Mario!” Captain Toad ran up wheezing. “I don’t know if they can make it!”

Captain Toad’s voice became a hardly audible squeak. “Mrs. Toadette, that desk lady, Jr. Troopa, Daisy… and Mr. T-toad!”

“Yoshi!” Mario called out, but his long time buddy disappeared in the crowd.

Mario hardly recognized Metal Mario next. His silver body was now a reddish orange. “Sup, cry baby. No wait. I’m sorry. I’m not usually this insensitive. Oh wait, yes I am. Well I’m going in for a cold shower. Can’t save people from burning houses if my skin can also give em third degree burns. Later...”

Now it was all up to- Wait, it was always up to Mario, and he’d step up to the challenge like any other time. He had to do something drastic.

“Where are you going?” he asked Bowser who walked by. Mario must have daydreamed for just a second, yet this was exactly who he needed.

“Finding my kids,” Bowser said over his shoulder. “You know. To fight this thing.”

Mario caught up with him. “Good. It’s up to us anyway because, well, it’s about us right?”

Bowser kept walking ahead with his face forward because he didn’t want Mario to see that he couldn’t help grinning from ear to ear. They soon found the koopa kids near the original airship landing spot.

“Vater, I expected you here. We salvaged these items.” Ludwig stood before much armory salvaged from their airship which was only a skeletal frame at this point. “We await further instructions.”

“Uh, well. Use the same old same old tactics. Blow the heck up whatever’s up there!.” Bowser command. Mario braced himself.

Boom! Boom! Bang! Boom! Bang! Bang! Eight fiery cannonballs shot upwards simultaneously, leaving a long snake like trail in their wake. Everyone spotted the little disturbances in the clouds where they’d fired before the ‘sky’ retaliated. Down came a gush of flames that knocked all of the koopa kids back. Right before the molten mix hit Mario and Bowser, time seemingly stop for them both.

“Aww crap, not my best idea. If this was gonna be it I would have been nice if Peach was around. Any last words? Mine is that since we were in an alliance I technically won today. That’s right plumber. Besides, I did all the work,” Bowser added with a playful nudge.

Mario thought for a moment, though in reality this happened instantly. “I didn’t think this would really be it.. I’m just glad I did right thing I guess. My last words will be-” Mario did a V sign with his hands, cheering up instantly. “Thanks for playing my game!”

FLOOSH. Swallowed were both eternal rivals by the greedy hand above. The blast finally beat the doomship into a flat pile of rubble, but from the flames arose…

The Millennium Star. See! Alive, glowing, radiant! “Ho ho, what has transpired here?”

Luigi used the last of his energy to crawl beneath the radiating star with his head upwards. “I just… want you...to know… I… believed….” The green plumber’s eyes closed slowly.

The red station was compact, blisteringly hot, and rumbling. Bond stumbled upon a ladder leading to a crawlspace above, also a locked door. He glanced upwards. “You are the dark star. Yes?” He waited for a response. He got one, but not the one he expected.

“Jelectro!-” Zoo choked on the rest of his words. His face was entirely wet from sweat and tears. “We can’t do this anymore!”

“GIVE IT UP. ALL OF YOU AND THE BELL HOLDER WILL PERISH HERE,” the deep voice boomed, making those entering the room yelp.

Agent N pushed him and others ahead anyway. “You all take that ladder out. You hold her.”

Spy Guy was given Kylie to hold, to his dismay. “Agent, what are you going to-”

Evacuated were everyone but Bond, Zoo, and N, the last of which went into the room connecting the red station to the rocket’s secret chamber. Right after, noxious fumes and smoke pour into the red station. While the intercom spout out error messages, the vibrations in the room grew in intensity like an earthquake.

Bond grabbed onto the wall for support. “We’re running out of time. I can fly this myself if you give me the bell.”

“No no no! I can’t like, lose you!” Zoo paused. “I can’t lose you bro…” he repeated, easing back into himself. “I might as well own up for my mistakes. This day was pretty awful but pretty great too because of you. Outside of all of this bell stuff, why did you really want to be my friend though? I mean at first?”

Bond took a deep breath. “I am tormented constantly by accidental intrusions on the thoughts of others, it is why I must keep busy. I noticed the first time we met was.. different. But, that’s not the only reason, mon ami. I actually like you.”

“We’re losing power! Come on!” Agent N shout from inside that chamber. With a gas mask on he man the computers, enduring hordes of technical glitches.

The rocket chamber within had smooth but rapidly cracking concrete walls with LEDs lit from top to bottom, reflecting on the silvery space age looking rocket that stood 100 feet tall. The four engines above them, each the size of a large car were already hot enough to distort the air around them and the general ambient temperature of the area was nearly unbearable. Despite this, Zoo phased them both right through, where the inside was breathable again. Zoo looked around astonished. Meters filled the interior and bucket seats were mounted vertically. Bond hit something that officially made the take off ready.

An innocuous suburb above HQ caved in on itself when the hatch buried deep below opened up for the launch.

“AND NOW PERISH.” The voice returned. The rocket became coated entirely in dark matter and stalled, not wanting to lift from the ground.

“I don’t think so,” N growl. He wasn’t sure how Bond was fairing with his end of the controls but he remotely increased the power to the point where his observation room spark suddenly and lost power. He now couldn’t see the radars but with the tremendous noise he knew it was a success. Rising like a black spire from the Earth was the rocket, trudging forward through the stormy conditions outside.

“And now I have you Dark Star!” said Geno, a ball of light hovering outside. While locked out of HQ he’d gotten back up waiting just outside of Earth. “You’re being deported baby!” Geno fused with the rocket for a moment before he was flicked off like a flea.

“YOU WERE FOOLISH TO TRY YOUNGSTER. THE BELL HOLDER WILL PERISH NOW!” said the ‘rocket’. Once again the stall problem returned.

“You think?! Where’d you come from anyway? Oh never mind. Follow my lead.”

Together they combined to attack the rocket’s black coating, this time reducing the dark star’s influence to the measly but defiant tip with their combined effort. Up and up the rocket tore through gloomy thick clouds and ever closer to the void until it disappeared, out of their realm. The Earth was free of Doom Reverb.

When Agent N climbed out of the manhole, behind him was a crater and destroyed neighborhood from the launched. Once his feet were on dry land he ripped the gas mask off and walked around for a bit in the rain, completely numb.

He glanced up at his team under the roof of a fuel station. All remaining were there, even Kylie who was on the ground leaning on a gas pump with a blanket over her.

“Good. I know your next meeting will be hectic with the case studies and the rehiring you’ll have to do and the damage reports and-”

Agent N stopped him there. “It won’t be. Will that civilian recover fine? Yes? Then that’s great.” He let his loosened tie hit the wet concrete. “I quit.”

Right outside the Star Temple were the usual things really, as long as everyone forgot about the blinking leg bands they wore and the star officers standing around on the property because that wasn’t weird or anything...

“I know we were guilty to an extent, but is not your time better spent elsewhere?” Skolar noted, on a bench reading a book.

“We has't been toldeth to remain alert of a passing criminal,” the guard replied.

Meanwhile Klevar was excessively refreshing the Toad Town message boards on a portable version of his granite computer before Misstar marched up to him.

“You’re always on that thing. Look up sometimes. See something beautiful- like me!”

“Or this shooting star! How lovely!” Mamar chimed, setting down her knitting supplies. Darting across the sky was a black speck spinning wildly.

Eldstar stopped stacking cards on a table to squint at it, thinking that dark star was very familiar while the star guards hanging around went on hot pursuit of the comet. Not that he minded, but they forgot one, the guy that was coming his way.

“Eldstar? I’m back. Where’s ‘it’?” Geno asked in low voice, wearing a fake nose and eyeglasses to hide his identity to the police.

Far back in an almost forgotten portion of the Star Temple sat a machine, square shaped and wheezing from age yet running with green encrypted texts patterned across the otherwise black screen. It controlled then and now but only if a condition was satisfied. With a simple command UTC on Earth lingered for a second too long at 23:59 of April 4, 2016….

Chapter End Notes

Okay, I’m finally going to play my trump card that I’ve envisioned as the ending for a while. The last paragraph kind of makes my twist obvious but at the same time, you’ll see!
Obligatory disclaimer: Mario and co. belong to Nintendo.

Created: 9/18/18, 9/21, 24, 25, 26. 10/12, 11/4, 11/5, 11/10, 11/13, 11/21, 11/30, 12/3, 12/4, 12/5

23. Today is Just a Day..

It was a normal early morning at the Mario residence. Luigi leaned up in bed and stretched. Mario snored loudly in the background as usual. It was 6 AM. What was the on agenda? Oh right he thought, he was going to play Daisy and Toad with Mario in a tennis game. Why his brother scheduled back to back weekend events he didn’t know- Over a decade in the Kingdom (somehow starting at the age of twenty-four) and he still hadn’t adapted to Mario’s frantic nature. (And he felt he’d only gained a year. But the time differences compared to the Real World was another story.)

“Still worth it,” he thought out loud. “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

A loud buzz went off to his side coming from Mario’s phone on the nightstand. It was quickly followed by an obnoxious ringtone of World 1-1.

“Peach! Don’t say yes to him!” Mario flung the covers over his head, eyes bulk wide.

“Hey, pipes for brains, wake up call! Bwa ha ha!” The Mario brothers could hear a loud ‘Koopa Symphony’ in the background of Bowser’s voice. “Ah hem. But anyway, if we lose our match today, you’re toast! Oh and tell the Princess I’ll be looking my best today. Just for her!”

“Lastly. Umm, well. What’s the recipe for that Couples Cake again? You know, the one only friends eat together? *Mumbling noises were heard*- Kamek, no this isn’t Mario- *mumbling noises* Umm, gotta go. Keep that cellphone smokin’! Wait, that don’t make sense. Whatever. See ya, plumber breath.”

“I didn’t want to play anyway. My tennis elbow was acting up,” Luigi said quickly. “Don’t let me mess up your whole frenemy thing.”

Mario sat up with his legs over the edge of the bed, dialing someone’s number. “Cut that out, little brother. I’d forgotten Bowser mentioned that yesterday. Too bad for him. No koopa’s breaking up the Marios.”

“Actually I’m sticking with my original plans, but feel free to watch from the sidelines and sulk on the bleachers like you normally do!” Mario hung up when the line suddenly went dead. “..Oh well. He’s a big koopa, he’ll manage.” Mario got up from bed still in white undershirt and boxers. “Now what’s going to be for breakfast?”

Kamek ducked as a matte black object shot over his head and cracked against the nearest wall. Bowser stomp his feet hard, jostling all of the objects near him, his piles of books including but not limited to ‘Pride and Prejudice’, iron barbells, Dark Land territory maps, a mug of black coffee, and lastly his prize framed photograph of Mario smiling cheerily while doing a v sign.

“How dare Mario reject ME!… Erm, that came out wrong,” Bowser said with a flush.

Kamek kept his head down. “I think you meant exactly what you said, your nastiness...”

Bowser stormed out of his throne room to the castle’s bulletin board. He had in hand a print out Iggy made for him a while back with the text: ‘Friendship ended with Mario’. He just had to post it to feel better but he’d need to clear some space. There were help wanted signs because of the constant need, Lemmy’s vibrant coloring sheets, Ludwig shamelessly promoting independent concerts, Larry trying to advertise his DJ services, Morton attempting to have a ‘word of the week’, Wendy selling Avon, Iggy looking for someone female in the castle that would date him, and absolutely nothing from Roy because he was illiterate..

“Ah, perfect.” Bowser ripped off an innocuous blank sheet of paper then glanced at his own addition, seething anger boiling up inside all over again. As he crumbled the blank sheet in his palm, he noticed ink rubbing off on his hand. He unfolded the paper slightly to see words appearing from thin air.

“To all Koopalings:” it said at the top. “The plan, should you choose to cooperate, and you should or face disciplinary action, is to invade Peach’s castle on this date: Friday April 3, 2016 which is today, so pay attention plebeians. Yes that is you! Take a note on your silly little phone if you must!”

“Now,” the mysterious paper continued, “By the later half of today our garbage man underling who is so insignificant I shall not name him should have distributed our tainted soda cans in Toad Town to force mass chaos that will persuade the Princess to finally surrender. PS: DO NOT TELL KING DAD. As Dark Land’s commander in chief it is time I take matters in my own hand. Oh, and Bowser is dumb!”

The heat sensitive paper got darker from Bowser’s rage, eventually wrinkling and combusting into thin powder. Ludwig, dressed in morning robes came around the corner with some tea in hand.

“LUDWIG?!?” the entire castle heard at once. As the young military commander’s ceramic mug shattered on the floor, Bowser did a ‘come here’ gesture...

Kylie Koopa the reporter was at the Mushroom Press this early morning and getting nowhere with her current story. She shot her hands in the air in desperation. “Time for the back up scoop on-”

“Your mother?” Mitch Toad, her smirking rival was right across in his space.

Kylie shot him an eye dagger just as the new guy was coming inside the building. The mysterious newbie dashed from the door to their cubicle on the opposite side of the press before Kylie called them out.

“Sit still for a second so I can meet ya.” Kylie got up and offered her hand.

Kylie smiled at their voice being a bit gruffer than expected. “I’m Kylie if ya don’t know. Ace reporter. You?”

“Zoo Diddley,” Mitch butt in, not glancing over his shoulder as he clacked away writing whatever usual ‘trash’ for the Mushroom Enquirer. “What are you even doing here, dude?”

Zoo grinned hard. “Bro, maybe I want to be a garbage man AND journalist! I thought this was all a dream but you remember too? Cool. Don’t worry about ‘that thing’. I dumped them somewhere else… I still dent your car with my bike though.”

Kylie stifled a laugh. She didn’t get what the heck anyone was talking about, but as long as Mitch was suffering...

“It’s called the ‘Flutter effect’, right? Its the small things that can break the space time continuum,” Zoo continued. “So, wanna hang out?”

In a flash Kylie was ready to go, camera and all. “Right on, brother! Let’s hit the tennis stadium and I’ll show ya how this reporting business is done, unlike Greeny over there!”

At 8 AM in the morning, this was a bright sunny day in Toad Town with crowds starting to gather for the tournament in advance. Luigi thought he was showing up early, guess not!

Toad was at a stand selling stuff. “Sup, homeboy. Wanna try my hand spun shroom shakes?”

Luigi took the blue cup that was offered and gulp it down. “It’s pretty good!”

“Thanks loser. Uh, I mean Luigi. I gotta break my random insult habit,” he said as Mario and Yoshi were approaching. “You two! Come get a sample while it lasts because I’m going pro.”

“They’ll will have no choice but to offer me a contract after I win today with Daisy.”

“Actually I appreciate the enthusiasm,” Mario nudged his sibling. “Remember, Luigi? In our last match vs Yoshi and Shy Guy half the audience were snoozing!”

Luigi turned to Yoshi, hesitating to say something confrontational. “Well some people, uh, might have napped for a bit? I think? Maybe?”

Yoshi crossed his arms as he walked off. “Shy Guy and I had a strategy! A strategy!”

Later Mario was chatting with Peach about how normal this day felt, completely unlike yesterday where something felt off. Oh well, he was glad it passed..

“You’re Mario, right?!” Mario heard a lowish voice call out to him while heading to the locker rooms. It was a dark boo wearing a ball cap and holding a little camera. “Got anything to say? Call me Sue, by the way.” ‘Sue’ gave Mario a rather firm handshake.

“I don’t have a story much. This isn’t a grudge match or a charity event. Just know I’m going to play my best and I won’t let anything stop us. Not even Bowser!”

Sue stared at Mario for a second intrigued. “That’s perfect,” he muttered oddly.

Mario reach the locker room with duffle bag in tow. He pulled out his trusty old blue racket that had seen better days, especially with parts of it chipping off. Luigi handed over a spare green racket right away.

“-That’s not all. I was just thinking that we’re more roommates than brothers these days. When’s the last time we hung out and it wasn’t because of an adventure? Sometimes its alright to just have a normal day.”

“Now that I can agree with. Promise to not back peddle on my toes like last time.”

“No guarantees!” Mario swung around the spare in the air. “Now let’s get out there and hope Toad and Daisy haven’t broke into a fight. You know how they can hardly stand each other.”

Lakitu saw the brothers enter the court and blew an air horn. “Alright. Everybody’s here,” he said in a bored fashion.

There was a decent size crowd on exactly one side of the stadium but none on the left. Toad and Daisy were already on their side of the court looking competent and itching to play. Toad even had a flowery band on his head that must have been borrowed from Daisy.

Mario picked up the ball, ready to make the first serve. Toad lunged for the ball and knocked it back but he continued to roll all the way into a reporter that was absentmindedly standing too close to the white line. Luigi return the ball in the open gap Toad left but Daisy did a back flip into position. The ball was lobbed right in the Marios’ center court.

It took everything Mario had to not jump in the way, but he stay put against the net. Luigi sent the ball flying with a purple fiery trail pass Mario and right down the court. It went so fast past Daisy that she spun like a top off the field to collide into another reporter while Toad stared blankly.

Mario pat his brother on the back. “Great job. Now we just have to do that over… and over… and over.”

Then the brothers turned to the sky to see a Koopa Battleship approaching from the West. Its drone of engines grew louder and louder as some of the crowd instinctively ran.

“Cover her,” Mario said under his breath. Luigi immediately verified Peach was okay.

“ATTENTION MARIO LOSERS!” Bowser barked from some sort of intercom as the airship halt one hundred feet or so right above the stadium. “PREPARE TO FACE THE ULTIMATE…. No no no no! DON’T TOUCH THAT-!!” The airship dropped right onto the left stadium seats in a horrible crash. Mario shielded his eyes from the pillar of fire. Concrete and metal from steel benches flew into the sky..

While what was left of the airship began to burn and black smoke spread, six of the koopalings and Junior frantically rushed out on the tennis field. Junior clung straight onto the net sobbing. “King Dad was yelling at me! Make him stop yelling at me!”

“That’s why six year olds don’t drive, retard,” Larry snickered, even though he couldn’t drive either at fifteen because he lost his permit.

“There’s no harm in being a person who cannot be trusted operating a motorized vehicle. Or anything with wheels really..” Iggy added, missing the point.

“Check me out!” Lemmy rolled all over the court with his self made tennis ball roller blades.

Morton meanwhile was picking up a well worn yet expensive gold ring on the ground. “Everyone look here! Quickly! Expediently!”

“No I don’t!!” Blushing, Roy shoved it Wendy’s way. She didn’t appreciate the sexism, but being a spoiled brat won over her ethics so she accepted happily.

“Uh, guys?” Mario interrupt. Luigi, Toad, Daisy, and even Yoshi had his back. “Where are your leaders?”

The smoke from the airships open door turned white, revealed a second later to actually be fire extinguisher. Ludwig step out next. “Vater! The vessel will no longer combust!”

Bowser shoved Ludwig out the doorway a second later, making him tumble down the bleachers. “I’m standing right next to you, stupid.”

Bowser marched right up to Mario. He didn’t even glance at Peach, he was that serious. “Moustache. Listen up and listen up REAL GOOD!!!-” He glanced around dumbly, especially upon seeing the score. “Wait, where is everyone? Did we show too early? Aww, crap. We weren’t supposed to arrive until mid to late game to terrorize you losers!”

“You wanted to cancel our game?!” Toad exclaim like it was super serious, but everyone else was looking relieved.

“Oh.. just that dear… I’m glad you weren’t planning anything harmful,” Peach remarked a little too soon.

Bowser bared his fangs. “I tell ya what, hotness. Since the show’s over I think we will beat ya’ll after all! Physically! Ya know, real assault. Or something….GET THEM!”

Mario whipped back towards Bowser’s hoards of children when eight tennis balls bounced his way, some on mark others wildly off. Bowser now held a purple emblem racket and his children had some trainer rackets stolen from the nearest supply closet. Their side of the court had the metal grate with the stadium’s supply of tennis balls in it!

“Enough!!! Let us attack the plumber!!” Ludwig yelled for no reason, obviously deaf from this morning.

“Mario, we got you covered.” Yoshi deflected the balls with a trainer racket. Luigi was to his left doing the same and now Peach even held a racket on his right. Daisy was pulling up in the rear double wielding rackets and Toad was charging up to the net like a warrior. Or a crazy person. Likely both. Mario swiftly grab his racket from the ground and began to play.

“Knock out the midget first!” Larry tried and failed to hit Toad who was zipping around close to the net.

Yoshi was so experienced playing that he almost zoned out. "..You know in the 90s I could have gotten a condo in Toad Town for cheap. But I was like, noooo. Now I couldn't afford to if I wanted… Do I sound old now?”

“We can’t keep this up for long!” Peach narrowly dodged the ball heading her way which instead hit Mario.

“Guys, we have to aim for the source. Or, Bowser I mean. See him in the back?” Daisy squint to see past the mass of koopalings.

“Good idea, homegirl. Chaaaaaaaarge!!!” Completely out of turn, Toad hopped over the fence past Morton, Lemmy, Wendy, and Ludwig near the net, past Larry who was struggling to not cry like a wimp from what Yoshi had done, past Iggy who had headphones on, and past Roy who was distracted by Daisy’s athletic outfit.

“Where do you think you’re going?!” Bowser Junior unexpectedly knocked Toad down. “Just sit right there! I’m gonna shoot stuff!”

Bowser turned to see his youngest son manning the practice ball shooter and aiming it at Toad. The machine’s barrel budged from the improper air pressure used and the tennis balls stuffed in it.

“Nooooo!” Bowser abandoned the game and rushed over just as there was a huge explosion. Both teams paused as Bowser and his son were blown high into the sky, right up and over the stadium’s walls on the right side.

Toad got up without a scratch. “That was totally my plan. Let’s play again.”

“What a weird day,” Yoshi lament, beginning to call his girlfriend Birdo to share the news.

“I wouldn’t say that. Sometimes, a day is just a day.” Mario stared into the sky.

Outside the court, few were hanging around just in case the game continued after the intermission..

“I hope my Luigi is okay,” one little boo wearing a t-shirt with Luigi’s face on it muttered over and over.

“And I hope I can find my ring mixed up in there,” Kylie added, tapping her foot constantly as she stood around. It gave her good and bad memories alike, from the person who gave it to her but was essential none the less.

A shadow covered everyone that grew and grew and then- WHAM! Everyone but Kylie ran as Bowser plopped down flat in the grass. Junior fell into a nearby tree with rustling, falling leaves and twigs, before getting caught up by the straps on his Koopa Scouts backpack.

“Yeah. Give him space, people! Gosh! Or just back the heck up,” Wendy added.

Bowser’s eyes fluttered open and the first thing he saw was someone wearing pink. “Peach!! You’d better not say yes to HIM-”

The titular princess slapped him hard. “You are banned from this stadium,” she spoke triumphantly.

“-And stay away!” Mario shout at Bowser and his kid’s backs while they were kicked to the curb. With that the remaining lingerers thinned out, another Bowser ‘plot’ foiled by Mario and company! Back out where the food stands were, everything was normal. Luigi ran across a little boo wearing some of his merchandise that he thought no one knew about.

Boo began to sweat and blush profusely. “H-hi I’m uh, Booigi the, uh, Second, and uh-”

“Watch out!” Luigi pulled Boo aside just as a mini bullet bill shot past them. Luigi spot the assailant right away, Bowser Junior.

“Grr, I wanted to hit that one,” the six year old mumbled, meaning Toad who was packing up his stand not far away.

“That’s just too bad for you. Go home.” Yoshi picked up the child and gave him the boot, literally!

Kylie’s excitement died down when she met co worker at the parking lot. “I’m sorry, brother. I left ya and I was supposed to be training you. This might cheer you up.” She showed off a super embarrassing photo snapped of Peach slapping the snot (clearly seen as she good zoom lenses) out of Bowser. So they took Zoo’s bike and was heading back to the press when they got caught behind a Mushroom Bus at the stop light. Zoo nearly had a heart attack when the group of koopas waiting at the stop collectively noticed him.

Like a switch went off Ludwig lunged for Zoo, knocking him straight off the bike. “You are fired!!”

“That is the underling that poisoned my mind! Let me at him!” Ludwig fought, only being held back by Roy and Morton. Zoo got straight up but he held back, recalling the past. Or “past”. Apparently hindsight could help even a lunatic like Zoo..

“STOP THAT!” Bowser step between Ludwig and Zoo. “You made a horrible plan Ludwig, stop pointing fingers and get over it! You, garbage dude. You’re that person mentioned in the note right? Where’s the sodas then?” He turned back to his kids.

Iggy giggled nervously. “The Sumo bros were done with deliveries by this morning, so uh.. ask that guy?”

Bowser scratched his chin. “Then to get this situation done with forever, the next move should be to-”

Bowser guffawed. “Or wipe it off the planet. Calling an airstrike on Toad Town’s Junkyard, over!” he said into a radio.

“Great, here’s our pimpin’ ride,” Larry said as the bus finally pulled up.

“Freeze koopas!” Everyone spun around. Yet again, Mario and co had caught up.

“This really is a small level map where we keep runnin’ into each other,” Bowser grumbled.

“The bus stop is one minute away from the stadium so we heard it all. We are NOT letting you drop a bomb in my kingdom!” Peach warned firmly.

Bowser flashed that grin. “Try me, hotness!” Bowser and his kids stormed that poor little bus, with Ludwig forcing the driver out with his zapper. The bus plowed forward, running over Zoo’s bike and dragging it along while he and Kylie watched the entire thing happen on the sidewalk.

“Oops, sorry guys,” Mario said, meaning it. “We’ll make it up to you later. Everyone to the dump first!” “He galvanized his friends, Peach, Luigi, Daisy, Yoshi, and Toad to head for that junkyard, leaving the reporter and her apprentice in the dust.

Finally Kylie turned to Zoo slowly. “Well… this is pretty typical for the job. What are you smiling so much about all of a sudden?”

Kylie paused and stared him in the face. “Brother, you got some secrets don’t ya?” She smiled afterward. “Well that’s fine with me, but that’s weird for you to bring up. I get the feeling you two wouldn’t get along. Ya’ll got different styles for sure..”

Bellstar Doomella kicked her legs idly while waiting around until the cell door of her sparkly impenetrable prison finally open. She jumped up quickly, but saw no one directly in the door way.

“Yes, love. So much that I want your autograph,” said Dark Ztar standing in the doorway. With the door swung open she saw the star jailers too.

“Why, doesn’t it look familiar?” He unfold it and she realized that it had all of her old criminal charges from millenniums ago plus some newer details tacked on to the bottom in ink that was still wet.

Her face twisted in mixed emotion. “How could you?? I thought you didn’t care?”

“It’s quite simple Mrs. Bellstar. I don’t, but you borrowed twenty dollars from me back in the day and with interest that’s about, say-”

She ripped it out of his hands and tore the scroll up, prompting someone in the back to clear their throat.

Eldstar himself step up, though cautiously behind the guard. “Don’t wear yourself out dear. As for you Zach-”

“Okay fine, but I thought your cooperation was because of that grave thing Doomella almost did to the Star Spirits?”

Doomella yawned. “So I tried to destroy you all and take over the universe forever ago. What’s wrong with a little fun?”

“This is,” Eldstar stated, becoming serious. “You have a new banishment location where there are no loop holes regarding alien psionic powers mortals happen to have and such. I think you’ll like it actually. You will get to be your normal self!”

Her eyes lit up. “For real?? Get out of town! Still though, why is that crusty dude here?”

“Watch it, fool,” Dark Ztar hissed. “I had evidence from you back at Sarasaland that helped determine your new punishment. Do enjoy rotting away wherever you are going.” He showed off his broken cellphone. Some might say it’s still accidentally recording to this day.

Eldstar chuckled at that statement. “Why don’t you show her the way, Zach? Take a look at her banishing report right there.”

Dark Ztar picked up one of the many pieces of the scroll littering the floor. His monocle popped off his face. “She’s banished to the ‘Dark Realm?!’ I can’t share my bloody abode with her!” he scream over Doomella and eavesdroppers, prisoners and guards alike, laughing wildly.

Back at the Star Temple, back at his throne where it seemed it all started, Eldstar made sure he hadn’t forgotten anything. The mortals of Earth met the moral requirement for his computer to do a mild reset, (It broke and needed the Geek Squad right after, talk about good timing), the law enforcers were no longer breathing down the necks of his friends and charges were dropped, and he’d rectify his costly mistake made involving Doomella’s banishment location. As the epitome of fair and good the Great Eldstar thought he’d finally done well.

Dr. Toad was in his office hanging up his latest decoration, a medium sized water color painting he’d done when someone bang on his door. Muttering under his breath he sat it down and answered.

Morris poked him in the shoulder. “Lighten up, fellow. A few of us like the ‘Shrink’, the division five youngers, and Topper were going to head somewhere nice for breakfast.”

Morris nodded, holding a wrinkly coupon proudly. “Buy one family special and get a free entree. See?”

Dr. Toad stared at it for a second. He DID need to get out more and it could take his mind off of other matters. Heck, maybe he should even catch up on what his family was doing back home. Yes, even his thug step brother.

Thomas the castle front door guard was goofing off on his Nintendo DS as usual. He heard the clack of shoes and slipped the goods away just as Toadette kicked open the doors.

“Uh huh,” she continued, sticking around to his dismay. “I just wanted to use natural ingredients like these white pebble things. Mr. Toadsworth told me they were sodium crystals but honestly I- What’s that bubbling sound??”

SPLASH! Shooting up from the moat was a heap of water from the landmine that exploded. Water quickly swept them into the yard.

Thomas spat up an entire fish. “Better call a bomb expert and I know one. My uncle’s shop isn’t far from this Dr. Toadley guy..”

At Mushroom Kingdom Hospital East, a tall sledge brother entered wearing a doctor’s coat and a fedora. He march straight up to Nass T.’s desk as it was a slow morning.

“Hello, can I help you?” the busy head nurse asked. The doctor slid a note her way under the glass. Nass saw it and blink a few times. “Who are you again?”

“Courtesy from the Giant Land Hospital, little lady,” the doctor said very low.

Nass glanced at the note one last time. It read: ‘You know the end is near for this facility. Let us pay you to help it along.’

“How much?” She mouthed without actually speaking, being reminded about MK East’s problems in recent times.

With a half smile, the doctor brought out a shiny pen and scribbled a huge number on the paper. At the sight of it, Nass’s hand lay on her phone to call Doctor Professor Koopa. Almost.

“We’ll handle our problems our way,” she said decidedly, going back to the computer. She wasn’t perfect but she also wouldn’t go that low..

The doctor crumbled the paper with a start, shoving it deep in his pocket. “You will see that is a mistake!”

In an instant a whomp guard with an eye patch was shoving the ‘visitor’ back out the doors.

Reggie Business bro, founder of Fungus Up was interrupted by a worker barging into his office.

“Sir, you might want to look at this,” the magikoopa wearing a sun visor said.

When Reggie came to the front door there were a group of young protesters, goombas, koopas, buzzy beetles, magikoopas, and more holding signs with a lone toad security guard in the back.

“There you are, scum!” the goomba girl in the front with purple hair and piercings scream through a megaphone. She was Raven, the leader of the Dark Land debate club. “We have evidence of your unsafe and speciesist labor practices!”

A skittish toad security guard with black glasses stroll up. “Yeah I have it on tape. I actually work for Morel Moxie. Is it weird that I tape everything? I’m recording right now- Hehehe.”

Raven’s boyfriend, the boomerang bro in a trench coat and trilby cleared his throat. “Could you just show the footage you showed us earlier?”

The toad guard slap his face. “Right! Take a gander at this, evil doer!” He dramatically presented footage from right inside the FungusUp factory via a drone in the window. Captured on film were the underpaid Dinosaur Land immigrants breaking their backs to work. Reggie went pale on the spot but his magikoopa worker shoved the tablet away.

“Then let’s check,” Raven said. She along with the rest of the protesters storm the FungusUp building and Reggie was hopeless to stop any of it.

“I have an idea...” Reggie regain his composure with a mischievous glint in his eye.

Somewhere just outside of Toad Town was an old trailer in a lot with a beat up work truck parked beside it, both spray painted colorfully. Inside Richard lay down his hand. Goombas didn’t have hands so it was a good thing that was a figure of speech. He had all aces with his deck of cards. “Go fish, wimps.”

Sebastian, a snifit seated across the table dropped his to the floor. “I can NEVER win.”

Parabilly shushed the snifit, clacking away on his laptop. “I’m wait’n for an email from my folks. There’s this restaurant down town and he can score us a deal.”

The old parakoopa was interrupted by the door trailer door swinging open. Their leader James pushed Wiggletron inside still holding paint cans. The monty mole on the other hand was covered in sweat.

“Boys,” James started, digging in a closet for his hazmat suit. “We gots an urgent one! Remember that fake story in the news ‘bout the Giant Land Hospital trying to bribe others out of business? An anonymous tip from just this morning says it’s true after all! We gotta bust em!”

This news shocked everyone into silence until Sebastian hesitantly faced the mega goomba’s way. “Umm… Aren’t you from Giant Land?”

“Yep,” Richard replied with a straight face. Believe it or not, he was fully convinced that ALL people from Giant Land were jerks. Yes, that included himself.

Somewhere in the galaxy, Rosalina was back at the Space Observatory’s library.

“Also, this!” screamed a random luma grunt. They and a few others dropped some cannonballs from Bowser on the floor for no reason, resulting in many bouncing and rolling. Rosalina ordered them to get rid of those relics of the past lest they start a time paradox, so why they were bringing them to her she haven’t a clue, especially when she was busy emailing her date who was running a little late!

“Take them away,” Rosalina repeated over her shoulder. She heard a noise. “He is here! Everyone prepare!”

Standing outside the library door was the most handsome man, tall, dark skinned, and wearing a traditional garb of royalty. Rosalina nearly fainted on sight, but held it all together enough to walk off with him in the distance chatting away.

Probabilly nailed the last board across the windows. The storm that wasn’t supposed to be until Saturday decided to sweep Southern Mushroom Kingdom early, locking most of the shanty town inside and leaving it up to him to secure the hospital’s leaky windows. At least that mess was done with. Back inside the lobby was toasty and warm, but Jr. Troopa was at his favorite table, the one under his very own fishing trophy on the wall.

Jr. Troopa leaned up from the calculus books. “I asked my buddy for help but I ain’t gonna get it in this weather. I asked Vick but he’s dumb as bricks and Laki doesn’t work till tomorrow. Rou T. gave it a look and got a headache. I’m desperate!”

Shaking his head, the elder paratroopa pulled a chair up. “Know how I can fix anything? It’s all math, hear?”

Probabilly hovered the pencil over the worksheets for a minute before finally taking off his wet hood. “Get me a sec. I can never decide what formula I wanna use..”

That night, the Southern Mushroom Kingdom would get record rain fall for early spring- twelve inches in fact. Everyone was okay though, because hardly anyone was ever sick down South. It must be something in the water, but in a good way, hear?

Late back at the Mushroom Press, the staff were out aside from Mitch, who was showing Zoo something on his computer screen.

“So all of those people are like us?” Zoo asked. On the forums were numerous confused people earnestly believing that today Friday had repeated.

Mitch nodded. “This sort of thing is kind of a research project for me. Keep it on the hush, okay? So...” Mitch shut off the computer and began to pack up. “What are you gonna do with yourself now?”

Zoo thought for a moment. What would he do now as a ‘reporter’ who had lots to learn but also evenings off? “I got it.” Zoo snapped as he head out.

“-You’re gonna perform at Club Gamecube.” Mitch laughed, reading Zoo like a book. “Do you think your handsome noki friend would like that place?”

Zoo froze in the doorway flushing. “Shut up! I was going to try to call him tomorrow with the office phone and it won’t be a prank call so don’t screw with me, bro!”

“What ever dude...” After a pause, Mitch found himself staring at Kylie’s office space. Maybe he had someone to check up on himself...

Friday April 3, 2016 had come and gone. Mario and a few others arrived at Peach’s castle to find the ground damp even though it didn’t rain in East Toad Town. Mario’s ears were still ringing from that Bowser Bomb that went off, but it could have been worse. At least they could say no one can possibly get involved in whatever the tainted soda thing was.

“Will I tell you another day? Yes I will,” he replied, his expression hidden in the darkness. “Just be glad this day did not turn out the way it could have..”

Before Mario could interpret that, Luigi snuck up on him. “Check this out. Fresh from the factory today!” Luigi held a white can in his hand labeled ‘New FungusUp’ and took a sip. “The marking blurb is that it tastes the exact same minus any illegal ingredients, but I’m not so sure.”

“Me neither,” Daisy added, putting an arm around Luigi’s shoulder. “I think robots make it now. Yep. That has to be it.”

Mario tasted it and- Yuck, he wasn’t a fan. He didn’t protest when Bowser snatched it for his own taste but he did when Bowser spit it back out at him.

“Oh that, hotness? I just wanted to make sure I’d caught all the Dark Land protesters hanging around.”

Bowser crossed his arms. “I hate those brats. Always complaining first being tired of being World 8, then if it’s possible to love a paper towel, then the pharmacies being overpriced. Heh. If anything my work force is too medicated. I can’t stand that stank fire flower plant the kids use. What now? Get to the point?? Oh yeah, the new topic was working conditions and they might stop here soon with the way you pay these toads ‘round here,” Bowser added with a chuckle.

Peach looked suddenly disturbed. “Every toad is getting a raise!” she announced loudly out of the blue.

Mario received a slip of paper while no one was looking with Bowser’s new phone number. “What a day,” he said, eager for Bowser’s next phone call that would lead to the next adventure. Maybe too eager.

Chapter End Notes

Author note: Yeah, if not obvious this is a slightly different time line Mario and co. are living now. All for the better I say! Thanks for reading if you’re out there.

-Named after a story from a FF.net user named 12345678910111213141516171819.

Dates:
9/18/18, 10/18/18, 19, 10/23/18, 10/29/18, 10/30, 11/9/18, 11/10/18, 11/19/18, 11/21, 11/27, 12/3, 6,7, 12/9, 12/10

Mario and Bowser's New Frenemy Adventure Season Two

12. New Day, New Problems, 2nd Edition

13. Luigi's Awesomely Ambivalent Allegory

14. Friends Family and ‘Associates’

15. April 4, 444 CE

16. East Side Mario Story

17. Stan

18. Minesweeper

19. Mario Party

20. Mario Party 3

21. The Power of Friendship

22. Burning the Bridges

23. Today is Just a Day..

Afterword

Mario and Bowser's New Frenemy Adventure *Season Two*

12. New Day, New Problems, 2nd Edition

13. Luigi's Awesomely Ambivalent Allegory

14. Friends Family and ‘Associates’

15. April 4, 444 CE

16. East Side Mario Story

17. Stan

18. Minesweeper

19. Mario Party

20. Mario Party 3

21. The Power of Friendship

22. Burning the Bridges

23. Today is Just a Day..

Afterword

Mario and Bowser's New Frenemy Adventure Season Two